o/~ o/~ Oooooh!! It's a Hoosier Hoosier Hoosier - thing, you just wouldn't understand -- Unless *you* lived in Hoosier Hoosier Hoosier - Land o/~ o/~

WARNING !!! It will be of great help to you to read this article phonetically ... that's sounding out the words-style ... so yank out them "Hooked On Phonics ^tm tapes and let's proceed ...

Whelp, I re'kons it does help to be born a Hoosier to be a Hoosier, but we's really aren't all tha' picky about formal'ties though. We sorts of figg'r *anyone* cou'd be's a Hoosier if'n they's tried. *chuckle* Now ferst off, you's gotta sort of talk lik'n that you's nev'r took an English class w'iles you was 'n school ... it com's purty easy likes then to folks if worded like that. But's I re'kons I shou'd warn ya that it does become pre'ty darn addi'tive and you's finds yerself doing it all's the time after a bit ... sorta likes tha' Roman lingo, I think I's recol'ect tha' they calls it "pig latin".

TRANSLATION :"We like to imagine that anyone can eventually 'walk the walk, talk the talk' while in Indiana. English majors and Speech Therapists will cringe in terror though - at first."

Befores you says somet'in' likes "No on's in their righ' mind would wan'a talk likes that!!!", let's me point out to you's tha' a fell'r withs the name of Riley, who lived early on, made purty darn good money's with it.

TRANSLATION : "A man born in the late 1880's in central Indiana wrote popular poetry for children using slang and partially broken English (rural Indiana manner of talking)."

Now ferst off, you's gots to le'rn hows to insert the "r" sound into cert'in words. . .most imp'rtantly the word "wash". We will excuse some er'ors, but's we's is kinda 'ardfast on the rule that you's gotta say it like "warsh", no ifs ands buts or maybes about it. It may not be a midwes'ern sort of trademark granted only's to us here in the Hoosier state ... but it be one that's we seems purty darn proud of tho's. So's let's say thats you's is goin' on a trip, then you's would be tellin' yer friends, "I gots to warsh my clothes b'for's I can leave for Warshington to sees the kinfolks."

TRANSLATION : "Essentially just a long paragraph on how to properly mis-say the word "wash".

Some's us here uses the terms "kick'n back" as an exampl' of how's "laid back" we's can be's with our friends or even's by's ours'lves!! It jus' means that's we is just sit'in' around, doin' nothin' fancy-like. We's also likes to sit out on our fron' stoops or (if'n we has one) the fron' porch alot ... we's jus' sits there waitin' to talk to the other neighbor folks who are a bit more en'rgetic and walks about the area.

TRANSLATION : "A pretty relaxed person who is easily amused by sitting out on their front step or front porches to converse with those who happen by. They also don't expect frien's to "go all out", accepting of a casual, quiet evening."

Nows if'n you's thinks that you might like to stay here fer a spel', and you's thinkin' that a h'use maybes the nice th'ng fer your fam'ly ... here's a descr'p-t-ion of a re'lly nice Hoos'er home: Its will have a crick nearbys to it, pref'r'bl'y in the re'r of it somewheres; a nice sized lin'n press; a back porch is nice and all, but we's feels there is nothin' like a fron' stoop though; and check out wh'n the las' t'rnado passed thr'u' dem dere parts.

TRANSLATION: If considering buying a house, a typical Indiana "dream house" would be one that had a creek nearby on the property, an averaged sized "towel closet" for your towels and linens, a front porch (with maybe an optional back porch), and out of "tornado strike zone" areas of the town you are moving into.

So's, if'n you pop's in here fer a spell, why's I could's ev'n take's you's fishin' at one of dem cricks that meander thru's here after we zips by's the mom&pop's to grab a soda pop.

TRANSLATION : "If you happen to visit me, I will take you fishing at one of the creeks after we stop by a non-chained own convience store to get a "carbonated beverage" of your choice.