Advertising slogans in Japan use English words in the most outrageous ways, that often make no sense at all because the words are chosen, not for their meaning, but for their sound to the Japanese consumer.  This mangling of the Queen's English is called "Engrish," or, less frequently, "Japanglish." Here is your primer - Engrish 101:

"Active Generation" folding chair:
It makes you indeed satisfaction to move
your body in nature. Let's play in nature
until tired out in a sweat. All nature is
always good friend of human being. Enjoy
outdoor life.

Drink vending machine:
Enjoy refreshing drinks while having a
good time chatting.

Bread bag:
For your creative life.

Stationery store sign:
We sell a tasty life.

Tony Tanaka Eyebrow Template:
The newly devised "Eyebrow
Template" is topmost recommended to
whom unable brow as you wish. This is
much proud to rely on the theory and
analysis of eyebrow make-up leader, TONY
TANAKA. Anyone can brow alone easily and
speedy just as if professionals do so.

Peet's Yummy Honey Morning Omelette Pan:
It was a sunny fresh morning. Peet woke
up and smell yummy sweat honey from
kitchen. He jumped over bed and went into
kitchen. "Woh! Boy! Bunches of pancakes!
Mommy, put prenty of honey onto pancakes.
OK?  I love your hand-made pancakes and
yourself, Mom!"

Xie's World Milk Caramel Box:
At the night, let's have night walk under the
shower of New Torino! But you have to be
careful at Halloween night, because you
don't know what's happening! Especially
around the construction work, and at the
corner you just got to turn . . . something
look so horrible must be waiting for you!

Holiday Land Picnic Box:
It was a beautiful holiday. There was a
natural park right across the green field. I
was going to take you to this special place.
The trees were swinging in the wind. Where
nothing standed in our way. We found a
lovely bird. The bird was singing merrily
among the green leaves. We stayed there
all day. And we both got us some real good
suntans. I thought that was ok. Sometimes
life can be so grand.

Tea Cups Harmony File Folders:
Sometimes, on my better days, I tend to
wake up feeling just like a princess who
lives in quaint little castle on an island off
the coast of Great Britain, and there's this
scrumptious butler who brings me my
morning tea in bed.

T-shirt label:
We created this shirt to have good
enjoyment. It's fine, we think. Is that all
there is?"

Shorts label:
Don't you wish to be in that place again,
where we sat and watched the blue sea.
Wasn't it good?

Nagano Toy Shop Window:
What a good time he'll give you if you
nourish every inch of him.

Asahi Orange Drink:
Your Joyful Drink

This is not quite Engrish, but while we're talking about mangling of English .. forwarded by Bob Halpin .. the transcript to a telephone exchange between an American  hotel guest and room-service, at a Japanese hotel. It was recorded and published in the Far East Economic Review.   This is a TRUE STORY, folks .. I don't make these things up!

Room Service: "Morny.  Ruin sorbees."
Hotel Guest:   "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service."
Room Service: "Rye...Ruin sorbees..morny!  Djewish to oder sunteen??"
Hotel Guest:   "Uh .. yes .. I'd like some bacon and eggs."
Room Service: "Ow July den?"
Hotel Guest:   "What??"
Room Service: "Ow July den? .. pry, boy, pooch?"
Hotel Guest:   "Oh, the eggs!  How do I like them?  Sorry, scrambled, please."
Room Service: "Ow July dee bayhcem .. crease?"
Hotel Guest:   "Crisp will be fine."
Room Service: "Hokay.  An San tos?"
Hotel Guest:   "What?"
Room Service: "San tos.  July San tos?"
Hotel Guest:   "I don't think so."
Room Service: "No?  Judo one toes??"
Hotel Guest:    "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo one toes' means."
Room Service: "Toes!  toes! .. why djew Don Juan toes?  Ow bow singlish mopping we bother?"
Hotel Guest:   "English muffin!! I've got it!  You were saying 'Toast.' Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine."
Room Service: "We bother?"
Hotel Guest:   "No, just put the bother on the side."
Room Service: "Wad?"
Hotel Guest:   "I mean butter .. just put it on the side."
Room Service: "Copy?"
Hotel Guest:   "Sorry?"
Room Service: "Copy .. tea .. mill?"
Hotel Guest:   "Yes.  Coffee please, and that's all."
Room Service: "One Minnie.  As ruin torino fee, strangle ache, crease baychem, tossy singlish mopping we bother honey sigh, and copy .. rye??"
Hotel Guest:   "Whatever you say."
Room Service: "Tendjewberrymud."
Hotel Guest:   "You're welcome."