More Memories of Brian

Brian Weslyn Wall
January 3, 1990 - March 20, 2004

A million times we needed you
A million times we've cried
If love alone could have saved you
You never would have died.

In life we loved you dearly
In death we love you still
In my heart a place you hold
No one can ever fill.

It broke our hearts to lose you
But you did not go alone
A part of us went with you
The day God called you home.

You left us special memories
Your love is still our guide
And though we cannot see you
You are always at our side.

Our family chain is broken
And nothing seems the same
But as God calls us one by one
The chain will link again.
~ Author unknown

If Tomorrow Starts Without Me

If tomorrow starts without me, and I'm not there to see,
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
all filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldn't cry the way you did today,
While thinking of the many things, we didn't get to say.

I know how much you love me, as much as I love you,
And each time that you think of me,
I know you'll miss me too;
But when tomorrow starts without me, please try to understand,
That an angel came and called my name,
and took me by the hand,
And said my place was ready, in heaven far above,
And that I'd have to leave behind all those I dearly love.

But as I turned to walk away, a tear fell from my eye
For all my live, I'd always thought, I didn't want to die.
I had so much to live for, so much left yet to do,
It seemed almost impossible, that I was leaving you.

I thought of all the yesterdays, the good and the bad,
I thought of all the love we shared, and all the fun we had.
If I could relive yesterday, just even for a while,
I'd say good-bye and kiss you and maybe see you smile.
But then I realized, this could never be,
For emptiness and memories, would take the place of me.

And when I thought of worldly things,
I might miss come tomorrow,
I thought of you, and when I did,
my heart was filled with sorrow.
But when I walked through heaven's gates, I felt so much at home.
When God looked down and smiled at me, from His great golden throne,
He said, "This is eternity, and all I've promised you.
Today your life on earth is past, but here life starts anew.

I promise no tomorrow, but today will always last,
And since each day's the same way, there's no longing for the past.
You have been so faithful, so trusting and so true.
Though there were times you did some things
you knew you shouldn't do.
But you have been forgiven and now at last you're free.
So won't you come and take my hand and share my life with me?"

So when tomorrow starts without me,
don't think we're far apart,
For every time you think of me,
I'm right here, in your heart.
~ Author unknown

God's Loan

I'll lend you for a little time,
A child of mine, he said
For you to love while he lives
And mourn for when he is dead
It may be six or seven years
Or twenty-two or three.
But will you, till I call him back
Take care of him for me?
He'll bring charms to gladden you,
And should his stay be brief,
You'll have his lovely memories,
As solace for your grief.
I cannot promise he will stay
Since all from earth return.
But there are lessons taught down there
I want this child to learn
I've looked this wide world over
In my search for teachers true
And from the throngs that crowd life's lanes
I have selected you
Now will you give him all your love
Not think the labor vain,
Nor hate me when I come to call,
And take him back again
I fancied that I heard them say,
Dear Lord, thy will be done
The risk of grief we'll run.
We'll shelter him with tenderness,
We'll love him while we may
And for the happiness we've known
Forever grateful stay
But should the angels call for him
Much sooner than we planned
We'll brave the bitter grief that comes
And try to understand.
~ Author unknown

The Dragonfly

Once, in a little pond, in the muddy water under the lily pads, there lived a little water beetle
in a community of water beetles. They lived a simple and comfortable life in the pond
with few disturbances and interruptions.

Once in a while, sadness would come to the community when one of their fellow beetles
would climb the stem of a lily pad and would never be seen again. They knew when this happened;
their friend was dead, gone forever.

Then, one day, one little water beetle felt an irresistible urge to climb up that stem.
However, he was determined that he would not leave forever. He would come back and tell his friends
what he had found at the top.

When he reached the top and climbed out of the water onto the surface of the lily pad,
he was so tired, and the sun felt so warm, that he decided he must take a nap.
As he slept, his body changed and when he woke up, he had turned into
a beautiful blue-tailed dragonfly with broad wings and a slender body designed for flying.

So, fly he did! And, as he soared he saw the beauty
of a whole new world and a far superior way of life to what he had never known existed.

Then he remembered his beetle friends and how they were thinking
by now he was dead. He wanted to go back to tell them, and explain to them
that he was now more alive than he had ever been before. His life had been fulfilled
rather than ended.

But, his new body would not go down into the water. He could not get back
to tell his friends the good news. Then he understood that their time would come,
when they too, would know what he now knew. So, he raised his wings
and flew off into his joyous new life!
~ Author unknown

The Mention of His Name

"The mention of my child's name
May bring tears to my eyes,
But it never fails to bring
Music to my ears.
If you are really my friend,
Let me hear
the beautiful music of his name.
It soothes my broken heart
And sings to my soul."
~ Author unknown

Brian loved animals and was a great friend to many animals during his short life.
This is Brian with his pet ferret, Jake, that died a few months before him. He loved that Jake so much
and he had a chinchilla, named Chili, that died while we were having his funeral.
I thought that was very strange but maybe not. He also had a black Lab dog named Ace.
He loved animals and wrote a book when he was in the fifth grade about animals.

Angel Wings

At the ending of the day when I'm weary
After a waterfall of tears have all been cried
And I'm feeling like the skies will always be dreary
Nothing's there to fill the emptiness inside.

I lay my head upon my favorite pillow
Just close my eyes to block all the sorrow
wonderin' where I'll ever find the strength inside-
to do it all again- tomorrow.

And then I feel it-
inside me.
I feel it-
around me.
Like a gentle hand just wiped away the tears-
and held me close to wash away my fears.

It's you, my angel, watching over me.
And I know no matter what tomorrow brings,
You'll be here to wrap me in your angel wings-
your lovin' angel wings.

The sun comes up, it's time to face the day
and I think that things are going to be all right-
But as the day wears on my nerves begin to fray-
I feel the hollowness that creeps in every night.

And like clockwork all the tears begin to fall
As I look at my reflection in the glass-
the eyes looking back at me make me feel small-
and I ask, my God, how long's this going to last?

And then I feel it-
inside me.
I feel it-
around me.
Like a gentle hand just wiped away the tears-
and held me close to wash away my fears.

It's you, my angel watching over me.
And I know no matter what tomorrow brings,
You'll be here to wrap me in your angel wings-
your lovin' angel wings.

Thank God for your angel wings

Angel Wings
Beautiful Poetry � 2002 ~ Ellen M. DuBois