Say It Isn't So
by Erin Driscoll (Aka, Crow)
*Twilight Zone music plays* Ever wondered what started Crow-chan’s fanfiction writing? Also started my yaoi obsession. Yep! My first fic ever! I happened to find it on one of my favorite sites..which finally updated with it ^^; So, this is my first fic..expect alot of crap and all >D The title doesn’t even go with the story o.o;; Anyway, read Crow's newbie-ness ^^
Disclaimer – Own fic, not Digimon or characters :P
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
This is a Taito fic which means its yaoi which also means its a boyxboy relationship. If you don't like that sorta stuff then don't read :P lol Digimon and the characters don't belong to me so don't sue! lol. I'm just using them for my own entertainment : P Ohhh...and I did this fic while listening to Say It Isn't So- by Bon Jovi (Crush). So it ended up being the title....the chorus goes pretty good with the story. It's looked at by two pint of views. One is matt's and the other is Tai's. '...' is for thoughts. Anyways, Enjoy the fic!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
~*~The Beginning~*~
It had been years since the Digidestined destroyed the Darkmasters. Tai, Matt, Sora, Izzy, Joe, and Mimi were alot older now. They were all finished school by now and were in their 16's. Kari and TK were still around, now in 8th grade, at the ages of 14. The old Digidestined had split up. most of them hadn't seen each other since then. Tai was still into soccer...but now he helped the smaller kids. Matt had given up his harmonica and had started a band. Sora wasn't into soccer anymore. She liked tennis and helped her mother with her flower shop. Izzy was still a 'computer nerd' but was as smart as ever. Joe was still working on becoming a doctor and Mimi had moved away to America. The only kids that saw each other regularly were TK and Kari because they were in the same class. They all had new friends, looked different, and had new interests. Little did they know they would soon meet again.
~*~Tai~*~
'Wow.....thats a long way down.' I was on the highest bridge in Tokyo. I looked down at the wavy water beneath me, my hair blowing in the wind. I stood there for a long time. A beeping sound brought me out of my trance. "Hmm? What's that?"
I looked down at the small Digivice that was hung on my belt buckle. It was beeping like it used to do in the Digiworld...when someone needed your help. 'But it hasn't done that in years....what does it mean? And how do I get back to the Digiworld?'
There was a rumble beneath my feet. I looked down in time to see a large black hole open beneath my feet. 'Oh great...' Everything after that went black. When I finally opened his eyes, I was in the Digiworld.
~*~Matt~*~
I yawned and plunked down on the couch. There wasn't much to do now that I was out of school. The only thing that kept me going was my band. I could sit home all by myself all day...with no one to keep me company. I had no one except my father. But somehow I knew I needed more. I needed someone to love me. Yes, with the band, many girls adored me, but only because I was in a band. They didn't love me for me. And thats what I was looking far...someone who loved me for *me*. Of course, I hadn't found that special someone. And thats what depressed me. I had gone out with many girls in the past few years. But all of them were hair, make up, clothes, and talk. They were all interested more in the band then me. My relationships lasted only weeks...maybe even days. It wasn't real love. And I knew it. I wanted someone who I could truly talk to- who knew me better than anyone else. Someone who would actually care about me and what I did. I had thought this over many times. Sometimes I wished we were still in the Digiworld. All of the other kids and their Digimon knew me well. There I was surrounded by people who knew and cared. But they were all gone now. I hadn't seen Tai in over a year- even though his sister was over here regularly with TK, visiting, no one spoke of him. I had seen him once since we left the Digiworld. That was when I passed the soccer field on the way to school. He had been playing soccer with a bunch of his buddies. I remember smiling and walking on. Tai-why was I even thinking of him? I forced myself to think about something else. 'I wonder how Gabumon is doing...' I hadn't seen him in the longest time. With that, I fell asleep.
~*~Later that Day~*~
"Hmmm" I groaned. 'I must have fallen asleep..' I managed to open my eyes enough to see that the sun was setting. It was around 7:00. Then all of my senses woke up and I realized that it was the phone that had woken me up. I slowly sat up and reached over to the coffee table to answer the phone.
"Hello?" I mumbled.
"Hi, Matt? Is that you? Its been so long..." It was a girl's voice but I couldn't figure out who.
