hit the reload button. Thank you for your patience, it will be worth it, I promise!
5/7/90 - 3/24/98 ~
All I can say is that I miss you so desperately
That I cannot even begin to put it into words.
So many things that are happening here,
And I want to have you here as a part of them,
If I can’t have that, then I just want to be with you now.
Your baby brother Mark is growing up to be alot like you,
In so many boyish ways.
We see so much of you in him,
But we realize that he just isn’t you.
Why oh why couldn’t we get to see you and Mark grow up together?
But having a baby to hold again was wonderful,
And I thank you for that beautiful gift.
Now Mark isn’t even a baby any more...
And my arms are empty again, and I am missing you even more.
Your “little” sister Rachel has now surpassed you,
In that she has made her first communion.
And I still keep asking, why couldn’t you?
And very shortly, Rachel will have outlived you,
My dear Christopher, how did that ever come to be?
And how do we ever cope with that milestone,
When it does get here?
Hugs and kisses from Rachel and Mark are so very sweet,
But without you, my first born, my little buddy, my life will never be complete.
This hole in my heart just cannot be filled
until you and I are together again, In sweet paradise...
Now your daddy has finally finished your “lego room,”
And it truly is a beautiful tribute to you.
But all I can see is what is missing --
I want so badly to see you with all of your legos in there...
There are some people who think that we have too many reminders of you here.
I do agree that it is painful at times to see
your toys, your clothes, your pictures,
And not be able to see you....
But I will never get rid of anything that was a part of your life,
It would be like losing you all over again.
Your things will stay with me until the wonderful day
that you and I are reunited.
And now again for your birthday this year,
your daddy and me and Aunt Jean and Uncle Billy will run fast,
Well, as fast as we can,
In your memory... the one thing you always wished you could do.
I just hope so much that you are running fast now, with the angels.
And that you will run fast with us too...
We all love you, Darling Christopher,
And we miss you much more than mere words could ever say.
Others keep telling us that you are always with us,
But I just want to feel your warm embrace and kiss your soft silky hair
And hold you in my arms forever and ever... for my love for you goes beyond forever...
From the bottom of our broken hearts,
We wish you a happy 11th birthday, Angel Christopher.
Written by Maria Faller, with alot of help from Christopher, I am sure of that!
April 30, 2001
~ IN LOVING MEMORY OF OUR COURAGEOUS LITTLE ANGEL~
this year. Click here to go to special gifts page Some Special Gifts From Friends
"FOREVER SEVEN"
You came to us such a little guy,
Just a little over 6 pounds or so,
And even though you were terribly sick,
Somehow you began to grow.
Your birthdays were such a celebration,
Everything seemed to go by so fast.
What was your future back then
Sadly now has become your past.
I love you, Christopher, with all my heart.
You really are the best!
But all our dreams and plans that we had
Have now been put to rest.
Today is the day you were born,
But my heart is broken in two.
There is nothing I would rather do
Than spend today with you.
But you will spend this birthday
And all the ones to come
In heaven with all of your angel friends,
For that is now your home.
And though I miss you with every breath,
There is nothing that I can do.
I have to stay and live this sad life,
Until I am called there, too.
In my heart you will remain
Until I am reunited with you in heaven.
In my heart and in my mind
You will remain "Forever Seven."
Written by Maria Faller,in loving memory of my son,
Christopher Faller, and dedicated here for his 11th birthday.
Concept borrowed from a poem written by Debbie Derosier,
in memory of her son Josh on his 15th birthday,
entitled "Forever Fourteen."
Precious Child
Precious child, precious child
In my mind, I see you clear as a bell
Precious child, precious child
In my soul, there is a hole
That can never be filled
But in my heart, there is hope
'Cause you are with me still
In my heart, you live on
Always there never gone
Precious child, you left too soon
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart
In my plans, I was the first to leave
Precious child, precious child
But in this world, I was left here to grieve
Precious child, my precious child
In my soul, there is a hole
That can never be filled
But in my heart there is hope
And you are with me still
In my heart you live on
Always there, never gone
Precious child, you left too soon,
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart
God knows I want to hold you,
See you, touch you
And maybe there's a heaven
And someday I will again
Please know you are not forgotten until then
In my heart you live on
Always there never gone
Precious child, you left too soon
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart
"My Love Is With You"
My love is with you
Oh, sweet son, what can I say?
