Shani's Story

        Shani Delane Proctor was born in a small town in California on April 10, 1970.  She was a bright child and had a sunny disposition. For the most part, Shani did well in the schools that she attended. One of which was Briggs Elementary School, where her younger sister also attended.  It seemed to be a family tradition that the girls should go there, as her mother, her mother’s cousin Carol, her grandmother and great Aunt, and her great Grandparents attended it too.

        Shani was a popular kid with all of her peers.  She was very likable and made friends easily, so there were always kids coming over to play and spend the night.

        Her first experience with puppy love was actually quite funny.  The secretary of Briggs called one afternoon and asked for one of Shani’s parents to come down to the school for a meeting with the school councilor.  Her step-dad, Bob, who by the way was a really wonderful father to both of the girls, went down immediately to find out what the problem was, as he was always involved with the school and activities of both children.  Upon arriving at the school he ran into another one of the parents that he had done business with and Bob asked him what he was doing there.  The father of the boy involved in the incident just grinned and said, “The school called and asked me to come down right away.  Seems that my boy has a crush on your daughter!“

        Bob didn’t think it was too unusual because, the age Shani was at, the boys were starting to flock to her like bees to a flower. Perplexed and not quite sure what was happening, Bob went into the office for the meeting, where he found out that Shani was in the back room lying down with a stomach ache!  When he asked what was the matter he was told that she had been punched in the stomach by the boy in question and was mad as a hornet!  The school sent home the punchee and the puncher both.  That was her first experience with adolescent crushes.

        Bob laughed at the incident, but Shani didn’t seem to think it was that funny, and immediately wanted to enroll in the karate school in town, which she did after she was in high school.

        She did well in the first year of high school, until she discovered “the boy of her dreams”, then the grades went to the compost pile, if you know what I mean.  Love was the focus for a while, but as soon as she realized that she might not graduate with her class, she spent all of her time studying.  She made the grade and did graduate.  And at the Graduation Ceremony, she was the loudest and happiest kid in the whole place.  Everyone celebrated with her and for her, by cheering and whoopin’ and hollerin’ while she walked up to get her diploma.

        She was sooo very bright and we all knew she could do it and
encouraged her.  Her adopted aunt Charlene, who is a teacher, came and helped out by tutoring her in English, while her new step-father, Rick held her hand through the Math.  It was one of the happiest days of her life when she graduated.  She knew she had accomplished something of value, and she felt good about herself for it.  We were all really proud of her that day.

        Also in that same year Shani went out for the “Miss Santa Paula” pageant.  She worked very hard on her presentation and came in second.  Although she was disappointed, she did indeed carry it through with the style and grace which was a hallmark of hers.  And she made us all very proud!
 
                   Here is what she put on her application form:

Name:   Shani Delane Proctor   Age: 18   Birthplace:  Santa Paula, Ca.

School attended:  Santa Paula Union High School
 

Year of High School Graduation:  1988

Color of hair:  Light Brown Color of eyes:  Hazel

Have you ever been married or had a child:  Never!

Employer:  Round Table Pizza

List your hobbies:  Horseback riding, swimming, walking the dogs to the river bed.

Future ambitions:  To become an actress and singer.

Particular likes:  Read a good Stephen King thriller while cuddled up by a blazing fireplace.

Particular Dis-likes:  People who talk too much.  Drunk drivers.  People
being homeless and those that have no food, and a government that allows it to happen.

Favorite movies:  Robocop, The Untouchables, Bloodsport, Centennial
(the mini-series)

Favorite Television shows:  Cosby show, Cheers, Alf.

Favorite foods:  Pasta of all sorts.  (mainly junk food!)

Favorite place:  My home because it is roomy and safe there.

Most enlightening experience: At the Broadway with a few friends trying on goofy hats.

Favorite Music and musical group:  I like all types of music, but Toto is my favorite group.

Favorite pastime:  Spending time with my Grandmother and my boyfriend.

Favorite actor and actress:  Richard Chamberlain and Cher.

Favorite car:  A ‘57 Chevy or a ‘69 Camero.

Favorite book:  “Pet Cemetary” by Stephen King and the Bible.

Ideal evening:  A nice, quite evening at home in front of the fireplace with a few friends.

Favorite sports:  Softball, Soccer, Volleyball, and mostly Track and Field events.

What person do you look up to:  My mother.  She’s been more a friend than a parent in the last few years.

What are your future plans:  To eventually settle down and marry my
current boyfriend who is studying to be a police officer.

Why would you like to be Miss Santa Paula:  I feel I am able to represent the town that has and always will be my home.

Number of brothers:  0   Number of sisters: 1

        Shani came in second in the Pageant, and was somewhat disappointed, but determined to try again the next year.  By then she was to marry and settle down and was no longer interested.  We were all proud of her just the same.  I guess I should mention that her tastes somewhat changed also.  Especially in music.  She leaned heavily toward Stevie Nicks and Wynonna in those years.

        Shani was indeed loved by everyone!  I remember a time when, her adopted Aunt Charlene,  my very best and one of my oldest friends came over one summer with her twins...

        We have a large, fenced in, front yard which, at the time, had a swing set that my mother had bought for the kids.  During the summertime Charlene would come over and bring her twin girls.  We would sit and visit while the children played in the front yard on the swing set.  This one particular time, Shani was already on the swings and we let Charlene’s two girls go outside with Colleen, my youngest daughter, while we went to the kitchen to make lunch for everyone.
 
