Lie down and relax.
L-i-e-d-o-w-n-a-n-d-r-e-l-a-x.
R*E*L*A*X.
Relax ?!? How on Earth am I supposed to relax in the middle of all that noise ? One more minute on this beach from hell and I swear, I'll start running around in a frenzy and eventually end up killing someone...
Preferably Kakarotto.
Ok, one more time. Lie down and relax. Lie down and relax. Lie down and relax...
"Vejita..."
Now what ? I was almost getting there...
"Hmm ?"
"Who was that ? "
Uh oh.
"Who was who ...?"
"You know, the guy you made friends with when Chichi san and me were talking to the receptionist .... "
I knew it. I should've strangled him. This is what I get for repressing my survival instincts.
"No idea who you're referring to."
Ugh. Fairly unconvincing.
"Well, you should remember, you shook his hand !"
I did...I did what ? Excuse me for not recalling it the same way, but he ran into me. He dared to address me. He polluted the air I breathed and violated the space I peacefully dwelled in. And he most certainly was the one who grabbed me like a clingy little crab in need of prey.
But the words suddenly slip out.
"Oh, you mean Dilbert ?"
Hello ? Anyone up there ? Brain to Vejita, brain to Vejita. Connection terminated.
"Vejita ?"
Woman, can't you see I'm busy ? I'm learning the difficult yet thrilling art of sitting on my ass and do nothing all day long. Believe me, it's a mind-boggling activity.
"Nan da ?"
"Turn over."
"Naze da ?"
"I have to put some sunscreen on you."
No way I'm gonna let you splatter that drippy stuff on me.
"No."
Ah, finally. My mouth and my brain seem to be working in sync again.
As if it'd really make a difference.
"Don't be such a baby ! " Bulma insists. "You're gonna get a sunburn !"
"Saiyajins don't get---"
She rolls me over. I'm protesting loudly now, but apparently, my body has been left out of the mouth/brain equation.
So here I lie, at the mercy of her hands, while the people around us watch impassively as I'm being molested by my own mate.
APESP.
Stands for Association for the Protection of Endangered Saiyajin Princes. I'll work on it as soon as we get home. That is, if I make it through this week in one piece.
Woman...Not so hard. I said Saiyajin, not doormat.
"Papa ! Papa ! Mite yo !"
My daughter happily drags me by the hand, and I follow her with unquestioning obedience. I've long ago given up on attempting to resist her.
"Look !"
Look... where ?
"It's a sand flower !" Bra says proudly. "We did it all by ourselves !"
My gaze slowly descends upon Pan, who's digging little holes in the sand next to...
Oh my. I believe it's safe for me to say that this is by far the ugliest flower I've ever seen.
Kakarotto.
Buried up to his chin.
And still grinning.
"Sa...te...to...Yeah, *it* looks very nice."
It.
I suddenly feel hours of frustration and resentment re-emerge. And boy am I glad I just found *something* to take it out on.
It.
You know what ? I think *it*'s hungry. Flowers don't usually get hungry ? Well, this one is a carnivorous plant. Look at it. See ? It's got teeth and it's wriggling a little...Pan, go ask your grandmother for a chicken leg. We're gonna feed *it*. That's right, stuff it in *its* big mouth... Hey, maybe we should water *it*.The whole bucket. And maybe another one. Go ahead Bra, soak *it* well. It's so hot out here, you girls don't want *it* to dry up and die, now, do you ?
By the way, does anyone have some insecticide ? Oh, don't worry, your pretty flower isn't sick at all. It's strictly for prevention purposes.
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