| Double Standard |
| Transcript By: Biker Chick/Jo Fan |
| Double Standard Transcript (Jo, Natalie and Tootie and in the lounge playing scrabble and Mrs. Garrett is watching over them trying to help Blair is out with an old friend of hers Harrison) Jo: (Sighs) I can't do anything with these crummy letters! Mrs. Garrett: I think I see something. Jo: Mrs. Garrett please don't kibosh, if you wanna play just sit down. Mrs. Garrett: No, competition gives me a rash. (Blair and Harrison walks in) Blair: (Talking funny) Oh, Hello everyone, don't get up. Mrs. Garrett I want you to meet my dear dear friend Harrison Andrews. He just transferred to Bates Academy. Harrison, Mrs. Garrett our friend, comfadon and slave driver. Mrs. Garrett: How do you do Harrison? Harrison: Hello Mrs. Garrett Natalie: Come on Jo! Tootie: Will you just make a word? Jo: All right, all right. Blair: And these youngsters are my roommates. Reading From right to left Natalie. Natalie: Hi. Blair: Tootie. Tootie: Hi. Blair: And Jo. Jo: Hey (Doesn't even look up) You want a word there's a word. (Natalie and Tootie stare at the word in awe) Mrs. Garrett: Jo, you can't use that it's a four-tile word! (Jo smiles) Blair: That's our Jo, (Giggles with Harrison) Oh. Mrs. Garrett: Have you two known each other long? Harrison: Well actually. (Gets cut off by Blair) Blair: Ever since we were babies. Our families have always hoped we'd grow up and joined our two great bloodlines. Jo: Are you people or racehorse? Blair: Better a racehorse then a jackass. (Jo gives Blair the you better shut up if you know what's good for you look and Blair ignores it) OF course we haven't seen each other in years. Harrison has been going to school in Switzerland Jo: What'd ya major in yodeling? Harrison: A little more then that. Mrs. Garrett: Well after Switzerland I hope you don't find Bates Academy boring. Blair: It'll be so fun we'll puck up where we left off when we were six. Natalie: That'll be cute seeing you two peddling around on tricycles. Blair: Harrion's toys have four wheels now. Tel them about your new Porsche. Harrison: Oh I just got it. Blair: (Cuts him off) It's candy apple red, with his initials on the door. Jo: Turbo charged? Blair: Of course not, he paid cash. (Everyone laughs) Harrison: Yea, it's a 911SC. Jo: With 5 on the floor overhead cam? Harrison: That's right. Jo: I can beat it. Harrison: What? Jo: I got five bucks that my bike can beat your Porsche. (Stands up) Harrison: (stands up) You drive a motorcycle? Jo: Yea and it can beat anything on four wheels. (Natalie and Tootie start cheering Jo on) Mrs., Garrett: Forget it. There will be no burning rubber at Eastland. Let’s see its about time for dinner. Blair go up and change, Gils let's get started. Please excuse us. Blair: Harrison, I'll be back in a second. Harrison: Ok. Blair: Don't you move. (Leaves) Harrison: I wont. Bye bye Tootie: We'll finish the game after dinner. Natalie: Ok, (Natalie and Tootie heads toward the dinning room) Jo: Well you can count me out. I got plans for tonight. (Puts the box to the game on the table and Follows them) Harrison: (Follows Jo) Yea, what kind of plans? Jo: Have a little fun get a few kicks. Harrison: What's life without kicks? Jo: Death. Harrison: Do you just hop on you bike and hit the street? Jo: Only when I don't hold on tight enough. Harrison: I bet you stay out till all hours don't you? Jo: No we have a curfew, and sometimes I even make it. Harrison: So where are you going tonight? Jo: Oh probably swing by the arcade in town. Harrison: How'd you like it if I showed up at the arcade tonight? Jo: It's a public place, I mean I couldn't have you arrested. Harrison: Uh, I got to get back will you tell Blair I had to go. Jo: Sure. Harrison: Nice meeting you girls. Tootie/Natalie: You to. Harrison: Mrs. Garrett (Kisses her hand) It’s been a pleasure. Mrs. Garrett: You must do that again, I mean you must come by again. Harrison: Oh I will (Looks at Jo) Bye. (Leaves) Jo/Tootie/Natalie: Bye. (Commercial) Blair: I'm back Harrison, sorry to have taken so long. Harrison? Tootie: You can unglue your smile now. Blair: Whatever do you mean? Jo: Uh, your boyfriend had to take