to
Siobhan's Story
I will never forget May 12, 1992, for as long as I live, the
day that I found out I was pregnant with you. I was a little
farther along than we had originally thought I was, but that
didn't matter. The only thing that mattered was that you were
growing inside me. Your father and I were so excited that we
couldn't wait to find the highest mountain and shout that we were
going to be parents. We didn't though because we were also scared
that we may lose you. I had a miscarriage a year earlier and we
were afraid to tell anybody.
Your daddy went with me to every doctor appointment and when
we finally heard your heartbeat, it was the happiest day of our
lives. I thought your heartbeat sounded like a train. Your daddy
thought it sounded like a puppy. I remember asking the doctor to
let us listen to it again and again. He wanted to get on with the
exam but your daddy and I only wanted to listen to your
heartbeat. The only words we heard out of the doctors mouth that
day was that you were healthy and that all was progressing as it
should.
I went right home and called your Muffy and told her. I let
your daddy tell your Oma and Opa. They were all very excited and
couldn't wait for you to be born in January.
We received our first picture of you when I had my first
ultrasound. They performed it on me early because we were in the
process of being transferred to Alaska. They wanted to make sure
that it was okay for me to travel. The doctors said that I was okay to travel and to enjoy my pregnancy. We decided to take a short vacation to see your Muffy, Oma, and Opa before we moved, it was there that they were able to hear your heartbeat also. Your Muffy thought your heartbeat sounded like a train also. Your Oma and Opa weren't to sure about what it sounded like, they were just so thrilled to hear it.
On our way back home, I felt you kick for the first time. It
was a magical feeling. We pulled the car over in hopes that you
would do it again so your daddy could feel it. We didn't know
that it was too early for him to feel it, but we sat on the side
of the road for about 20 minutes. I could feel you just kicking
away and your daddy was getting a little jealous because he
couldn't feel you. I had noticed that you seemed to be kicking a
little low and decided that before we left for Alaska, I would
make an appointment to see the doctor again, just to make sure.
The evening of August 11, 1992, I knew something was wrong. My
doctors appointment was the next day, but when I started bleeding
that evening, I started to panic. I was 18 weeks pregnant and
everything had been going so smoothly. Your daddy took me to the
Emergency Room that night and they checked me over, but could not
find anything wrong. I was told to follow up with my doctor in the morning. That night was a long one and I continued to bleed.
The morning of August 12, 1992, was very low. The doctors face
said it all. I was losing you. What had gone wrong? I wasn't in
any pain from labor. You were healthy just last night. What
happened? Why is this happening to us? We were so afraid that you
might be in pain. Your heart was still beating and we knew you
were still alive, because I could feel you moving. We kept
telling them that you were going to die if they didn't do
anything. The doctor explained that my cervix was to weak
to hold you for the rest of this pregnancy and that there was
nothing that they could do. He said that you had already passed
halfway through the cervix and that he was sorry. Your daddy and
I cried and wondered, what we did wrong.
After being wheeled into labor and delivery, we were met with
a ray of sunshine. The doctor there told us that they may be able
to save you because the bag of waters had not broken. She
told us not to get to excited because it may not work, but to
hope for the best. I was given medication to relax me and
medication to relax my uterus. I was rushed to the operating room
for emergency surgery. I learned after the surgery the doctors
were able to save you. The doctors told your mommy and daddy that
we would live day to day and that the prognosis got better with
each day.
I learned that I would be in the hospital until the day that
you were born, and I was only 18 weeks pregnant with you. The
doctors and nurses at the hospital took such great care of you
and me. I got to see you everyday through the ultrasound. The
doctor wouldn't tell us whether you were a boy or a girl, we had
to wait until you were born to find out.
I was in the hospital for week when I went into labor, the
doctors were able to stop it which meant that once again you were
safe. You were safe after that for almost two weeks until I went
into labor again. Thankfully the doctors were able to stop it
again.
On September 8, 1992, I went into labor again. The doctors did
everything they could do to stop the labor, but they could not
this time. You, our precious beautiful baby girl, were born still
when I was just 22 weeks pregnant on September 9, 1992, at 3:05
am. You looked just like our daddy and had beautiful dark hair
just like me. You were so tiny, you only weighed 1 pound and you were only 12 inches long. Not big enough to live in this world, but big enough to live in our hearts forever.
We didn't know that we could have a funeral, but we had a
priest bless you after you were born. We also didn't know that we
should have held you. We didn't, we were to scared that we would
hurt you because you were so small. We didn't know that our empty
arms would ache to feel you in them. We didn't know that we could
dress you in the outfit that Muffy bought for you to go home in,
instead you wore a hospital gown and a hat. I wish we had known
all the things that we know now.
Our dear sweet Siobhan, we love you and miss you very much.
There is not a day that goes by that we don't think of you. Look
close, for on a magic carpet your baby sister, Emily, will come
to play for the day even if only in her imagination and then she will come home to us. She loves you and wishes you could come down to play, even just once. We love you sweetheart and tell your granddaddy to take good care of you and your kitties, Guido and Hans, until Mommy and Daddy can come home to you.
to
Emily McDonald
Click on the angel above, if you would like your own guardian angel.
