Relax. It's not necessarily you.

You are likely to have good a good background, traits, and characteristics. However, various possibilities or circumstances may have intervened:

• Your date was pressured into going out with you against his or her will
  • Your date may have planned to reject you from the very outset
  • Your date may have decided to try things out without sufficient berurim
• The date may have had other things on their mind from the beginning
  • You did not stand a chance
  • Any date would have been rejected under these circumstances
• The rejection was based on a whim
  • The person wasn't in the mood for you at the time
  • On a different occasion things might have been different
• There were misunderstandings, and you are not on the same wavelength
• You have no problem, but the date was looking for something different than what you had to offer
  • This is not a value judgement about you or about the date
  • There is nothing wrong with this decision

Any number of additional items or reasons could be added to this list. They do not necessarily mean that anything is wrong with you.

How often does it happen?

If you suffer repeated rejections then perhaps you and your confidant should search for the reason. Something about you may cause rejection. Perhaps you should do some serious and objective soul-searching in order to determine the cause.

In this case your confidant may not have the expertise required in order to determine what causes people to reject others. It may be necessary to turn to another professional to deal with this issue. That does not mean that the confidant's job is limited. It does not mean that the confidant should not be involved in everything. It does mean that there may be a necessity to go beyond the confidant in this specific issue .

Correct the problem, and then accept our wishes for more successful dates.

It is very rare to require the assistance of a third party or an outside source. The reasons for rejection are usually quite simple and benign.