The Retropoet

>The following was written by State Representative Mitchell Kaye from
>Cobb County, GA.
>"We, the sensible people of the United States, in an attempt to help
>everyone get along, restore some semblance of justice, avoid any more
>riots, keep our nation safe, promote positive behavior and secure the
>blessings of debt-free liberty to ourselves and our great-great-great
>grandchildren, hereby try one more time to ordain and establish some
>common sense guidelines for the terminally whiny, guilt-ridden,
>delusional and other liberal, bedwetters. We hold these truths to be
>self-evident: that a whole lot of people were confused by the Bill of
>Rights and are so dim that they require a Bill of No Rights.
>ARTICLE I: You do not have the right to a new car, big screen TV or any
>other form of wealth. More power to you if you can legally acquire them,
>but no one is guaranteeing anything.
>ARTICLE II: You do not have the right to never be offended. This country
>is based on freedom, and that means freedom for everyone - not just
you!
>You may leave the room, turn the channel, express a different opinion,
>etc., but the world is full of idiots, and probably always will be.
>ARTICLE III: You do not have the right to be free from harm. If you
>stick a screwdriver in your eye, learn to be more careful, do not expect
>the tool manufacturer to make you and all your relatives independently
>wealthy.
>ARTICLE IV: You do not have the right to free food and housing.
>Americans are the most charitable people to be found, and will gladly
>help anyone in need, but we are quickly growing weary of subsidizing
>generation after generation of professional couch potatoes who achieve
>nothing more than the creation of another generation of professional
>couch potatoes.
>ARTICLE V: You do not have the right to free health care. That would be
>nice, but from the looks of public housing, we're just not interested in
>health care.
>ARTICLE VI: You do not have the right to physically harm other people.
>If you kidnap, rape, intentionally maim or kill someone, don't be
>surprised if the rest of us want to see you fry in the electric chair.
>ARTICLE VII: You do not have the right to the possessions of others. If
>you rob, cheat or coerce away the goods or services of other citizens,
>don't be surprised if the rest of us get together and lock you away in a
>place where you still won't have the right to a big-screen color TV or a
>life of leisure.
>ARTICLE VIII: You don't have the right to demand that our children risk
>their lives in foreign wars to soothe your aching conscience.  We hate
>oppressive governments and won't lift a finger to stop you from going to
>fight if you'd like. However, we do not enjoy parenting the entire world
>and do not want to spend so much of our time battling each and every
>little tyrant with a military uniform and a funny hat.
>ARTICLE IX: You don't have the right to a job. All of us sure want all
>of you to have one, and will gladly help you along in hard times,  but
>we expect you to take advantage of the opportunities of education and
>vocational training laid before you to make yourself useful.
>ARTICLE X: You do not have the right to happiness.  Being an American
>means that you have the right to pursue happiness - which by the way,
is
>a lot easier if you are unencumbered by an overabundance of idiotic
laws
>created by those of you who were confused by the Bill of Rights."

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