        Charlene went to call the kids in for their lunch and had just stepped out the front door to see one of her twins, Charmony, being launched into space from being hit by the swing Shani was on.  Of course Charmony was scared to death at the experience and screaming her little toddler head off!  Charlene was quite calm about the whole thing, while I, on the other hand, was white as a sheet and shaking!  Charlene, being a teacher was used to playground incidents and after looking over the offended child, proclaimed her to be sound as a ‘T-Bill’ and ‘fit as a fiddle’.  “She’s just a little shook up!  That’s all.” was what Charmony’s giggling mom had said.

        Shani was so anxious about the whole thing she kept saying to Charmony... and mind you, these were really little kids, “I’m sorry, Charmony!  Can I get you anything, Charmony?”  She was mortified that she had hurt someone, especially Charmony, who was so little.  It  scared her to death to think that she was responsible, even though Charlene and I told her repeatedly that it was an accident and that it wasn’t her fault.

        Right after Charlene had the twins, I would take Shani and go to her house to help her with them.  I remember Shani sitting on the floor at three and a half years old, in her favorite quilted bathrobe that her grandmother had bought for her, wanting to hold one of the babies and feed them.  Charlene of course would let her and she was so happy to bottle feed that tiny little baby in her arms!  She would smile and chatter to the tiny infant, while Char and I sat in the chairs right by her watching her.  It was really something that I will never forget! She was so good to both of those little babies and always wanted to hold them.  She really loved Charlene’s girls and told everyone that they were cousin’s, which if not by blood, then by love alone was true!

        Not long after Charlene’s twins were born, Shani had a little sister of her own to hold and play with.  She loved that baby so much. She would stand and look at her sleeping in her crib, and look up at me and say, “I can’t wait till she is my age!  I’m gonna teach her everything I know Mom!”  She was four at the time and was very proud of her little sister.

        For the most part they were inseparable.  It was very hard on Colleen when Shani went to High School and she was not in the same school anymore.  They were always very protective of each other and would defend each other if an outsider was involved.  At home it was a different story altogether!  They were typical kids and were always blaming each other for things that were amiss in the household.  If something was missing from one of their rooms, it was a sure bet that the other one would be blamed for it!  “Mom!” Shani would scream at the top of her lungs, “Colli stold  my eyeliner!!  Tell her to give it back!!  I’m gonna get you!  You little brat!”

        On and on it went like that all the time!  If one wasn’t screaming
complaints, the other one was!  There were times I thought, “I’m going
to loose my mind!”.  But one thing was for sure, they were normal teenage girls, and I loved them both so much!  What I wouldn’t give to have them screaming at each other now.

        Another one of my favorite stories about Shani, when she was growing up, was when she was sick.  She had a case of the flu and at the time my cousin Carol, who lived the little brick house behind ours, came over to check on how Shani was.  I had called her earlier and asked her if she would come over.  Carol was a nurse at the Santa Paula Memorial Hospital and worked in the intensive care unit.

        When Carol came in, Shani was lying on the couch in the living room watching TV, one of her favorite things to do.  She went over and put her hand on Shani’s forehead and said, “Gee, Shani!  You have a temperature!  Maybe we should give you some asprin.”  Shani looked up at her and said, “Yes, I think I should take some Bayer Asprin.”  Carol looked at her funny and asked her why she wanted Bayer Asprin and Shani replied,  “Because they have tested theirs and it’s better!”

        Well, of course we both cracked up!  Now it is one of Carol’s favorite stories about Shani when she was little.  Goes to show you that advertising works on children, so be careful what you let them watch!

                        This is one of Charlene’s favorite stories...

        One time I was talking to Char on the phone and Shani was about a year old, I think.  I can’t really remember for sure, but she hadn’t started to really talk yet.  Anyway, Shani loved to talk on the phone at a very young age, and when I was talking to Charlene she would reach for the phone.  This particular time I let her have it for a few minutes and she did the normal baby babbling into the phone, “ahk, a, ba, tata, maaaaaaaa, I can’t stand it!”  What??  I just looked at her in disbelief!  She handed me back the phone and toddled off.  I was dumbfounded.  All I could hear on the other end of the phone was Charlene cracking up!  She laughed so hard she had to hang up then came right over.  We spent the rest of the day following Shani around to see if she would do it again!  By the way, we never did figure out what it was she couldn’t stand...

        There are a lot of really good stories and memories that Shani left behind her.  I know her sister misses her terribly, and her grandmother, we all do.  I wish I had the talent to really do her justice when it comes to writing about her, but how can you paint a real life Angel with words?  It is just so hard sometimes to think that she is really gone from this life and we will never see her here in this world again.

        Those of us who knew her remember her as a beautiful, smart, lively, and talented human being, bubbling with laughter and full of life.  She shone brightly on the horizons of our lives, and the world is a sadder place with out her.  I have heard somewhere, that when a star shines the brightest, it is dying and ready to transit to another form of energy.  Shani was the brightest star I have ever known, and it must have taken alot of energy for her to be so full of life and love for everyone and everything.  It is no wonder that she left us so young... 

 

 Shani's story continues on the next page.