The Narn Regime

"The No-Name Minister Dude": I heard a new joke today--What is more dangerous than a locked room full of angry Narns?
Vir: I don't know, what IS more dangerous than a locked room full of angry Narns?
"Minister": One angry Narn...with the KEY!
--Sic Transit Vir

The Narns are the most fierce enemy of the noble Centauri Republic. Sure, our habit of kicking every race's butt we come across just for the fun of it (oh, and we also take their planets) has gotten us more than a few enemies, but whenever anybody thinks of the race that is the oil to the Centauri water, the ice to the Centauri fire, they think of the Narns.
The enmity between the Narns and the Centauri goes back at least 100 years. That's when we first conquered them. We thought of them as a backward and primitive people (as we still do), although they do have space travel at least, I suppose that gets them a few points. They broke off in 2257 or thereabouts, then promptly started trying to conquer US, attacking some of our outer colonies (i.e. "Midnight on the Firing Line"). Yeah, RIGHT. I'm so sure. Don't tell us how to do it, guys, we are THE conquering race. I mean, WHO once owned an entire QUADRANT of the galaxy? Not the Narns.
Examples of this enmity can be seen all through Babylon 5--as with (again from "Midnight") that famous strangling scene with Londo and G'Kar. Although by the end of the fourth season (which is as far as I've seen) they seem to be coming to a bit of an understanding.
Physically, the Narns, as you can see from the two pictures above (male on the left, female on the right) are a chunky, muscular people that despite their leathery skin and rather reptillian appearance, are actually mammals. They are MARSUPIALS. The females HAVE the babies as tiny little underdeveloped things and then the MALES carry them in their pouches until they are developed enough to survive outside it (for anyone who didn't know how marsupials work). They call their young "pouchlings". The family is considered to be everything to a Narn and they practically always marry for love.
Culturally, well, I don't know very much about Narn culture, but I'll repeat what little I do know here.
First of all, their main god (or prophet or Saint, or what have you, I'm not really sure) is named G'Quan. The Book of G'Quan is basically their "Bible" and it MUST be read in its original Old High Narn; to translate it is to strip it of its meaning and beauty. (Kind of like the Koran for the Muslims--it can't be translated from Arabic.) They have ranks in their society called "Circles". I THINK the LOWER the number, the higher your rank, with the First Circle being the leaders of the entire society, but I'm not sure. Evidently the Circles, while they do pretty much decide things like where you can live and what kind of jobs you can have, etc, are not QUITE the same as castes, because if you work hard (and, truth be told, indulge in a little blackmailing and scheming that would ALMOST be on par with the antics of Centauri children) WILL get you higher. If you play your cards right, you can move around within the Circles, unlike with a true caste system. They also appear to have an equivalent of an "untouchables" level, called "The Lost", consisting of the homeless, the clanless, and other undesirables.
Going further into the dark side of their society--they have a professional assassin's Guild, the Thenta Ma'Kur, who's trademark is that they always leave a black flower, or "death blossom" near their victim shortly before they are to kill her so that she will know she is about to die and have time to get her affairs in order. The Thenta Ma'Kur are very very efficient but also very prideful--so if an assassin fails to carry out her contract, she will be KILLED by the other assassins very shortly, to cover up the embarrassing gaffe and protect the Thenta Ma'Kur's reputation.
They are a warrior culture, very tough, used to harsh conditions and having a high regard of honour. (Kinda like the Klingons, except even uglier). Their home planet is a stark, rocky, rugged affair with a red sky. I think they also like higher temperatures than Humans, at least it always SEEMS to be rather smoky in G'Kar's quarters. They use swords that look rather like old Japanese Katana blades for ritual combat. (Those are the straight Samurai-type swords with the very narrow, round hilts by the way).
Last but not least, they can have an evil and sarcastic sense of humour and make up very SILLY little songs that clash completely with the tough rest of their culture. They decorate things rough, stark, and spartan, the exact OPPOSITE of the luxurious, overdecorated Centauri aesthetic. No WONDER they don't get along...However, they do seem to enjoy a good drink just as much as we do.
Well, that's all I can think of about the Narns for now (and it turned out to be a good bit more than I THOUGHT I knew) so until later, this is Lady Keela Shanri, saying--Valtoo!




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