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 On the road again!! We left Canada with a bang with 40 cm of fresh snow. We felt silly hauling our bikes through the snow onto Ed and Cheri's truck to get to the airport.

"Mind the Gap" (the drone over some London tube P.A. systems): London hasn't changed much since we lived there (some say it hasn't changed much in 200 years). We did notice an increase in traffic (and in the
rest of Britain) despite the 68 pence ($1.60 Canadian) per liter of petrol. The roads also seemed to be a little narrower than we remember them.

 We stayed at our flat on Warwick Square (thank you Rodd and Nancy!). It felt like we had gone through a worm-hole and went back in time a couple of years. We had an auspicious start; we spotted the Queen's corgi dogs in the back garden of Buck palace. We also noted that Tony
Blair's "Cool Britain" campaign (to raise the profile of British design, etc) is really working. The U.K. is now firmly in the 20th century; we spotted more plane spotters than train spotters.

   One of the advantages of Red Deer, Alberta is that we can safely wander the shopping malls and never bump into anyone we know, but London was another matter. In London, we caught up with friends and family: we seemed to be always preparing for leaner days that never seem to come! We  also spent more time on trains on  trains than on our bicycles.  On our train north to bonnie Scotland, they didn't have much to apologize for, so the senior conductor apologized for a delay in the trolley service (I don't think anyone had noticed). We got our fill of apologies in just a couple of weeks.

   Glenn managed a 3 day trip to the Lake district with the LMC (mountaineering club). By the first morning we managed to experience rain, wind gusts, accidentally split the group up and we got lost, all before lunch time! Good to see the club hasn't  changed. Having done all that, we managed to enjoy the balance of the week-end after those "unpleasant" moments.

   Up in Scotland, we stayed in Oban with Cousin Helen and Bill. We brought the sunshine with us and even managed to put in a few miles on
our bikes, in spite of the sheep and lambs running in front of our wheels.    We aborted a stop in Stratford-on-Avon (to see Simon) as the monsoons reached Staffordshire early this year. It seems that El Nino finally caught up with us and has now followed us throughout the early stages of our bike trip.

   When we set out from the Forbes' place, south of London, our fully loaded bikes felt more like trucks than sports models we had up in Scotland. Between bursts of rain and train journeys of convenience, we made our way down to Portsmouth and on an overnight ferry journey to St. Malo, France. We were greeted with (surprise, surprise) slushy snow on arrival and we managed to make the adjustment from miles to kilometers and riding back on the right side of the road (despite a couple of relapses!) and we crawled into Dinan, a wonderful medieval town. We hope that Glen Peers' "law of averages" doesn't apply over here (i.e. that a warm dry winter means a wet cold summer).

  We rode down to the Loire and toured the chateau laden Loire valley for a week; plenty of attractive medieval
towns. However we more enjoyed the cross-country riding through farmlands, getting to and out of the Loire.

Currently, we are staying a couple of days with the Holmgrens in their farmhouse in Puychevrier. We are recharging our batteries, preparing for our next leg onto Geneva. We have been "soaking" in the French ambiance. After Britain's high prices, France appears very reasonable. Although France may score low on the "banana index" (3 bananas for 1 USD here), you can find a perfectly fine bottle of Cote du Rhone for the equivalent of 4 bananas or a Bordeaux for 5 bananas. Hold the bananas and bring on the wine!

We do plenty of handshaking over here but still can't explain the mystery of the missing toilet seats as yet, but we are working on it….

Distance to date: 850 kilometers.
Number of days with rain: 14
Number of days without rain: 1
Number of times we have stayed in one place for 3 nights because of poor
weather: 2
Number of days without wine: 1
Cost per day in France: 150 Francs (25 USD) for 2 people

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Gasp…..We made it through to Geneva, Switzerland and for the moment it is like summer; hot and sunny…we are staying with the Ostermans for a few days…

    From the Holmgren's farmhouse we headed east, eventually through Burgundy (western Burgundy is very attractive) and the Jura down into Switzerland.

