Aaaaah!  Boy groups.  Every five years or so, boy groups make a come back...smooth choreography, good boy charm, bulging pecs and cute looks...today's batch are no exception.  Unfortunately, the producers who manufacture boy groups spend so much time working on what the boys should be like, that they forget to change the formula...all the groups end up as practical carbon copies of one another:  On that note,

When exposed to boy bands, Drink when:

• the members could be interchanged with members from any other boy group
• members fit into the five stereotypes (the cute one, the hot one, the young one, the sweet one, the wild one)
• have corny names
• learn to play one of their songs as an actual band in concert
• wear the Madonna headsets in concert
• the wild one has tattoos/dredlocks...2 drinks if both
• muscles
• members point at the camera/audience homey style...
• fan base consists almost entirely of screaming girls between the ages of 7 and 17
• the age difference between band members and fans is disturbing (a 26 year old guy preaching his "love" to a 9 year old girl?  I thought that was ILLEGAL?!)
• One member is a couple of years older than the rest of the group
• One member is a couple of years younger than the rest of the group
• 2 drinks if the young one is blond!
• members bop around with their arms stretched out
• group claims that they are completely different to any other boy group (2 drinks if their manager manages another successful boy group)
• wear really baggy pants
• wear tight tops
• dance in a line
• corny dance moves
• point at camera with sincere look on face...2 drinks if other hand is on heart
• music is synth based
• lyrics are WONDERFULLY ELOQUENT...(SARCASM! "Just tell me your problems, I'll try my best to kiss them all away"...ooh! that's a good lyric!)
• one member looks kinda sleazy
• harmonies sound a little weak live
• try to go for teen crush appeal by baring their well developed pecs
• have open shirts...2 drinks if wet
• costume changes like crazy
• lyrics contain terrible grammar
• lyrics are of the "if you were my girl I'd..." type 2 drinks if they are meant to pull on the heart strings of young girls
• one group member has a wife or girlfriend, but it's kept secret
• at least one member is a complete pretty boy
• questionable harmonies
• at least one member has a ponytail
• they claim to have got together themselves...2 drinks if they were actually manufactured
• crucifix is worn...2 drinks if crucifix is around the neck of a wet man with an open shirt who is rubbing his chest in a suggestive manner
• one member doesn't appear to do very much...2 drinks if it's the oldest member
• one of the dance moves involves sliding from side to side with back to the audience
• the song is an "I want to do you girl" aka SLOW SONG
• the song is a "Get up and party" aka FAST SONG
• they say their names in one of their songs (one drink per mention of group's name, 2 per mention of individual's names)
• are easily parodied
• come up from nowhere and sell a pile of records before anyone over 20 has really heard of them
• could be described as "All American Boys"...2 drinks if they are not american
• Do the things good/wholesome boys should do in their videos (play pool, play basketball etc.)
• Someone faints at a concert
• the song starts with "Oh My God!" or something similar
• lyrics are easy to alter (Everybody...rock your buddy...in the back, all right)
• dancing consists mainly of pelvic thrusts
• wear "wife beater tank tops" aka white undershirts
• baseball caps (2 drinks if backwards or sideways!)
• athletic gear
• Tommy Hilfigger gear
• one has initials for a name
• 2 members are related somehow (2 drinks if they are brothers)
• "God" comes into it somehow
• members have small patches of chest hair
• you question at least one member's sexuality
• they wear matching outfits
• dance routine has kicking in it
• over "acting"
• suggestive dancing
• cheezy facial hair
• cheap pyro effects
• american flag sweaters
• at least on member is preppy