Hello, Ma'am, I'm Inspector Leopod from the Castle Purrecinct. There have been reports that you have certain knowledge about a chap named Otto, who's been goin around stealin cars and romancin young ladycats. Is that right, Ma'am?

(Who is this guy? I mean what are we paying taxes for, the Keystone Cops? Get real for heaven sakes!!!)

Well Officer, er, let me get up real close so I can see your badge, ah!! Leopod! I know a cat named Otto, but, sir I'm not sure he's such a bad cat....

Mighty fine establishment you got here. Say, that statchoo over there--bet that set you back a few samoleons!

(Where did this guy get his badge, the K-tel police academy?)

Actually, Officer Leopod, it was a present.

Now, what can you tell us about this Otto fella? Ya know the queen is offerin a reward for the return of the Oscat, and we are pretty sure this Otto has hidden it somewhere in this vicinity.

So you figured that out, eh? Good thinking!! Duh, have you also noticed that the sidewalk is wet after its been raining?

That sure is a handsome stachoo, Ma'am. And a nice gown you're wearin there,too, if I do say so!

Oh, officer, it's just a little rag I picked up at an insignificant shop. Would you care to sit down and admire... I mean discuss our business further over a Catnip Mimosa?

I wouldn't mind a sip a' tea, but I don't drink alcohol on the job, ya know.

(Yeah, right - and pigs fly.)

Well, I'll be moseyin back to the Castle now. Be sure ta call me purrsonally if ya see or hear anything.

Purrrrrsonally?!? Ooooh Officer Oscat, I mean, Leopod, you'll be the very furrrrrst one to hear if I find out anything worth reporting.

(Like right after I've told the Queen and the National Enquirer!)

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