You can tell more Although the information you receive from Berurim is very important, you may have to show some flexibility when interpreting the data. Keep in mind that the contacts base their statements on their own perception, and that their feelings and interpretations may differ from your own. It may also differ from the reality that you experience when meeting your date for the first time.
Remember when you played the game of Telephone? You're facing a similar situation here. Your confidant...
You will thus be making decisions based upon facts that have been filtered and modified several times.
You may hesitate to date a person because the Berurim seemed to reveal negative issues that are not on your list of priorities. You may be concerned about certain feelings – but not facts – that were presented to you. You and your confidant should strive to distinguish between fact and opinion.
This is especially important when considering what your date "wants." The contacts may have an understanding of that person's needs and desires. However, they know only what they see, and they cannot read the minds of other people. Form an opinion before the date, but allow that person to speak for himself or herself about issues that are in the realm of speculation.
Thus, if there is no significant reason not to go on a date, then you may want to give it a chance. The situation will inevitably be somewhat different than anticipated – and it may be more to your liking.
On the other hand, matchmakers sometimes pressure people to go on a date. Discuss this pressure with your confidant. You, and not others, should make the final decision about whether to date somebody.
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about a person
by what he says
about others
than you can
by what others say
about him
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