Deakin Delectables Collectables Lifesize Blow up Deakins (with blow valve in handy position) Man of Action Doll (with matching suits and ties) Stick-to-your-Ceiling Deakins (endless possibilties)

When you want a detective with style and class

There's one man for the job who cannot be surpassed,

In case you are wondering of who I am speakin'

It's the adorable, witty, superb DI Deakin!

If you don't really go for the man in a suit

Then try him in civvies, he's equally cute.

But you never can go past his wonderful ties,

Especially the ones that go with those eyes.

He has such charisma, such nouse and such flair,

You just want to run your hands through his thick sandy hair.

And have you ever dreamed that he could be yours?

For just an hours debriefing behind those sliding doors....

Or wondering, lusting, planning just how -

You'd like him to say "Sal*, my office, now!"

But to be his superior is something I'd love,

Cause it's been such a long time since he called a girl Guv'!

(Insert your name here)