The Gospel Truth

The Gospel Truth I

Back when the world was new
The planet earth was down on its luck
And ev'rywhere gigantic brutes called
Titans ran amok

It was a nasty place
There was a mess wherever you stepped
Where chaos reigned and earthquakes
And volcanoes never slept

And then along came Zeus
He hurled his thunderbolt
He zapped
Locked those suckers in a vault
They're trapped
And on his own stopped chaos in its tracks
And that's the gospel truth
The guy was too type A to just relax

And that's the world's first dish
Zeus tamed the globe while still in his youth
Though, honey, it may seem imposs'ble
That's the gospel truth

On mt. Olympus life was neat and
Smooth as sweet vermouth
Though, honey, it may seem imposs'ble
That's the gospel truth
 

The Gospel Truth II

He ran the Underworld
But thought the dead were dull and uncouth
He was as mean as he was ruthless
And that's the gospel truth
He had a plan to shake things up
And that's the gospel truth
 

The Gospel Truth III

Young Herc was mortal now
But since he did not drink the last drop
He still retained his godlike strength
So thank his lucky star

But Zeus and Hera wept
Because their son could never come home
They'd have to watch their precious baby
Grow up from afar

Though Hades' horrid plan
Was hatched before Herc cut his first tooth
The boy grew stronger ev'ry day and
That's the gospel truth