My heart is empty without you each day.
The angel wings you wear must be so grand,
If only I could reach out and touch your hand.
Maybe then we could say good-bye
Which could help dry the tears that I cry.
Now I know that's impossible for us to do,
So let's make a deal, just me and you.
When I look to the stars at night,
You look for me with all your might.
When you see me just shine real bright,
And together we can send our love and say good night.
I miss you, son, more every day,
And the emptiness I feel will not go away.
You are my son and will always be,
My angel in heaven looking down on me.
You will live in my heart,
And I will try to be strong,
Because, my son, in my heart is where you belong.
I love you, son, sleep well, my son.
~ author unknown
"TO CHRISTOPHER"
The candles are lit,
But no song will be sung,
No laughter, no glee,
Of my little one
Who would have been ten.
If you only knew the plans
That would be made by your daddy and me.
The cake to be baked...
The presents wrapped and
All the funny party hats.
As loving friends fill the house.
All of this is not meant to be,
Since you were taken away from me.
No birthday cake...no presents unwrapped...
No pictures of you in your party hat.
But the candles are lit,
Never to go out.
For they burn forever in my heart.
We miss you so much on your birthday and always.
Love from mommy, daddy, Rachel, Mark and Shadow
that this Lego figure, called Chris ComLink,
has been named after him.
Remember I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glint on snow,
I am the new born babies cry,
I am the fluffy clouds in the sky,
I am the rainbow after the storm,
I am the fire that keeps you warm,
I am the colors of the sunrise at dawn,
I am the gentle baby fawn,
If you stand at my grave and weep,
You are not alone, I do not sleep.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle summer rain,
I am a small fragile sprout,
I am the deep green forest all about,
If you stand at my grave and weep,
Remember my spirit soars, I do not sleep.
I am not hungry or alone,
I am the scent of grass, freshly mown.
When you wake up in the morning, hush.
I am the swift uplifting rush,
Of quiet birds in circling flight,
I am the twinkle in an animals eye,
I am not gone my spirit is alive.
I am the gentle waves at the ocean shore
I love you forever and more
I am the light of the full moon
Remember, we'll see each other soon.
If you stand at my grave and weep,
Remember I'm not there, my spirit doesn't sleep.
OUR ANGEL BOY
We miss your beautiful brown eyes, so full of life...
Your joyous laughter, so wonderful to hear...
Your beautiful boyish smile...
Your warm and heartfelt embraces...
Your loving kisses...
Your way of being a boy through and through.
You had a tremendous amount of love in your little heart,
So when you left us, it tore us apart.
You loved your legos, your micro machines,
Your action figures, your army stuff...
Truly a boy through and through.
You brought us so much happiness in your short time here,
Even in times of trouble and in times of pain,
Your smile just kept shining on.
No more pain for you now,
But lots of pain for us in losing you.
Now you are in heaven, and I hope to see you soon.
With all my love, for always,
Mommy
Tammy Tobac, Tanner's mommy. It is hanging up on the wall here
where I can see it while I am at the computer.
Thank you so much, Tammy!
An Angel Waiting
A young boy quietly waits,
Patiently he watches for his family at the gate.
His brown eyes shine so brightly
As hope swells within.
For soon he'll see his loved ones
And never part again.
How joyous will be the meeting
As mother holds her child,
And father kisses softly
The angel -- his long lost child.
Once more they'll hold each other,
And tears will be no more.
Forever they'll be together
As they pass through Heaven's door.
And heartaches make a lane
We would climb the stairs to heaven
And bring you home again
But there is a bridge of memories
From here to heaven above
That keeps your memory close to us
Its called the bridge of love.
Remembering you is easy, we do it every day,
But missing you is heartache
That will never go away.
and courageous angel boy...
Two Very Special Angels * Christopher's Statue * Christopher's Courage
Dedicated to Chris * Christopher's Christmas Page * My Little Valentine
For Christopher's Heaven Day * Heartangels Special Days
Our Heartangels Newsletter, May 2000 Edition * Awards for Christopher
of Christopher Faller for his 11th birthday,
May 7th, 2001.
Last updated August 26, 2001
Thank you!
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