The cows in France seem to be very curious about cyclists, so we have begun designing a bike for cows. We still have not figured out how to get the cow onto the bike. Any Ideas ?

    The French sure know how to live, but we are not sure if anyone is working there: they have 4 statutory holidays in May. Supermarkets (and all stores) are closed for 2 hours over lunch. They are also closed on Sundays and Monday mornings. It is tricky business buying food, when you are on a bike buying on a daily basis, but once you know the rules, it's okay.

   On the topic of supermarkets… if you know the cashier, in some places, it is common practice to kiss her 4 times on the cheeks. We think this would be a great idea for supermarkets in other countries. Safeway and Tesco, forget about Airmiles and Tesco points, bring in a frequent kissing program instead.
 

• Thumbs up to: French friendliness, secondary road system, campsites, the bread, wine cheese, pate, supermarkets.
• Thumbs down to: the April weather, birds that chirp all night long.
• Most bizarre site: we spotted 3 English train spotters on holiday watching the trains go by.
• The gift for the person who has everything: a waterproof baguette holder.

Kilometers to date : 1400.

Number of Flats to date: one.

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We are enjoying French hospitality, staying with Emmanuel and Delphine (who we met in Ecuador). Valèrie and Bernard are also visiting and we are off to do the vineyards today...

 We last left off in Geneva; chez les Ostermans, where Glenn did the male bonding thing with buddies Peter and Jean-Paul (who was in town from Montreal).

We rode from there along the lake (incredibly clean water; people actually swim in it and we ate some of it's famous trout) through Lasaunne. We climbed through Swiss vineyards (surprising how many there are), then we made a stop in Gruyère and checked out a cheese factory and the very beautiful and touristic village itself. Switzerland is so beautiful; if it was in Canada, we would have made the whole country into a national park. It is not flat.

Then we moved onto Murten a beauty by another lake and then through Biel where they make Rolex and Omega watches. All through Switzerland, we had to hide our Casio and Timex watches. We decided we had enough of Swiss traffic (too many cars and no tertiary road system to speak of) and headed over the French border into the Jura.

Switzerland is the place for bankers, diplomats and rich farmers but not for unemployed bums like us; you don't have to be a millionaire in Switzerland, but it sure helps (a low score on the banana index: 2 for 1USD). Only Britain makes Switzerland look reasonably priced.

We hopped onto a train to get us beyond a few busy highways, then climbed some very steep hills to stay a couple of nights in a village called Bendorf (France). The campsite managers were very helpful, the roads quiet, forests and mixed farmland with plenty of hills and incredible whole wheat bread from a wood burning oven at the local boulangerie ( we were given a tour of the bakery). We didn't want to leave. When we did it was the mandatory kissing on the cheeks with everyone in the village and onto Basel Switzerland on the borders of France, Switzerland and Germany. We stayed and shopped on the French side. Further north it is apparently possible to bike 170 km through 4 countries (France, Germany, Luxembourg and the Netherlands), but in Basel, a 10km ride will take in three countries. People around here must be good at currency conversions. That will all be changing in less than 8 months when the Euro comes to be (except in Switzerland). We have even seen bakeries in small French towns with prices listed in French Francs and Euros.

This is the Alsatian (Germanic) part of France with village names like Pfetterhouse, Friesen, Oberlag and Koestlach. There are increasing numbers of gnomes in gardens. We are now heading north through Alsace then over to Germany (Mossell and Rhine rivers). So far the only turrets we have spied on the German side of the Rhine are smokestacks but the river looks pretty clean.

Marketing idea for Ontario Hydro: Swiss people drink 'light' water (less fizzy). How about heavy water instead?

Seen on the streets of Basel (home of plenty of cyclists): a one legged cyclist who passed us.

The size of buckets: some cow bells in Switzerland.

Swiss political correctness: sheep wear bells too.

Best deals in Switzerland: Swiss army knives and chocolate.

