Arnie is a Jewish psychiatrist, a former university faculty colleague  and a dear friend. Periodically we have lunch at a diner near the college where we both taught. We laugh,tell jokes,argue,debate,gossip and have a lot of  appropriate fun.
 
One time when we were debating  Abortion, I had used the tern  " Pro abortion ."  Arnie strongly disagreed with the term and insisted that more correctly I should have said  " Pro choice ."  Both   of us have an admirable quality  whereby we can fundamentally disagree  and still be friends--and enjoy each other !  In effect,we can disagree  without being disagreeable.
 
I asked  (  being a licensed shrink myself   and sensitive to the  CONNOTATIONS  of words)  what  " choice " meant ?   Arnie then used  party line language, saying that abortion was the least desireable  of all options  but that he supported  the right of a woman   to CHOOSE  what to do with her own body. Even though that option meant  ( unfortunately )
the taking of an innocent life, the woman still had that right so to behave. Arnie supported  that behavior.
 
Being a bit of a rascal  with my own Jewish-Irish background, I translated what he said as I saw it  in the following way:
 
PRO  means  " I support " or I am in favor of.
Choice  means that a woman has the right to kill life within her IF she so chooses
"Least desireable"  means that we accept the fact that IT IS killing a fellow human creature.
Hence, when a person says  " I am pro-choice" this person is saying the following:
 
   I support and  am in favor of a  woman  killing life within her--- if she so chooses.
I know it is killing life  but I support  it anyway.
 
For me putting the proposition into such  bald terms  makes the discussion  clearer. It appears to me that is a question of linguistic framing. To say  " Pro life "  connotes a far more positive and  meaningful thrust  than to say  " anti-abortion."   To say   " pro abortion"  says something more powerful than to say  " pro choice." Arnie saw clearly  that my saying  Pro abortion is far more  oppositional  to his position than for me to say  Pro choice.
 
Within this framework, the understandable but devious plea of inconvenience, of  limited time, of money, of lost vacations, of school expenses  surfaces when that unwanted pregnancy occurs!But  there also  surfaces a more honest appraisal of abortion. Unmasking happens!
Now we see selfishness and narcississm when the ugly and grisly "profession"  of abortionist
takes center stage.  The violence against an innocent minority ( fetuses)  should  be seen for what it is.   It is a violence which opens up a world of coarseness,vulgarity, incivility and  insensitivity  which has splattered us since l973.
 
Why speak up?  I am a half Jew and I have learned from the Hochuth debacle of his
"Deputy"  that silence is wrong and inappropriate. I know that silence might be conceived as consent  or compliance with a monstrous  evil.  I have learned that silence in  the face of oppression  helps only the oppressor. I have learned from the  holy Mother Teresa of Calcutta that the unleashing of violence  by mothers against  their own children  in abortion  has calloused the modern psyche  to an unbelieveable and  sadistic level.
 
Arnie and I debate. But cordially. Out of  the exchanges have come further clarities forme about the eternaltension between  good and evil. I see that this  abortion evil  has been sold to the public  by clever  ( even satanic ) linguistic  skill.  To DENOTE  what words mean brings clarification about reality. To retreat  to the mists of ambiguity  of connotation can mean living
in a kind of massive,collective trance. People desperately want to believe in  the " nobility" of choice but at the same time they sense  that all is not right  in this  kind of Denmark.
 
Jesus said something terribly frightening  about those who mislead His little ones. A millstone around  the neck and being cast into the sea is not my idea  of beautiful living.  Those      who
know better hadddbestnot mislead  little ones by keeping silent in the face of evil.  Better to be unpopular and to be considered medieval  than to drown in the eternities.
 
Arnie and I will continue to  debate and  laugh and enjoy pasta.   And we  will continue to disagree-----but,please God, we will never be disagreeable.

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