** (out of ****)
Starring Aishwarya Rai, Martin Henderson, Nadira Babbar, Anupam Kher, and Daniel Gillies
Directed by Gurinda Chadha & written by Chadha and Paul Mayeda Berges, from the novel by Jane Austen
2004
112 min PG13
Disappointing. Recasting Jane Austen’s “Pride and Prejudice” as a Bollywood musical sounds like a great idea. The affluent and arrogant British landowner Darcy becomes an insensitive American hotel magnate. The outspoken country girl from a once great family is now an outspoken Indian girl from a once great family. Indeed, “Bride and Prejudice” has some neat scenes and dialogue that uses, as the boy’s “pride,” blank-faced American superiority, and as her “prejudice,” the Third World’s instinctive wariness of America.
But, for all it’s literary pedigree, “Pride and Prejudice” is powered by an Idiot Plot. The “Idiot Plot” is a term coined (or maybe just popularized) by Roger Ebert. He uses it to describe a movie in which the major conflict could be cleared up early on if the two main characters just talked a little bit longer. To wit: the girlfriend thinks the boyfriend is kissing another girl. She stalks away before he can explain the other girl is his sister. The girlfriend doesn’t find this out until 75 minutes later. “Pride and Prejudice” is equally frustrating, and I should know, because I just read it a month ago. The Boy and The Girl refuse to talk out their problems for just a couple of minutes. In an 18th century way, he says “I can explain!” and she says “Don’t bother!” when an explanation would set everything straight.
The arbiters of the canon teach us to forgive Austen’s use of the Idiot Plot. Maybe she was its inventor, or the first to apply it to a romance, or maybe the point is that the social conventions of the time forced the Idiot Plot on the characters. Anyone who took Honors English all four years in high school doesn’t ever need to hear the phrase “social conventions of the time” ever again. Certainly the fact that almost every single crummy romantic comedy ever since uses an Idiot Plot attests to the popularity of Austen.
So, aside from those bits of culture clash, “Bride and Prejudice” is not a million miles away from an Indian “From Justin to Kelly.” Okay, that’s a bit unfair: the production design is better, the direction is better, and the use of color is beautiful. And the acting (by the Indians) is better than “From Justin to Kelly.” The lead and her various sisters (Aishwarya Rai, Meghna Kothari, and Peeya Rai Chowdhary) are the curvy Bollywood bombshells that put fake-breasted American stick-women to shame (see “Monsoon Wedding” for a virtual compendium of how much more interesting real-life women are than too super-perfect, Victoria’s Secret fantasies). As for the non-Indian actors, the white guys aren’t up to the challenge of the high energy Indians. The jerk-who-turns-out-to-be-the-hero (Martin Henderson of “The Ring”) and the stud-who-turns-out-to-be-a-jerk (Daniel Gillies) both come across as good-looking and blank. You’ll forget these two dream guys long before you forget the comic relief Kholi (Nitin Chandra Ganatra), whose new-found and ill-fitted Americanism is both provocative and enormously amusing. By no fault of his own, he’s both the best and worst kind of supporting character: more interesting than the leads.
“Bride and Prejudice’s” music isn’t memorable. The musical numbers feel tedious because the songs are simply reiterating plot points and dialogue we’ve already absorbed. A first-class musical, like “Chicago” or “Everybody Says I Love You” (or is it “Everyone Says I Love You?”) will not use a song to repeat what’s already been said, but will have its characters burst into song because they’re singing something they can’t bring themselves to say. Just writing this makes me think of the goofy-faced, wide-eyed wonder of Edward Norton in “Everybody” when he finally broke out in song; he couldn’t stand the silence of having his feelings bottled up anymore.
A straight-ahead, prestige adaptation of “Pride and Prejudice,” starring Keira Knightley and Dame Judi Dench, is forthcoming. But the most exciting recent “Pride” is probably “Bridget Jones’ Diary.” Yes, Fielding’s book IS based on “P&P,” down to the love triangle and the name Darcy, and Fielding is the first to admit it. The movie efficiently throws out its unnecessary characters, like the sisters, Darcy’s friends, etc., leaving the triangle and the girl’s doting dad and superficial mum. But “Bridget Jones” also removes the Idiocy and makes the romance more like a real-life relationship. In place of a giant secret that takes forever to reveal because of everything a screenwriter can contrive, we simply don’t know the other person very well.
Finished Sunday, October 23rd, 2005
Copyright © 2005 Friday & Saturday Night
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