| Quiet, Retracing |
| Quiet (Written for an ex) Sitting here in the deepest despair of my life, my thoughts turn to the both of you, how you've both impacted my life in ways that could have never been imagined. My thoughts run from marriage and love to hatred and disbelief. My eyes following your car until it's out of sight while tears stream from my eyes. Holding it back, as best as I can...I turn...turning back to my home where you both had been only moments ago. Looking at the scene that surrounds me, I long for you both again. My heart sinks knowing that it will be some time before the sight of you both stand before me again. My heart set out, from the strength of you, to please myself. Listen to you, you tell me...follow where my heart takes me. And yet again, back to where I shouldn't be, I'm standing before the two of you, asking, begging, and pleading. This is where my heart belongs. Two people who I have allowed to touch me in ways that I hadn't ever imagined. "Casual" is our word here but my heart says "Love". I repeat, listen to yourself, follow where my heart takes me. On this Monday, I set out for my mission. My journey of fate. Where it will take me, only the Goddess to know. Marking this day, forever on the calendar for the world to see both my pain and the start of my new life in which I will set out for. Wherever it takes me, whatever my heart has to go through, wherever my tears may fall, they fall for the both of you. Where my place is, I have not yet learned, where my heart is I learned years ago. To not regret, to let go of fear, to not be scared...I am setting out. Brining forth to these two people I love, my true self. My timidness, my fears, my heart, my soul, all of my wild dreams....slowly becoming my truth by way of you. I spoke my words and handed my heart over for the two of you to divide and take it where you wish. My trust is given, wheather it should be there or not, wheather it's been proved or not. It is given. Love knows no boundaries so; I will not force myself to set them. Going for my dreams, setting out goals, and putting them into action. It's time to make me "happy" in every sense of the word. Happy to cry, happy to love, happy to give, happy to receive. However, what is happiness? An emotion, a thought, a dream, the future? I know, happiness is brought from within oneself, yet can be drawn upon from outside sources. Quiet for now, of my thoughts for my life. Quiet for those not to have to try to understand. Quiet for those who ridicule me of my thoughts. Quiet to be safe. Quiet to not be hurt. Quiet so that my mind is. |
| Retracing (Written for a crush I had) Retracing steps in my mind I hear your voice. Whispering ever so softly to me, telling me to take charge and to live my life for me. Retracing the memories in my mind I see your face. Soft and sweet with such tender lips. Whispering ever so softly to me, showing me the love within my soul. Retracing the love in my heart I feel your touch. Pure and easy. Moving over my body like velvet in the wind. Retracing the years of my life I feel your heart. Strong and content. Slowly learning to beat for me as mine has done for you. Feeling a sense of hopelessness, a sense of being lost, I have seen it all though your eyes again. Through the love in your voice and the tenderness in your heart. Through the years you have always been there without ever having shown your presense to my face until a few short years ago. My love for you goes so deep into my heart that most do not even see it. Hiding all of my feelings until the right moment to burst. Screaming my thoughts. Begging for your love in return. Asking you to stand next to me for the rest of my life. Turning to not show my tears, as you do not return what I wanted.... Retracing steps in my mind I hear your voice. Whispering ever so softly to me, telling me to take charge and to live my life for me. Retracing the memories in my mind I see your face. Soft and sweet with such tender lips. Whispering ever so softly to me, showing me the love within my soul. Retracing the love in my heart I feel your touch. Pure and easy. Moving over my body like velvet to the wind. Retracing the years of my life I feel your heart. Strong and content. Slowly learning to beat for me as mine has done for you. |