Free language lessons: The overpriced Swiss campsites are very tight. You get to listen to your neighbour even if you don't understand a word they are saying.

Worth a second look: Geoff Brown reports from Woking, England that in his village, waterproof baguette holders double up as penis sheaths.

Number of nights that we have slept in our tent: 32.

Number of nights in a bed: 8.

Best investment we have made: Thermorest sleeping pads.

A revelation: Sheila discovered that she could have bought a moped for the same price as her bicycle.

A quote from Bruce Basaraba: 'good to see that travels are as challenging as they should be. If it was easy, everyone would be doing it'.

Most difficult computer keyboards to type on: French (they moved a bunch of letters around to confuse anglophones)

Our itinerary since Geneva: Forel (North of Lausanne), Gruyère; Murten, Bendorf (France), Basel (Switzerland), Mulhouse (France).

Number of kilometers to date: 2,000.

Number of consecutive days of sunshine upto today: 14.

Favorite Cycling area: French Jura.

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Best cycling: FRANCE

Best behaved dogs: English and German

Biggest beer guts: German

Worst tasting tap water: London

Best wursts: Germany

Most unfriendly tourist offices: Germany

Friendliest cows: France

Friendliest sheep (plutonic sense): Scotland

Biggest snails: France

Best door stoppers: German bread

Best sounding church bells: Luxembourg

Tightest underwear: Germany (very uptight)

Worst drivers: Swiss

Best bread: France

Best cheese: France

Best beer: England

We made a day trip to Freiberg Germany which is twinned with Madison Wisconsin (let's hear the cheers Shanna). We made another day trip to Europa Park in Germany. Europa Park is a Disney type family park where German techno beat meets with snow white. At 9:00 a.m. (no coffee required) we braved meteorite showers and rode an indoor galactic roller coaster then rode the Euromir ride. Europe is hot; USA is not. Does USA have a Mir? I think not. Is it safe? As safe as a Lada in space. We could not get on the Lada Autodrone because we were too tall (just for kids). No need for Mickey Mouse when we have Euro Mouse. And hunds (dogs) are allowed in Europa Park, though they are not permitted on most rides (we thought it was a bit discriminatory as dogs eat in restaurants here).

Then we set off for Strasbourg (a nice city) and through the North Vosges (good riding) into Lorraine, a very poor part of France. We rode down to the Moselle River and the 3 borders area of France, Luxembourg and Germany.

Shengen, Luxembourg is where the Europeans agreed to eliminate many border formalities (we have not shown our passports since leaving the UK). Nowadays, Shengen is a collection of gasoline stations where Germans fill up on less expensive gas and cheap cigarettes. By far the longest queue was at the Shell station. Have the Germans forgotten the Brent Spar already???

We went inland to Luxembourg City. Whilst it is a major Euro banking center, it was hard to find an ATM. Nice town. In the main square, American fast food joints (MCDonalds, Pizza Hut, Chi Chis) competed with Parisian style cafes (nothing like free enterprise). The bike path into the city was unbelievable- along a creek in a forested canyon-we took an elevator upto the old town. This would have been and effective way of keeping enemies out in the old days-simply turn the elevator off!! The people there all seemed to be trilingual and drive Mercedes; it is a nice toy country.

Off to Echternach (very nice) in Luxembourg which is 1300 years old but a mere adolescent compared to 2,000-year-old Trier, Germany alongside the Moselle River. In Trier, we went by the birthplace of Karl Marx (disappointed to find that he was not one of the comic brothers, but he was the guy who hosed a lot of the world into thinking that sharing was possible). He lived in a pretty nice house for a communist.

We followed the Moselle River to the Rhine- nice 200-km bike path. The valley itself has steep hillsides where forests have been destroyed for vineyards so that the world can drink sweet German wine. Makes you, well thirsty, for a beer (cannot beat those 1 litter tins of beer!). There are an amazing number of touring cyclists in Germany (all shapes and sizes, mostly over 50's) proving that build the bike paths and they will come. Some cyclists even have suitcase on the back of their bikes. One guy with a cane strapped to his bike passed us!!

