Stick to your list - Dating - Grossman Parenting

frustra laborat
que omnibus placere studet [Latin]
He labors in vain
who tries to please everybody

Congratulations. You've survived your first date. However, it did have an impact on you.

That impact will not necessarily move you in the right direction. The following issues may cause you to feel an unwarranted attraction for each other:

Your date is nice

Your date is considerate

Your date may try to win you over

Furthermore, that date may have raised aspects of your relationship that were not on your list. It may have also had unanticipated results:

It may have caused you to rethink the work you have done with your confidant
It may have caused you to feel that these issues should supersede or replace your prepared list

That's quite natural. After all, somebody did feel that the two of you would be compatible. You did have a positive, hopeful, and even optimistic attitude when you went out.

Does that attraction mean that the person is meant for you?

Perhaps. However, that is not necessarily the case.

Although these fine and desirable traits may impress you, they are not necessarily based on your criteria. They did not appear on your list.

Do not let your date blind you to your well-thought-out, predetermined criteria. Stick to your list, unless both you and your confidant are convinced that any deviations at this stage are based on good, objective reasons.

Beware and be aware. You've been warned.

Where do you want to go now?

See the next article in this series