off. Blair: Oh crud (Talks normal) he didn't even tell me what time we were going to the High Crest Country Club tomorrow night. Natalie: Oh, your going to a dance? Blair: It's not a dance, it's a cotillion. Natalie: What's the difference? Mrs. Garrett: When you hang cray paper and play records in a gym it's a dance. When you hang cray paper and play records in a country club cotillion. Natalie: So when did Harrison ask you? Blair: He hasn't exactly asked me, in so many words. Tootie: If he didn't exactly asked you then maybe your not exactly invited. Blair: That's absurd. Natalie: In my book if you didn't get an engraved invitation in front of witnesses it's iffy a fact. Blair: (Stands up) there are two things in my life that I am sure of. 1. That I will marry money. 2. That I am going to the High Crest Cotillion tomorrow night. (Leaves the room) Natalie: The only thing I'm sure of is that I'll be wearing a retainer till I'm 40, (At 9:00pm in the lounge Natalie, Tootie, Blair and Mrs. Garrett are playing Scrabble) Tootie: Come on Mrs. Garrett there's a time limit you know. Mrs. Garrett: Please I'm working on a killer here. Tootie: This afternoon you said you weren't competitive. Mrs. Garrett: It's funny how you never stop learning about yourself. Blair: Was that the phone? (Stands up) Tootie: Yea, in dorm B. Blair: I think this ones out of order. Natalie: Relax Blair you’re so uptight. Blair: I am not uptight! Natalie: Then how come you keep spelling words like call, phone, dance and kill? Blair: Because I am going to kill Harrison if he does not call me on the phone and tell me about the dance! Natalie: Just as long as you’re not uptight. Blair: This is a stupid game I don't wanna play. Tootie: Come on Blair your just in a rotten mood because you've been stood up. Blair: I have not been stood up! Natalie: Yea, how could she have been stood up if she wasn't even invited? Jo: (Comes in) Hey guys. Tootie/Natalie: Hi Jo. Mrs. Garrett: Hi Jo did you have fun tonight? Jo: Yea arcade is always a trip. Natalie: Anybody there? Jo: Just a few friends. Blair: You and your crummy friends. Jo: Well actually your crummy friends, well one of them anyway Harrison was there. Stubborn son of a gun isn't he? Blair: What? Jo: I couldn't loose him all night, he kept following me around from ski ball to sea wolf to air hockey. Tootie: So that's why Blair bombed out Jo: He stuck to me like flies on a no pest strip. The only way I could get rid of him was to say I'd go out with him. Blair: Harrison asked you out on a dd.... dd. Tootie: Date Blair we call it a date. Jo: Yea there's some wingding tomorrow night. Natalie: Could that be your wingding Blair? Blair: I don't go to wingdings I go to cotillions. Jo: Well if that's a dace at the High Crest Country Club your cotillions and my windings are the same thing. Mrs. Garrett: Now let’s just talk this out Um nobody look at my letters. This is all just a misunderstanding. Blair hoped (Blair sighed) Blair expected, (Blair sighed again) Blair thought? (Blair nods her head) Blair thought that she was going to be invited to the dance by Harrison. And she's been waiting all night for his invitation (Blair sighs) conformation of his invitation. Jo: Wait a sec. you mean poor little Blairise has been waiting by the phone all night waiting for Harrison to ask her to this dance. Tootie/Natalie: Yes! Blair: No! Jo: Hey Blair I might not respect you but I respect your turf you want him you got him I wont take you guy. Blair: Take my guy! Listen when it comes to men the only thing you could take from me is lessons! (Puts her arm on Jo’s shoulder) Jo: (Flings her arm off) Just don't start with me I said I wasn't going I'm trying to be nice. Mrs. Garrett: (Sticks her face in) She is Blair she really is. Blair: OF course your not going you know when you’re out of your league. You wouldn't subject yourself to that kind of humiliation. Jo: What humiliation? Blair: When you drink out of the fingerbowl and put ketchup on you keash. You got no business at that cotillion and you know it. Jo: I got as much business there as you do. In fact I got more I was asked! Oh you know what I am going with your friend! So