Remember it is not the destination, but the fahrt that is important (fahrt is journey in German). Other notable fahrts include fahrtgasse and zufahrt....

They are not kidding: supermarkets close mid day Saturday and reopen on Monday. Sunday shopping is at the local gasoline station shop.

Cheek: a 2DM surcharge for staying only one night at a campsite in Cochem Germany.

Out of this world: Biere de Mars (in France)

-All Germans speak English

-It only rains on weekends

-French don't use soap

Travel tip for French people going to Germany: don't try to kiss the supermarket cashier

Spotted: an Adolf Hess car dealership in Trier

Kilometers traveled to date: 3800

Number flat tires: 4

Number of tires replaced: 2

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· England drops more than a World Cup football match, it drops 2 places in the beer wars as

- Bavaria is now on top with 5,000 breweries in Germany, some of them get it right.

-Czech Republic is in 2nd spot with some superb beers and with prices as low as 20 pence for 1 litter, who can argue?

· Best tourist offices: Czech Republic

· Cheapest campsite: Czech Republic (1.50 USD 2pp)

· Most expensive campsite: Switzerland (20 USD 2pp)

· Bet countries for cycling:

1. FRANCE

2. SCOTLAND

3. Czech Republic

…We last left off in Regensberg, Bavaria, where we went on a mad shopping spree and Sheila bought a surrogate TV: a short wave radio. We also drank beer with a group of crazy English bricklayers working in Germany- they offered us transport to Frankfurt for a German rave, but we couldn't bear the thought of travelling on an autobahn and cover a daily cycle distance each half an hour. ….We followed the Danube to Passau, Germany (great campsite) in time to celebrate a Burgerfest. Lots of music and beer, but no hamburgers. Burger means people in German. The town had a hangover when we set out for Austria.

….The Danube Gorge between Passau and Linz is awesome and is accessible only to cyclists on paved paths. Austria is a bike friendly country. Just past Linz, we stopped at the Multhausen concentration camp, the last such liberated in WWII. A moving experience: we were shocked by the treatment of the prisoners by the Nazis.

….Heading north towards the Czech border, we reached friendly Freistadt, with a few hills in between. Freistadt is a small, walled historic town. After 30 consecutive nights in our tent, we stayed at the hostel and had the place to ourselves for 2 nights. It was located right off the main square and came complete with kitchen, TV and a revolving disco ball all for 6USD pp.

…A mere 65km ride north of Freistadt, we landed in Cesky Krumlov, yet another medieval town (UNESCO World Heritage Site), this time in Czech Republic. The border officers waved us through when we mentioned that we are friends of Charles Slagorsky. One expects great change when travelling by plane or car but not by bicycle. It felt like entering another world. Skoda cars and old trucks replaced Mercedes. Prices dropped several fold: our fist dinner with beer in a nice Bohemian restaurant (we are after all in Bohemia) cost us 5USD for 2. And the beer is excellent (including Budweiser on tap). We hit 2 totally different paths: the Aussies doing the European pub-crawl and the Czechs paddling the Vltava.

….So the next day we set out on a 2 day canoe trip which turned out to be a giggle. Within 1 an hour, Glenn was chest deep in the river, swamped by a huge standing wave. We stayed at a campsite with 300 Czechs: plenty of makeshift tents, campfires and guitar playing.

….Heading North, we passed through Cesky Budejovice (Budweiser home), Trebon, Tabor and Benesov.

….The riding in Czech Republic is excellent. There is very little traffic other than on the National Highways. From time to time, the road surface deteriorates, so you cannot fall asleep on the wheel, though the road surface is better than in Ireland or Quebec. Many of the roads are lined with cherry or apple trees (we confess; we pinched a few) over rolling, mixed farming and plenty of pine forests.

….Today, we pulled into Prague and it looks good. Tomorrow, we rendezvous with Glenn's cousin, Wayne, and ride with him to Budapest…

· Booze/Drink shops in Germany are called "getrank" shops · The cost of a made to measure suit of armor in Cesky Krumlov:

2,000USD (useful in the corporate jungle?)

