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| Pictures of the Week, no month, no half-year... |
| These pictures will take some time to load. That is not my fault. It is the fault of wood nymphs living in between the plywood partitions of your closet door. They're there now. Laughing at you. |
| You've always got to be careful in the jungle - you never know when a tiger will jump out the bushes and get you. |
| Education Secretary Rod Paige calls a press conference to prove the existence of Noodles, the rabbit who's been overseeing the No Child Left Behind program. "Told you Noodles was real," said Paige. |
| Despite my usually elegant tact, I am unable to find a subtle way to tell Dick Cheney he's not invited to my son's first birthday party. |
| It's comforting to know I live in a country where a man as ugly as Egyptian President Hosni Muburak would never be elected. |
| As home delivery costs skyrocket, consumers are forced to find new and unique ways of getting their electronics home from Best Buy. |
| Wisconsin resident Pamela Lipschitz offers her daily memorial to an oil stain that looks like Elvis. "Anyone who thinks this doesn't prove the existence of God is obviously from Rigel-7, or a large insect." |
| Zoologists are baffled as drug addiction among polar bears skyrockets and animals like this one are seen toking off power bongs. |
| As election day draws closer, Democrats begin wearing wax effigies of Bill Clinton on their head to ward off evil spirits. |
| Excuse me, beautiful, but I believe you have something in your eye... |
| Toward the end, actor Peter Ustinov had forgotten how to do pretty much anything. |
| Toronto Maple Leafs forward Gary Machado is ejected for a uniform violation. "Nowhere in the rule book does it say I have to wear skates," said Machado. "That's a personal choice. I'm just trying to express myself." |
| Likwise, Real Madrid forward David Beckham is criticized for his uniform choice. "Why does everyone always think I'm trying to draw attention to myself?" asked Beckham. "By the way, Addidas rocks!" |
| Moby's fascination with space suits continues it's long and odd course. |
| Realtor Ahmed Mohammad shows one of Fajullah's new luxury condominiums. "They're so airy," said Mohammad. "Your heating costs will go WAY down." |
| So you're going to stay the course, are you Mr. President? Stay the course? Could you say it a dozen more times in case the people in the back didn't hear it? Stay the course. Gotcha. |
| Protests in Baghdad show just how confused the Iraqi people really are. "We must kill the Warmonger Nazi Jew!," yelled protestors. "To Hell with the Godless pagan pantheistic pig dog creature!" |
| After bombing miserably at a recent nationally televised press conference, Bush is stunned to find out his harshest critics were Condoleeza Rice and Karl Rove. "YOU SUCK!" yelled Rove. "Get off the stage, asswipe!" |
| The look that says it all. |
| NEW FEATURE FOR THE 2004 PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION!!! |
| I AM STANDING IN FRONT OF AN IRONIC SIGN! |
| Look for a fun and exciting episode of "I Am Standing in Front of an Ironic Sign" every week! Or month! Or however often I find them! |