Our Father who art in Heaven. . . .

    YES?

 Don't interrupt me. I'm praying. . . .

     BUT YOU CALLED ME.

Called you? I didn't call you. I'm praying. Our
Father who art in Heaven....

    THERE, YOU DID IT AGAIN.

Did what?

    CALLED ME. YOU SAID, "OUR FATHER WHO ART IN
    HEAVEN.." HERE I AM.  WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND?

But I didn't mean anything by it. I was, you know,
just saying my prayers for the day.  I always say the Lord's Prayer. It makes me feel good, kind of like
getting my duty done.

    ALL RIGHT. GO ON.

 Hallowed be thy name.

    HOLD IT. WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?

By what?

    BY "HALLOWED BE THY NAME."

It means....it means....good grief, I don't know what
it means.  How should I know? Its just part of the prayer. By the way, what does it mean?

    IT MEANS "HONORED," "HOLY," "WONDERFUL."

Hey, that makes sense. I never thought about what
"Hallowed" meant before. Thy Kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in Heaven.

    DO YOU REALLY MEAN THAT?

Sure, why not?

    WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT?

Doing? Nothing, I guess. I just think it would be
neat if you got  control of everything down here like
you have up there.

    HAVE I GOT CONTROL OF YOU?

Well, I go to church.

    THAT ISN'T WHAT I ASKED YOU. WHAT ABOUT
THAT HABIT OFLUST YOU HAVE?  AND YOUR BAD            TEMPER? YOU'VE REALLY GOT A PROBLEM THERE,
YOU KNOW. AND THEN THERE'S THE WAY YOU SPEND     YOUR  MONEY...... ALL ON YOURSELF. AND WHAT ABOUT THE KINDS OF BOOKS YOU READ?

 Stop picking on me! I'm just as good as some of the
rest of those phonies at the church.

       EXCUSE ME....I THOUGHT YOU WERE PRAYING FOR MY  WILL TO BE DONE.  IF THAT IS TO HAPPEN, IT WILL HAVE ONES WHO ARE  PRAYING FOR IT. LIKE YOU, FOR EXAMPLE.

 Oh, all right! I guess I do have some hang-ups. Now
that you mention it, I could probably name some others.

    SO COULD I.

 I haven't thought about it until now, but I really
would like to cut out some of those things. I'd like to, you know, be  really free.

    GOOD, NOW WE'RE GETTING SOMEWHERE. WE'LL WORK
TOGETHER.... YOU AND  ME. NOW, SOME VICTORIES CAN TRULY BE WON. I'M PROUD OF YOU.

Look Lord, I need to finish up here. This is taking
a lot longer than it usually does.... Give us this day our daily bread.

    YOU NEED TO CUT DOWN ON THE BREAD TOO...
YOU'RE OVERWEIGHT AS IT IS.

Hey, wait a minute! What is this, "Criticize Me
Day?" Here I was doing my religious duty, and all of a sudden you break in and remindme of all my hang-ups.

    PRAYING IS A DANGEROUS THING. YOU COULD WIND UP
CHANGED YOU KNOW. THAT'S WHAT I'M TRYING TO GET ACROSS TO YOU. YOU CALLED ME, AND HERE I AM.
 IT'S TOO LATE TO STOP NOW. KEEP ON PRAYING. I'M
INTERESTED IN THE NEXT PART OF YOUR PRAYER..

    WELL, GO ON.

I'm scared to.

    SCARED? OF WHAT? I KNOW WHAT YOU'LL SAY. TRY ME AND SEE.

Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin
against us.

    WHAT ABOUT JOE?

See I knew it! I knew you would bring him up! Why
he's told lies about me, cheated me out of money..
He never paid back that debt he owes  me.
I've sworn to get even.

    BUT YOUR PRAYER...WHAT ABOUT YOUR PRAYER?

 I didn't mean it.

       WELL, AT LEAST YOU'RE HONEST. BUT IT'S NOT MUCH FUN CARRYING THE LOAD OF BITTERNESS AROUND INSIDE, IS IT?

No, but I'll feel better as soon as I get even. Boy,
have I made some plans for ol' Joe. He'll wish he neve
did me any harm.