· Czech fashion around the campsite: bathing suit or underwear and T shirt with a beer in one hand (as early as 8:30 am) and an ice cream in the other

· Travel tip for Germany and Austria: don't mention the gnomes

· Back to the drawing board: our latest design for a bicycle for cows is recumbent

· Advice required: what to do about snoring Germans in the campsites

· Weather: lots of it. We wore our fleece jackets this morning (July 2nd). It has been a cool summer, but great biking weather.

Kilometers covered so far: 4,600 (would not even get us across Canada!)

Tires replaced: 3 and desperately looking for a 4th

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We headed south back towards Austria through a couple of UNESCO World Heritage Sites including Kutna Hora and its chapel of bones (40,000 people's bones "decorated" the interior). At lovely Telc, we stayed in a bungalow and waited out the continuing cool wet weather (on July 8th you could see your breath during the afternoon). The Czech cycling was like Smirnoff Vodka: it leaves you breathless, with the constant up and downs.

Austria was a big let-down after Czech Republic...we worked our way through northern Austria and coasted down to the Danube, passing through Melk and Krems, then waltzed into Vienna along the excellent Danube bike path, with a terrific tailwind. Vienna itself is a beautiful city, very regal, a city of statues and classy streetcars but a little full of itself, smothered in its own history. On our last afternoon, we found the outdoor food market run mostly by Turkish merchants, then lounged in one of the city's coffee shops.

It was back on the saddle, further along the Danube to face the horrors of getting through Bratislava, the capital of Slovakia. 50km out of Bratislava, the traffic disappeared and the cheap beers returned. The campsites took on Fellini-esque proportions: packed with tents, hot thermal swimming pools and discos that thumped till 4:00 am. Southern Slovakia lacked charm, traffic and foreign tourists but features plenty of parky (hot dogs) and beer. The roads were quite good- with the exception of a track, that earned Glenn the nickname of Vasco de Gama. We pushed our bikes up a muddy path, overgrown with stinging nettles for a couple of kilometers. Our wheels locked up with mud. Finally, real adventure travel, and the clients didn't seem to really appreciate it.

We then returned back to the Danube at Eztergom, Hungary. The thermometer shot upto 37 Celsius. We found our fluency in Czech/Slovak (about 20 words, not to mention our written comprehension of at least 40 words) did us no good with Hungarian. Eztergom has a very impressive cathedral, but the greatest attraction for us was the cool uncrowded swimming pool at the campsite.

We rode along the Danube and over a couple of hills to stay with Rita and Zoltan (great Hungarian painters, of garage floors, that is). We have enjoyed tremendous hospitality and have been impressed with the city- lots of architecture straddling the Danube and its liveliness. Evening eating in pleasant garden restaurants have been real highlights.

This is as far east as will go on this trip..so we head west through Hungary onto Slovenia. Hungary looks like it has plenty of good touring potential..if it were only not so bloody hot...

Scrabble anyone? Number of pages of Czech words beginning with "z" in our pocket dictionary: 8. Equivalent on the English side of the dictionary: 1/8th of a page.

The Ultimate in Humility: An East German manufactured Trabant car sputtering up a Czech hill and passing us.

Wayne's biggest disappointment: our support vehicle turns out to be fictitious.

Highlight of Telc bungalow stay: our neighbours, Czech teenagers, throwing water filled condoms at passing people.

Cost of a man's haircut in Telc: 60 cents U.S.

Sweat it out: It is puzzling that we have not seen one fan in Hungary.

Hungarian hospitality tip: never toast with beer (wine or spirits are OK) as that is what the Austrians did after putting down a Hungarian rebellion.

Kilometers-to-date: 5,700

Number of flats: 7

Number of times we asked for "the check please" in Czech Republic: 2

Cost per day per person cycling in Slovakia: 10 USD, including all the frankfurters you can eat.