A public show of regret for the child who leaves can create problems for yourself and for the child who returns. Those who hear that you regret the situation will offer suggestions and advice. Those well-wishers may then want to become actively involved in the situation, and may expect you to follow their ideas and recommendations. They may ask other people, and possibly even legal or governmental authorities, for advice about how to deal with this situation. Their intentions may be good. They are trying to find quick and easy ways to help you manage and cope with a difficult and troubling situation.

You are not likely to appreciate such "help."

Instead, you should be careful about selecting those who will help and comfort you. Don't allow random acquaintances to offer opinions. After all, you cannot follow everybody's ideas.

You have two viable options:

• Restrict your way of handling situation, as you would with any other important situation, to a controlled number of people. They will offer intelligent recommendations and suggestions.
• Speak to a qualified consultant. This is preferred.

Don't repeat your child's mistake

When you think about it, your child who left home may have suffered from advice from a range of people. They may have been the single issue that triggered his wrong, quick-and-easy decision to leave home, in order to deal with his feelings.

Avoid falling prey to the very problem that caused your child to run away.

Limit the damage. Keep the situation under control. Select and limit the number of people with whom you will discuss this delicate issue.