    YOU WON'T FEEL ANY BETTER. YOU'LL FEEL WORSE.
REVENGE ISN'T SWEET. THINK OF HOW UNHAPPY YOU ARE ALREADY. BUT I CAN CHANGE ALL THAT.

You can? How?

    FORGIVE JOE. THEN I'LL FORGIVE YOU. THEN THE HATE
AND SIN WILL BE  JOE'S PROBLEM AND NOT YOURS...YOU MAY LOSE THE MONEY, BUT YOU WILL SETTLE YOUR HEART.

But Lord, I can't forgive Joe.

    THEN I CAN'T FORGIVE YOU.

Oh, you're right! You always are. And more than I
want revenge on Joe, I want to be right with you.... All right!  I forgive him.  Help him to  find the right road in life, Lord. He's bound to be awfully miserable, now that I think about it. Some way, some how, show him the right way.

THERE NOW! HOW DO YOU FEEL?

 Hmmm... not bad. Not bad at all, In fact I feel
pretty great. You know, I don't think I'll have to go to bed uptight tonight for the first time since I can't remember. Maybe I won't be so tired from now on because
I'm not getting enough rest.

    YOU'RE NOT THROUGH WITH YOUR PRAYER..GO ON.

Oh, alright.....And lead us not into temptation, but
deliver us from evil.

    GOOD...GOOD. I'LL DO THAT. JUST DON'T PUT YOURSELF IN A PLACE WHERE YOU CAN BE TEMPTED.

What do you mean by that?

    QUIT HANGING AROUND THE WRONG PLACES, WATCHING  INAPPROPRIATE MOVIES  AND TELEVISION, LISTENING TO SINFUL CONVERSATIONS; HANGING AROUND
THE  PLACES WHERE PLAYBOY AND PLAYGIRL ARE SOLD. CHANGE SOME OF YOUR FRIENDSHIPS. SOME OF YOUR SO-CALLED FRIENDS ARE BEGINNING TO GET TO YOU.
    THEY'LL HAVE YOU COMPLETELY INVOLVED IN WRONG THINGS  BEFORE LONG. DON'T BE FOOLED. THEY ADVERTISE THEY'RE HAVING FUN, BUT FOR YOU IT WOULD BE RUIN.
DON'T USE ME FOR AN ESCAPE HATCH.

I don't understand.

    SURE YOU DO, YOU'VE DONE IT ..... LOTS OF TIMES. YOU
GET CAUGHT IN A BAD SITUATION, YOU GET INTO TROUBLE AND THEN YOU COME RUNNING TO ME.  "LORD, HELP ME OUT OF THIS MESS, AND I PROMISE YOU  I'LL NEVER DO IT
AGAIN."  YOU REMEMBER SOME OF THOSE BARGAINS YOU TRIED TO MAKE WITH ME?
 
Yes, and I'm ashamed Lord. I really am.

    WHICH BARGAINS ARE YOU REMEMBERING?

Well, when the guy next door saw me backing away
from the neighborhood bar.. I told my wife I was going to the store.. I remember  telling you, "Lord don't let him tell her where I've been. I promise I'll  be in church every Sunday."

    HE DIDN'T TELL YOUR WIFE, BUT YOU DIDN'T KEEP YOUR
PROMISE, DID YOU?
 

I'm sorry Lord, I really am. Up until now I thought
if I just prayed the Lord's prayer everyday, then I could do what I  liked. I didn't expect  anything to happen like it did.

    GO AHEAD. FINISH YOUR PRAYER.

Oh yes....For Thine is the kingdom and the power,
and the glory forever and ever. Amen.

     DO YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BRING ME GLORY? WHAT WOULD MAKE ME REALLY HAPPY?

 No, but I'd like to know. I want to please you. I can see what a mess I've made out of my life, and I can see how
great it would be to really be one of your followers.

    YOU JUST ANSWERED THE QUESTION.

I did?

    YES, THE ONE THING THAT WOULD BRING ME GLORY IS TO HAVE PEOPLE LIKE YOU TRULY LOVE ME. AND I CAN SEE THAT HAPPENING BETWEEN US. NOW THAT SOME OF THESE OLD SINS ARE EXPOSED AND OUT OF THE WAY... WELL, THERE'S NO TELLING WHAT WE CAN DO TOGETHER.

Lord, let's see what we can make of me, OK?

    YES, LET'S SEE.