"Who is this?" I asked.
"Its me, Sora."
"Ohh..Hi Sora. Sorry its been so long- I don't even recognize your voice."
"Its ok. I wasn't sure if it was you either."
"So, whats up? Why're you calling?"
"Somethings up-"
"Hmm? Whats going on?"
"Well, Tai-"
"Did something happen to Tai??" For some reason I was panicking. Why? I hated Tai- didn't I?
"No, no, hold your horses!"
"Heh...Sorry"
"I'm not sure...but Tai has called a meeting. It sounds really important."
"Oh well. If Tai called a meeting then its probably nothing. He probably lost a sock or something and needs us to find it."
"Matt-"
"Ok, ok. I'll go. Where to?"
"You know the big park in the middle of the city?"
"Yeah."
"Well meet us there as soon as possible. I'm heading there now."
"Ok."
"I'll see you there?"
"Mmhmm"
I hung up and headed towards the park.
~*~Park~*~
I thought I was going to e the last one to arrive but it turned out I was wrong. Everyone except Mimi and Tai were there. And since Mimi was in America, Tai was the only one late. I silently sat down on a swing next to Sora. Everyone was looking at each other, not knowing what to say.
"Wow....Mr. Big Shot isn't here yet." I snorted, breaking the silence.
"You mean Tai?" Asked Joe.
"Who else would I be talking about?"
"Are you guys still at it after all these years?" Asked Izzy.
We were interrupted by Kari, joining our group, giggling, with TK at her side. I recognized them right away. I had seen Kari alot over the past years. She hung around with my little bro. I wasn't sure if there was something going on- but they would have made a cute couple. That is, if Kari wasn't Tai's little sister. With that, I looked up to see an older person. It looked like Tai- but he was grown up and looked more mature. 'Is that Tai?'
"Sorry I'm late-" He started.
"Its ok, Tai." Said Sora.
'So, it is him.'
"As you know, I've called this meeting-"
"Duh.." I said under my breath.
Tai shot me a look. 'Those eyes are so beautiful-WHAT??? WHAT AM I THINKING??'
He continued to talk. I tried to listen- but my mind was wandering different places. He said something about new Digidestined and a Digimon Emperior. It was fine with me- but I couldn't get what I had thought out of my head. I looked at Tai again, who was pacing around, and felt warmth I had forgotten. What was it?
~*~Tai~*~
After meeting the new Digidestined, I called Sora and told her that we were going to have a meeting. She volunteered to call everyone and tell them about it. Kari emailed Mimi in America and told her what was going on. That was it- we were to meet in the city park in 10 minutes. I hung up the phone and looked out the window. We were up in our apartment and the sunset looked beautiful from our point of view. I loved to watch the sunsets- I've been doing it alot lately. For some reason I don't feel up to doing anything else. Its like something was missing. But I couldn't pick it out.
I guess I had been there a while because Kari and TK were going out the door when I finally snapped out of it.
"Tai? Are you coming?" Called Kari, over her shoulder.
"Wha-Yes."
I left my position and followed them. They chatted and giggled the whole way down the elevator. If I hadn't known any better, I would of thought they were a couple. It was ok with me- even though TK was Matt's brother. Matt- I hadn't seen him in a long time. I wondered if he had changed- or was he still the same old Matt. The one who was always ready to pick a fight with me. The one who always argued with me. The one with the adorable blue eyes....WAIT...where did that come from??
I snapped out of it in time to find myself on the bridge I was on earlier that day. Kari and TK were still ahead of me. I stopped to look over the side of the bridge. My hair rustled in the slight breeze. What was last of the sun was slowly sinking in the horizon.
"Tai- whats wrong?"
I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned my head to find Kari.
"Yeah....I'm ok."
"We're already late, C'mon."
She turned and walked back to TK, who was waiting for her. They continued their conversation and walked on. I took one last look at the sunset and trudged on.
Kari and TK arrived before me. I stepped into the clearing and memories flooded back. We were finally together again. Just like old times. Only one person was missing and she had a reason for not being there. I guess I interrupted something because they all had a strange look on their faces.
"Sorry I'm l-"
"Its ok." smiled Sora.
I smiled back. She had grown up alot since I last saw her. New clothes and she even matured.
Anyway, I decided to cut right to the chase.
