If one were to look up the word "laxatives" in a medical encyclopedia or dictionnary, here's what it'd say: "Used to combat constipation (and sometimes overused, producing diarrhea)." The word “laxative” comes from the Latin “laxare” and means “to open, widen, extend, release” Laxatives are used to relieve occasional constipation.Not CHRONIC constipation! Sadly laxatives are frequently advertised with little or no mention of short or long term side effects laxatives can cause.When it comes to the issue of eating disorders, laxative abuse seems to take on a whole new meaning. Here's my little story about laxatives: how it affected me and how pissed I am. If only I knew...

I understand how desperate people with eating disorders are: we'd do EVERYTHING we possibly can to:

-relieve the tension;
-to feel safe;
-to feel a sense of control;
-to have something to hang onto;
-to lose weight;


We keep thinking "After we've lost Xlbs everything will be all peachy!

And,sadly,I got to a point where I was just so DESPERATE!!



See,that's the thing: you are quickly becoming addicted to those and no one's telling you. besides, you're not even realizing it, because, after all, all that matters,your ONLY reason for living at this point is losing weight: that's ALL you think about.And as time goes by, you find another alternative: purging. "Throwing up?What about it?Can't be THAT bad!" You started this, very innocently, just stick your fingers down your throat!But NOW,you're at a point where your hand doesn't work. "Oops!" you think to yourself..."But WHO CARES?" Right? You HAVE to do it, no matter what it takes!!I've got to a point where I had to stick my WHOLE fucking HAND down there..Think it mattered to me? Nah, I couldn't careless !

I didn't really want to do all those horrible things I did, but...I was just SO DESPRATE! Sorry, not being able to put it in words here, but I'm sure you can understand what I'm saying by desprate and how I N T E N S E this all is/was


It all started quite insidiously,very innocently.At first, I, as many people with eating disorders, didn't really care about the meaning and so, just went out and about, bought some.I began taking laxatives. At first, just a few...Their hideous effect happened,not without great deal of pain...But yet,I was happy, stepping on the scale,watching the weight going down.I thought to myself,"Hey man, this is working!WOW!That's a GREAT thing, what an amazing solution!"... Good solution?Great thing?Ah ha! Yeah,right!

After a while, I noticed the pills weren't working so I went up to and gradually got up to more and more, as time went by. In the meantime, I went from brand #1 to brand #2 and grabbing a box of brand #3, supposedly more powerful, whenever I had a chance. It all began with those "natural" kinds, from health stores. "It's N-A-T-U-R-A-L," I thought, "...Can't be bad!" ... Shit, I'm telling you,it's:

B U L L S H I T



Whenever I hear someone going, "Hey look! I bought those at the Health/Natural Food Store.¸In the homeopathic products aisle! All Natural! Look it's even got a leaf on the package!" I go "Forget about the damn leaf!! Have you looked what those "oh-so-natural" contents of those are made of in the first place?"

That's what makes me so upset: young girls -AND young boys- are bombarded with advertising on laxatives, and hearing people saying how "GREAT" this thing is and how it "totally changed my life!" ...It's like, "WOW! Glad it changed YOUR life...Kinda ruined and totally DESTROYED mine! Wanna switch places?? Not so sure you will enjoy being in my shoes!" "The bottom line is that laxatives, whatever brand you buy, natural or normal, all of that is just :

B U L L S H I T !

Anyways, when the natural ones were no longer working, I moved on to brand #4. Then to a bunch of others and found myself in a not-so-good place...See, having taking laxatives for a while by then, I realized NONE of them were working. I had to double the intitial amount so *something* would happen.

I was at my mom's at the time,and, like any other teenager, I was going to school..It was Sunday night: I'd taken laxatives the night before and really thought I'd be alright, and so on.When morning came, I had those MAJOR cramps, and nevertheless, hopped on the bus. I wasn't 3 blocks away,I, even though I was sitting down, HAD to find a bathroom, and just "go"! So, I got off the bus, ran to Mikes',rushed to the bathroom. Thanks Heaven, I'd made it in time.. Thought it was over, so I got out of the bathroom, washed my hands,etc. But, as I opened the door,I felt this sudden URGE: I HAD to go back in the bathroom and sit there, because it was "coming out" again!That's not really what happened...