Thank you Elizabeth for allowing me to use this graphic.
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"Wind Beneath My Wings" by Bette Midler
established January 13, 1999
I will never forget May 12, 1992, for as long as I live, the day that I found out I was pregnant with you. I was a little farther along than we had originally thought I was, but that didn't matter. The only thing that mattered was that you were growing inside me. Your father and I were so excited that we couldn't wait to find the highest mountain and shout that we were going to be parents. We didn't though because we were also scared that we may lose you. I had a miscarriage a year earlier and we were afraid to tell anybody.
Your daddy went with me to every doctor appointment and when we finally heard your heartbeat, it was the happiest day of our lives. I thought your heartbeat sounded like a train. Your daddy thought it sounded like a puppy. I remember asking the doctor to let us listen to it again and again. He wanted to get on with the exam but your daddy and I only wanted to listen to your heartbeat. The only words we heard out of the doctors mouth that day was that you were healthy and that all was progressing as it should.
I went right home and called your Muffy and told her. I let your daddy tell your Oma and Opa. They were all very excited and couldn't wait for you to be born in January.
We received our first picture of you when I had my first ultrasound. They performed it on me early because we were in the process of being transferred to Alaska. They wanted to make sure that it was okay for me to travel. The doctors said that I was okay to travel and to enjoy my pregnancy. We decided to take a short vacation to see your Muffy, Oma, and Opa before we moved, it was there that they were able to hear your heartbeat also. Your Muffy thought your heartbeat sounded like a train also. Your Oma and Opa weren't to sure about what it sounded like, they were just so thrilled to hear it.
On our way back home, I felt you kick for the first time. It was a magical feeling. We pulled the car over in hopes that you would do it again so your daddy could feel it. We didn't know that it was too early for him to feel it, but we sat on the side of the road for about 20 minutes. I could feel you just kicking away and your daddy was getting a little jealous because he couldn't feel you. I had noticed that you seemed to be kicking a little low and decided that before we left for Alaska, I would make an appointment to see the doctor again, just to make sure.
The evening of August 11, 1992, I knew something was wrong. My doctors appointment was the next day, but when I started bleeding that evening, I started to panic. I was 18 weeks pregnant and everything had been going so smoothly. Your daddy took me to the Emergency Room that night and they checked me over, but could not find anything wrong. I was told to follow up with my doctor in the morning. That night was a long one and I continued to bleed.
The morning of August 12, 1992, was very low. The doctors face said it all. I was losing you. What had gone wrong? I wasn't in any pain from labor. You were healthy just last night. What happened? Why is this happening to us? We were so afraid that you might be in pain. Your heart was still beating and we knew you were still alive, because I could feel you moving. We kept telling them that you were going to die if they didn't do anything. The doctor explained that my cervix was to weak to hold you for the rest of this pregnancy and that there was nothing that they could do. He said that you had already passed halfway through the cervix and that he was sorry. Your daddy and I cried and wondered, what we did wrong.
After being wheeled into labor and delivery, we were met with a ray of sunshine. The doctor there told us that they may be able to save you because the bag of waters had not broken. She told us not to get to excited because it may not work, but to hope for the best. I was given medication to relax me and medication to relax my uterus. I was rushed to the operating room for emergency surgery. I learned after the surgery the doctors were able to save you. The doctors told your mommy and daddy that we would live day to day and that the prognosis got better with each day.
I learned that I would be in the hospital until the day that you were born, and I was only 18 weeks pregnant with you. The doctors and nurses at the hospital took such great care of you and me. I got to see you everyday through the ultrasound. The doctor wouldn't tell us whether you were a boy or a girl, we had to wait until you were born to find out.
I was in the hospital for week when I went into labor, the doctors were able to stop it which meant that once again you were safe. You were safe after that for almost two weeks until I went into labor again. Thankfully the doctors were able to stop it again.
On September 8, 1992, I went into labor again. The doctors did everything they could do to stop the labor, but they could not this time. You, our precious beautiful baby girl, were born still when I was just 22 weeks pregnant on September 9, 1992, at 3:05 am. You looked just like our daddy and had beautiful dark hair just like me. You were so tiny, you only weighed 1 pound and you were only 12 inches long. Not big enough to live in this world, but big enough to live in our hearts forever.
We didn't know that we could have a funeral, but we had a priest bless you after you were born. We also didn't know that we should have held you. We didn't, we were to scared that we would hurt you because you were so small. We didn't know that our empty arms would ache to feel you in them. We didn't know that we could dress you in the outfit that Muffy bought for you to go home in, instead you wore a hospital gown and a hat. I wish we had known all the things that we know now.
Our dear sweet Siobhan, we love you and miss you very much. There is not a day that goes by that we don't think of you. Look close, for on a magic carpet your baby sister, Emily, will come to play for the day even if only in her imagination and then she will come home to us. She loves you and wishes you could come down to play, even just once. We love you sweetheart and tell your granddaddy to take good care of you and your kitties, Guido and Hans, until Mommy and Daddy can come home to you.
Emily McDonald
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| Gifts Received | Siobhan's Awards |
| Siobhan's Certificate | Webrings Page 2 |
 
|
"Wind Beneath My Wings" by Bette Midler