Yes, that’s right, I said “choice”.
What? Did you think I was stupid enough to turn my back on an enemy that wasn’t dead yet? Especially with Legato being what he was...
Or did you really think that I had come to believe in your way of doing things?
I don’t, but I respect you for it, especially since you seem to be able to pull it off much of the time.
I’d known for a while that it would come to this, that’s why I kept trying to leave in the beginning; but I knew even as I left that my path would lead me back to you.
It was inevitable.
It seemed that in the end I would only end up betraying someone.
Betraying Knives would mean betraying the children... I couldn’t do that... But following Knives’s order to kill you would ultimately mean betraying everyone on Gunsmoke; you’re the only one who even stands a chance against Knives.
“Caught between a rock and a hard place...” That is the saying, ne?
There was only one way...
...only one choice...
If I died, I wouldn’t have to betray anyone.
Iie, that’s not completely true.
I’d still be betraying you...and betraying myself.
You will blame yourself for this; and because I told you where to find your brother, revealed that I know him, you will always doubt me...my intent, my words, my actions, my feelings...you won’t know how much of it was me, and how much was my “job”.
Gomen ne, Tongari...
There are no words to express how much I regret the way things played out; the choices that I made that led me to this final decision...
And the most ironic part is that this was all part of His plan. He doesn’t want you dead. He knew I couldn’t kill you; I’m sure Legato had orders to kill me if I tried.
Going back is impossible.
Trying to find another way out is futile.
For me, there is only death.
...
Somewhere, Knives is laughing
Feed the Muse!