After a while, I really thought it was okay and for the next 15 minutes, I didn't have any other "urges" to run to the bathroom. So, I thought, "Hey this is okay.It'll be alright!" So, I went back to the bus terminal, waiting for a bus to go to school...The second I got there, I realized I couldn't go to school like this! Man, the "urges" were back, so I took a bus to go back home.. 5 minutes later, I'm at the corner of my street, trying to walk as fast as I possibly could to get home and spend the «day» on the toilet seat.

I began to walk my way back home, which was about 8 minutes walk.You think,"No big deal",right? Let me tell you, if you were in the state I was in, 8 minutes seemed like 8 hours!!! So, midway in my walking, I literally had to STOP WALKING and there I was unable to do another move, because of the cramps but also because I REALLY REALLY thought I’d poop «right there» no jokes about this!!

It was U N B E A R A B L E


So, not without hurting, I managed to get home…~in time!~ But what an awful morning that was!It’s been 3-4 years since it happened and I remember it all too clearly!! Time has passed, years went by and yet to this DAY: it hurts like sonofabitch.

Also,I’ve experienced another product,far more damaging which should be on the market!This substance is an actual P O I S O N . What follows is from a medical encyclopedia:
...is a strong and effective cathartic or purgative (laxative),with components in the oil that affect both the small and large intestines.It has been used to clear the bowels after food poisoning and to relieve constipation.It is sometimes used in hospitals to prepare the patient's abdomen for x rays of the colon or kidneys. Castor oil is classified as a stimulant laxative, also known as a contact laxative. This type of laxative encourages bowel movements by acting on the intestinal wall, increasing the muscle contractions that move along the stool mass. Stimulants are a popular type of laxative for self-treatment, but unfortunately are more likely to cause side effects. There are milder types of laxatives that may be more useful for inducing regularity and treating constipation. Generally laxatives should be used to provide short-term relief only, unless otherwise directed by a doctor.

As I’m sitting here, right now, just writing this down, makes me want to puke...

Do you REALLY want to be spending most of your time HERE?????

To give you an idea of how HORRIBLE this thing is,just read this: you have to take 2 tablespoons and within the next 2 hours the effects are showing up. In comparison with regular laxatives, where it’d be like taking 60 laxatives in one setting, in the case of one who’s never used laxatives before.Can you imagine the tremendous pain??TERRIBLE!It only makes you feel worse, both physically and psychologically...

So, as the years went on, I continued this little pattern of using laxatives almost on a regular basis. However, I noticed,after a while, that, there was a time, where I’d taken them, and drink after and not retain water.It’s not quite like that anymore.


Now :did what I write so far made you realize how BAD laxatives are?
Or are you thinking "Nah, it won’t happen to me!"
No matter what, KEEP READING because the WORST is yet to come..

NOW WHAT? HOW AM I HANGING IN THERE,WITH THE LAXATIVES AND STUFF?WHAT’S HAPPENED?


Here is what can happen to you (YES YOU!)due to the abuse of laxatives:

*BOWEL MOVEMENTS:*
I CAN NOT have normal bowel movements, whatsoever:
I'd gotten up to 60 laxatives (per month) in the past 7-8 months.
And, you’ll agree with me, I’m doing a lot of things, HEALTHY things to try to bring my intestines to function somewhat normally.. Here’s what I'm doing and what's been done to help me:

-I've eaten a lot of veggies and stuff;
-I'm drinking plenty of water;
-I'm exercising,MODERATELY

My ED Team at the hospital,is still with me.Here is what we've agreed on:
-Increasing my fiber intake,in HEALTHYways, such as "All Bran",etc;
-I'm taking 1 « colace »/day. Colace is a light,very light pill, usually given in hospitals when you’re constipated, meant to HELP your bowel’s functionning;
-I was in the hospital, in and out for several reasons and they were giving me 2 colaces, then switched to other things;


GUESS WHAT? HAS WORKED.


****Chronic laxative abuse may result in bleeding and permanent damage to the colon.Prolonged use of laxatives, especially stimulant laxatives such as cascara, senna (sennosides) and bisacodyl, intensifies and perpetuates the condition for which they are used.The bowel becomes atonic and dependency is established. Overuse may cause electrolyte disturbances with symptoms of vomiting and muscle weakness.****

And to this day, my medical doctor,nurse,nutritionnist and myself wonder

"Will this ever come back to normal?Will it ever work by itself again??"


And well, no one has the answer yet.What we know is:
my colon may not be able to function on its own

...I might need a colonic resection or colostomy bag...


I'm begging you: if you're still considering continuing abusing laxatives,well, I'm really sorry... I've attempted through my writing, to prevent this... Anyways,all I can say is THINK AGAIN...



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