eat your heat out! Oh and don't forget to put ketchup on it. (Runs out) (Commercial) Mrs. Garrett: You ok Blair, I know your upset that Jo’s going out with Harrison tonight? Blair: Why, that up until 9:00 tonight I thought I was going to the dance with him. Nah If Harrison thinks a girl like Jo can take my place at a dance like that lots of luck! Mrs. Garrett: That sounds very snobbish. Blair: I know but the people at the club are snobbish its what they do best. (Natalie and Tootie walk in) Tootie: Hold on to you heads because this is going to blow your mind! (Opens the door and Jo comes in wearing a “pheasant dress” as Blair calls it) Mrs. Garrett: Jo you look lovely in your beautiful gown. Blair: Ah yes a pheasant dress, now there’s an outfit that makes a statement. Jo: Is she trying to start with me or what? (Tries to hit her) Tootie: Don’t hit her! She’ll bleed on your dress. Jo: (Brings back her fist) Mrs. Garrett: You look sensational. Blair: Excuse me while I go to the kitchen and Julianne something. (Leaves) Jo: I don’t think I can pull this off. Mrs. Garrett: Oh don’t worry you’ll be fine. Jo: (Sits down on a trunk and sees her lime green tennis shoes) Ut oh, I know I was too confortable. What am I going to do I don’t have any fancy shoes. Mrs. Garrett: I happen to have a pair of shoes that I think will be just perfect. (Jo stands up) Natalie: Gee this really is like Cinderella. Jo: Does that mean I can stay out till midnight? Mr. Garrett: You do and I’ll turn Harrison’s Porsche into a skateboard. (Everyone leaves) (About 8:00 Natalie and Tootie are talking) Natalie: What do you think Jo and Harrison are doing now? Tootie: He’s probably saying” May I have this waltz? Natalie: Charmed I’m sure. Tootie: And then they get down and boogie. (Both Natalie and Tootie start cracking up) Blair I’m surprised to see how well you’re taking this whole thing. Blair: Why? Tootie: Because I thought you’d be on the bed kicking and screaming. Blair: No but why? (Gets on her bed and starts kicking and screaming) Natalie: You had to open your mouth didn’t you? Tootie: How do we get her to shut up? Natalie: Do what they do in the movies. Slap her across the face. Blair: (Sits up and shuts up) no that won’t be necessary I’m fine now. (Camera goes in the hall where you see Jo walking her hair is messed up and it looks like she’s been crying she goes in front of Mrs. Garrett’s door and knocks) Mrs. Garrett: Come in. (Jo comes in) Jo are you all right? Were you in am accident? Jo: It was no accident Mr. Harrison Andrews had it all planned. Mrs. Garrett: Well didn’t he take you to the club? Jo: Well actually he took me through the club and out the back door to the ninth green. Mrs. Garrett: Wasn’t it a little dark to play golf? Jo: Yea, but golf wasn’t what he had in mind. Mrs. Garrett: What… Oh no. Jo: Before I knew what happened he pushed me down in this big sandtrap and said “Relax, get comfortable, pretend its Joan’s Beach.” Mrs. Garrett: Harrison, that rotten creep! Jo: I’m usually such a good judge of character. What he tried I never expected. A guy with his background. He’s supposed to be a gentleman. Mrs. Garrett: Why because he can yodel in three different languages? Jo: Can I hang out with you till the girls go to sleep. I don’t want to explain what happened. What a joke you know Mrs. Garrett I had a crazy idea about how a cotillion would be. All the guys would ask me to dance and everyone would be whispering who’s that classy girl where’d she come from? And I’d be treated like I belong there. I wanted to make you proud of me. Mrs. Garrett: Oh I am proud of you. Harrison put you in a terrible position tonight. (Jo looks at her) I mean what he did is inexcusable. And you handled it with such dignity, grace class. Of course part of me wishes you would’ve hauled off and hit him with something. Jo: Oh I did. See that’s what happened to your other shoe. (Mrs. Garrett smiles and hugs her) (Commercial) (Girls bedroom) Blair: The point is, Jo’s not smarter then me, she’s certainly not prettier then I am. Tootie: Try nicer Blair. Blair: No it’s not that. What does she have that I don’t have? Natalie: A motorcycle. Blair: Pardon? Natalie: The thing about a person with a motorcycle is you never know what they’re going to do next. Jo’s adventurous. Blair: Crazy. Natalie: Girls like that are unpredictable I read about it in Teen Magazine. And that’s what attracts Harrison. Blair: Why? Natalie: Because Harrison is in a state of flux. Tootie: What’s flux? Natalie: It’s the stage between a teenager and law school. Tootie: Oh you mean rebellion. Blair: Why didn’t he just say so I would’ve rebelled with him. Natalie: Blair to you rebellion is using your salad fork all through dinner. Jo takes rebellion to an art form. Blair: But look at all this What’s so attractive about this and this (Picks up some of the things lying on Jo’s bed) What does a guy see in a girl that buys her clothes and spark plugs in the same place? Tootie: Well she’s gotta be doing something right because she’s at the dance and you’re… not. Blair: Well look at this (Puts on Jo’s blue jean jacket) Look this looks absolutely… wonderful. (Laughs) I can even make this look wonderful! I could start a whole new trend punk sheik. (Admires herself in the mirror) Natalie: Forget it Blair. You not very convincing as a hell’s angel. Come on Tootie lets go get something to eat. (Downstairs in the cafeteria) Natalie: Let’s check out the candy machine. Harrison: Uh hi. Tootie: Harrison what are you doing here? Harrison: I came to return Jo’s shoe. Natalie: What’d ya do with the rest of her? Harrison: She came home early. Natalie: We’ll go find her for you. Harrison: .Oh look that’s not really necessary will you just give her this? (Blair comes in with Jo’s jacket, gloves, and hat) Blair: Okay if you guys still say I’m not convincing enough… Harrison. Harrison: Blair? (Natalie and Tootie leaves) Blair you look… Blair: Adventurous? Unpredictable, flawless? Harrison: Ridiculous is the word that comes to mind. It’s just not you Blair. You’re Happers Bizzare not Popular Mchanices. Blair: I know you knowI’m perfect, but sometimes people need a break from perfection. Especially when there in flux. Harrison: Flux? Blair” Look I understand that a person who has steak every night can get a sudden craving for a Sloppy Jo. Harrison: A Sloppy Jo? Oh I get it. Your upset because I took out your roommate. Blair: Upset, naw. Surprised, humiliated, how could you take her to the club! Harrrison: Blair I didn’t actually take her to the club (Jo appears in the doorway but neither of them see her) I took her behind the club. But listen you know how it is. If I was going there to dance I’d have you on my arm. But what I was after tonight was a little putting action on the ninth green. Blair: And you expected Jo to let you play through. Harrison: Sure that kind of girl usually does. (Camera shows Jo leaning against the counter with her arms folded) And after all I’m only human. Blair: So what you saying is theres two kinds of wonen. The kind you marry and the kind you don’t. Jo: That’s exactly what he’s saying. Blair: (Runs over by Jo) How can you let him say that! Do somethin’ deck him! Jo: I already did that. Harrison: Well I guess I better leave. Blair: No buster you stick around here. I’ll deck you! (Runs after him and Jo grabs her arms and tries to hold her back and calm her down) Harrison: (Lays Jo’s shoe down) Uh say hi to your mam for me. Blair: Yea I’ll tell how how much of a sleeze you are! (Tries to break free of Jo’s grasp) Jo: Hey hey cool it! (Let’s her go once Harrison is gone) Blair: I haven’t been this upset since the price of gold went down. Jo: How come you got so crazy? Blair: He insulted you! Jo: Yea but you do that all the time. Blair: Yea, but that’s different. When I do it I know what I’m talking about. Why do guys act that way. One minute there jumping to conclusions then there jumping on you. Jo: Well I guess when you come from the wrong side of the tracks guys think your easy. Blair: Listen they think that when you come from the right side. Heck I own the tracks and some of them think it about me. Jo: Boy you and me with the same problem now no one will believe that. Blair: Well we just won’t tell anyone huh? (They start to head upstairs and smle at each other and the screen freezes) |