story about her then four-year-old daughter. On the way
to preschool, the doctor had left her stethoscope on the
care seat, and her little girl picked it up and began playing
with it. Be still my heart, thought my friend, my daughter
wants to follow in my footsteps! Then the child spoke into the instrument: "Welcome to McDonalds. May I take your order?"
"I'm Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter." Her mother told her
this was wrong, she must say "I'm Jane Sugarbrown." The
Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School and said, "Aren't you
Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter?" She replied,
"I thought I was, but mother says I'm not."
with the boys?" Her mother replied, "No, you can't play
with the boys, they're too rough." The little girl
thought about it for a few moments and asked, "If
can find a smooth one, can I play with him."
For several evenings at bedtime she repeated it after
her mother. One night she said she was ready to solo.
The mother listened with pride as she carefully
enunciated each word, right up to the end of the
prayer. "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed,
"but deliver us some E-mail, Amen."
on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to
be quiet in church?" One bright little girl replied,
"Because people are sleeping."
fascination, he looked at old pages as he turned them.
Then something fell out of the Bible and he picked up and
looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree
that had been pressed in between pages.
"Momma, look what I found," the boy called out.
"What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked
With astonishment in the young boy's voice he
answered: "It's Adam's suit!!
to the altar wearing a beautiful dress. As the children
were sitting down around the pastor, he leaned over and
said to the girl, "That is a very pretty dress.
Is it your Easter dress?" The girl replied almost
directly into the pastor's clip-on mike, "Yes and my
mom says it's a bitch to iron."
mid-afternoon, she worried about her seven-year-old
daughter who would be walking the three blocks from
school to home. Deciding to meet her, the mother saw her
walking nonchalantly along, stopping to smile whenever
lightning flashed. Seeing her mother, the little girl ran to
her, explaining happily, "All the way home,
God's been taking my picture."
"Boys and girls, what do we know about God?" A hand
shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten
boy. "Really? How do you know?" the teacher asked.
"You know Our Father, who does art in Heaven..."
asked, "How many animals went into the Ark?"
The youngster replied: One mail and one e-mail.
Christmas dinner. The family members bowed their heads
in expectation. He began his prayer, thanking God for
all his friends naming them one by one. Then he thanked
God for Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, Grandma,
Grandpa, and all his aunts and uncles. Then he began
to thank God for the food. He gave thanks for the turkey,
the dressing, the fruit salad, the cranberry sauce, the pies,
the cakes, even the Cool Whip. Then he paused, and
everyone waited and waited. After a long silence, the
young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, "If I
thank God for the broccoli, won't he know that I'm lying?"
for the first time. The church lights were lowered
and then the choir came down the aisle, carrying
candles. All was quiet until the little one started
to sing in a loud voice, "Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you....."
crying full force. "Where'd we get him, mom?" he asked.
"From Heaven," the mother answered. The little
boy wrinkled his nose and covered his ears with his hands
and state matter-of-factly, "This is probably why they
didn't keep them there!"
