| AND A GOOD WEEK WAS HAD BY ALL |
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| Please humor us and allow these pictures to load. The text is even LESS funny without them. |
| Wisconsin inventor Phillip Whipple shows his model for a "flying machine" that he believes will revolutionize travel. His fellow countrymen promptly burn him as a heretic. |
| Frustrated by failing stock prices, the CEO of Lucent Technology takes matters into his own hands. |
| Seattle Mariners outfielder Ichiro Suzuki celebrates his election to the All-Star Game by eating 50 hot dogs in 12 minutes. |
| Further proof that the world is ending came this week when it rained trout in rural Idaho. Local farmers are wary, but well fed. |
| This week's winner of the "Completely Hopeless Cause" contest is Mark Smith of Seattle, Washington. |
| The transportation world was rocked this week with the revelation that Amtrak was allowing stuffed bears to drive its trains. Amtrak responded to the allegations by saying "The friggin' train is on a track; how can you possibly screw it up?" |
| Dick Cheney is forced to postpone his scheduled bout with the Dalai Lama indefinitely due to heart trouble. "I'd have heart trouble too if I had to fight me," said Lama. "He's a friggin' pussy." |
| Another weekend at UMass comes and goes. |
| Woke up this morning, got yourself a gun. |
| Obligatory beaver shot. |
| IF ANYONE NEEDS ME, I'LL BE UP KENNEBUNKPORT. |
| President Bush's unparalleled football skills are proven when he is able to pass over the head of three six-year old boys. "This game is easy," said Bush. "I guess black folks just don't make very good athletes." |
| The Philly Phanatic, mascot of the Philadelphia Phillies, shares a laugh with George W. Bush, mascot of the American people. |
| "Don't I have friggin' aides to help me with this crap? I mean, what am I, the President?" |
| Mr. Bush argues vehemently with a young man about who is more dope, P. Diddy or DMX. |