"As you know, I called this meeting-"
I was interrupted by- you guessed it! Matt.
I glared at him. It was the first time I actually got to look at him. He had matured alot. His hair was longer and he wore different clothes. And those eyes- they were as blue as ever. I quickly shook my head of those thoughts and continued.
"I have some news. The Digiworld has reopened."
Sora, Joe, and the rest of the Digidestined looked at each other.
"Don't get too excited. We can't go back. They've called on new Digidestines with new Digimon. and there is a new evil there- the Digimon Emperor."
Sora looked at me. "So...we can't go back?" She asked quietly.
"Well, yes, we can. But not without the new Digidestined. They have special new Digivices. And only they can open the portal to the Digital World." Answered Izzy. "Tai was there today with them. A kid named Davis got his Digimon, Veemon. Two more kids named Yolei and Cody also got Digivices. They havn't received their Digimon yet. They didn't get a chance to go there yet. Kari and TK also went."
"I got to see Gatomon" Said Kari, happily.
Sora sat up. "Did you see Biyomon?"
The rest of the group joined in, talking and asking questions. I noticed that Matt didn't move. He seemed to be in his own little world. Even when I walked over to him, he didn't move. Just kept staring out into space. I kneeled down by his side and waved my hand in front of his face.
"Hey Matt- anyone home?" I snapped my fingers.
He finally snapped out of it. "What do you want?"
"Nothing....you were just spazzed out thats all. Whatcha thinking about?"
He was quiet for a moment. I thought he had spazzed out again. He finally spoke. "Nothing."
"Okay"
I got up, took one more look at Matt, and joined the rest of the group. I knew there was something wrong. But I wasn't think one to pick at him. I knew it would only start a fight. I joined in the conversation and soon forgot about it.
~*~Matt~*~
I got lost in my own thoughts I guess. What was going on in my mind? Thinking Tai's eyes were beautiful? Where did it come from? And where was this warmth coming from? I got no answers. It was up to me to figure out. But what was I supposed to do? What did it mean? The next thing I knew there was someone at my side, snapping their fingers. It woke me out of my trance. I looked to find Tai sitting close to me. I felt the warmth again.
"What do you want?"
"Nothing....you were just spazzed out thats all. Whatcha thinking about?"
What was I going to tell him? That I was thinking about him? That maybe I had feelings for him? I tried not to look at him. "Nothing."
"Okay."
He got up and joined the group. I was suprised. The old Tai would have asked more questions. We probably would have gotten into a fight. But it was different now- it was like he was a different person. I watched as he laughed and talked with the others. I gave into the truth. I knew I had felt this way before once in my lifetime. It was when we were in the Digiworld. I had always fought with Tai but it wasn't because I hated him- it was because I loved him. In the real world, many guys pick on the girls they like. And it was the same with me. Only I picked on a boy. And when we left the Digiworld, I knew I wouldn't be seeing him again. So I blocked it out of my mind. I forgot about him and the love I had towards him. And now that I had seen him again, the love had returned. As strong as ever. I looked over at Tai again. To me, his laughter was like an angel's voice. 'Man, I have to get out of here..' I turned my head away from him and got up. Walking in the opposite direction, no one noticed me leave. At least, I thought no one did.
~*~Tai~*~
I tried to join in the conversation but something was bugging me. I looked back at Matt a couple of times. He seemed in his own world, deep in thought. I saw him look at me and continue to think. I was wondering what was so interesting. Out of the corner of my eye I saw him get up and leave. I knew that I had to follow him. Something told me that I had to.
"Hey guys...I'm pretty tired so I'm going to call it a night."
We all said our good-byes and I headed off in the direction Matt went.
~*~Matt~*~
Matt kicked at the leaves on the ground. What was he going to do? He now realized that the emptiness he had felt before was for Tai. He could love no one else but Tai. But Tai probably hated me. I kicked at the leaves again. There was no way it could ever happen. I was doomed to suffer without feeling belonged to. Without being touched. Without being loved. How could I ever live this way? I kept my eyes on the ground and kept walking, unaware that I was being followed. I walked for what seemed like hours. When I finally looked up, I found myself on the bridge. It was the highest bridge in Tokyo so I knew where I was. I stepped up onto the small sidewalk and laid my arms down on the rail, and laid my head on them. I stared out into the night.
