An elderly gentleman went to the local drug store and asked the pharmacist for Viagra.
The pharmacist said "That's no problem. How many do you want?"
The man answered, "Just a few, maybe 4, but cut each one in 4 pieces."
The pharmacist said,
"That won't do you  any good." 
The elderly gentleman said, "That's all right. I don't need them for sex anymore as I
am over 80 years old.
I just want it to stick out far enough so
 I don't pee on my shoes."