~*~Tai~*~
I guess he hadn't noticed me following him yet. I stayed quiet and hidden. Where was he going? He didn't look too happy. I wanted so bad to help him. But I couldn't. What was going through his mind? Was he thinking about the new Digidestined? Digimon? Maybe he was thinking about m- I wiped the thought from my head. He hated me. Didn't he? He always fought with me- argued too. My mind went back in time. Old feelings came back to me. I knew that I had been in love with him before- but was I still? I looked at him again. He had stopped on the bridge I had been on earlier. Was it faith? I watched as he slumped sadly on the rail. I decided then and there to tell him. I slowly came out of my hiding spot.
~*~Matt~*~
A dozen things were going through my head. I wasn't sure what I should do. I blocked out the outside world. I sure didn't hear anyone sneak up behind me- until I felt a hand on my shoulder. I came out of my daze to find Tai. I lifted my head, but kept my back to him. I didn't want to face him yet. No telling what I would do. In the romantic background, I probably would have kissed him. That would have ruined everything. I would never be able to face him again.
"Matt?" He asked quietly.
His hand was still on my shoulder. I was having a hard time concentrating.
"Are you sure you're okay?"
"Yes"
"You're not your usual self...I know theres something wrong."
Good ol' Tai. He was always there for me. But this was the time I didn't want him there. I was trying hard to hide my feelings. 'Pease Tai, please leave.' But he didn't. In fact, he let go of my shoulder and stood right next to me, looking at the moon. In the moonlight, his face was so beautiful- to me, he glowed like an angel. This made it even harder for me.
"Nothings wrong." I stated, my voice trembled a bit.
I knew I wouldn't last much longer.
"Tai-"
"The moon is really bright tonight."
Tai looked at me. I stared back. I quickly caught myself and tore away from his gaze. I pretended to be interested in the water below me. Its the perfect time....why can't I tell him? Because he might hate me for it. He didn't care about me. He was just trying to be helpful...wasn't he? My thoughts and emotions were all tangled up. I looked at him once more. He was still looking at me. What was he waiting for? I finally decided that I had to sort my feelings out by myself. And see what happens next. Tai finally looked away after a few moments of silence. "Listen, I've got to go. See you around?"
"Yeah."
With that, Tai headed back the way he came, on the way home. I mentally kicked myself. I watched as he disappeared into the night.
"Good night, Tai" I whispered.
~*~Tai~*~
I guess he was in such deep thought that he didn't hear me come up behind him. I put my hand on his shoulder, trying to comfort him.
"Matt?"
He stood up, but kept his back to me. I wished that he would turn around. But then again, I probably would of ruined what little friendship we had by admitting my feelings to him.
"Are you sure you're okay?"
"Yes"
"You're not your usual self...I know theres something wrong."
He didn't speak for a while. I took my hand off of his shoulder and stood beside him, enjoying the sight. The moon was so big. It was bright too.
"Nothings wrong."
I heard his voice tremble. Something was defiantly wrong with my Matt-Chan.
"Tai-"
I knew he was going to ask me to leave. I deliberately interrupted him.
"The moon is really bright tonight."
He looked at me and I looked at him. I could see pain in his eyes, but he tore them away from me before I could see any of his other emotions. I kept my eyes on him. In the moonlight, he looked like a guardian angel. Too bad he wasn't mine. After a few minutes of silence, I looked away. I didn't know what he was going through, but it was obvious that he didn't want to share his feelings with me.
"Listen, I've got to go. See you around?"
"Yeah."
I started my way over the bridge, head hung low. maybe he didn't care about me after all. I wasn't sure if I would ever find out, or if I would ever want to.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Part 1
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Say It Isn't So (Part 1)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
In Additional Notes – Feh..I just realized that this fic is like, almost 17 pages long o_0; That’s almost longer than any of my other fics...and I was a newbie when I wrote this o_o; Anyway, that’s not the point. I know that I had said that it was part one, and I did have part two, but its been deleted a long long long long time ago...so I’m not even going to try writing it again. Just forget that it ever had a sequel and pretend that it was just a normal fic at one time ^^; Y’never know..I wrote this fic out on paper...maybe one day I might plunk my ass down and write it again...someday ;D