Part 3 of 4
In the 5-star EFT DVDs the concept of polarity reversal is introduced. For those of you not familiar with the term, polarity reversal it is essentially an energetic phenomenon where a person may say one thing, but deep down inside not really mean it. For example, if Sally said she wanted to lose weight but then you muscle tested her to see if that statement was true you would get a weak response, indicating that on some level it is not true. In her head Sally may mentally know she wants to lose weight, but due to the polarity reversal phenomenon she will invariably sabotage all attempts to lose the weight and keep it off.
Polarity reversals also keep EFT procedures from working. If there is a polarity reversal, which I will abbreviate as PR from now on, to getting beyond the problem, EFT will not work until the PR is neutralized. That is the purposes of the setup phrase while either tapping the karate chop point or rubbing the sore spot. By starting all EFT procedures with the sore spot or karate chop point you are certain to get rid of the PR.
I spoke with a mentor of mine who is very proficient in Thought Field Therapy, a tapping therapy from which EFT was born, about the topic of PR. He gave me some very interesting information. He said that he always knows when his wife is suffering from PR because her conversations will always have an undercurrent of irritation and fault finding. He was speaking of when his wife was just “reversed” in general. This could be caused by a number of things.
It could be caused from eating a certain food, interacting with a certain person or even wearing an offensive chemical or piece of clothing. PR in general can be quite annoying when someone intends to carry on a meaningful or even benign conversation. It essentially sabotages the communication process from the very beginning.
One of the great things about doing EFT intentionally is that if you notice PR occurring either in yourself or in someone else you mean to have a pleasant conversation with, you can correct it immediately. I would not advise telling your mate that he or she needs to do some tapping for being reversed while in the middle of the conversation. If they are reversed it will just make communication more difficult, because more than likely tempers will flare. If they aren’t reversed it will just make you look foolish. I’ve learned this from experience.
Luckily I have a very self-aware wife. I’m sure you can imagine how irritating it could be to have some say, “Maybe you should do some tapping. I think you are reversed.” Especially when you really believe your aggression or frustration is valid as you try to communicate your point. At first she got irritated when I would ask if she was reversed, but when she saw that she was after doing a simple tapping procedure, we’ve learned to point it out gently to each other so we can make the most of our conversations without a PR getting in the way.
Learning how to correct this with just intention is a marvelous tool to bringing harmony to all your communicative endeavors.
Before learning the basic technique it is important to have a firm grasp on how PR can show up in conversations within the person you are talking to and within yourself. If you typically get along with the person you are speaking with and you find that everything you say is being taken as though you are attacking them or they are finding fault with just about everything you are saying, they might be reversed. If you find yourself getting easily irritated or frustrated with the person, you may be reversed as well. It takes a bit of detachment to see this clearly.
So if you are not easily able to look at things as objectively as possible I would recommend muscle testing. If the person you are with is open to this, you can practice muscle testing on each other to determine where the reversal lies.
Here is how we used to do it. I would put my arm out to pointing away from the midline of my body and say, “My name is Ryan.” If it tested strong I knew I was not presently reversed. If it tested weak I would then say, “I’m a loaf of bread.” If it tested strong I would know I am reversed, because I am obviously not a loaf of bread. To correct this, I would tap the karate chop point while repeating three times, “Even though I’m reversed, I deeply and completely accept myself.” In most instances this would immediately correct the reversal.
When you are in a situation or with a person where this method is not possible I advise surrogate testing. I have found that sliding my index finger pad across my thumb nail works great. It is inconspicuous and no one ever knows that I am doing it. When I make a statement and it is true my finger pad slides easily across my thumbnail. When it is false it stops abruptly in the middle.
For example, if I find myself in a communication breakdown and I don’t know if it is me or the other person that is reversed I first ask, “My name is Ryan.” If my finger slides easily over my thumbnail (indicating the statement was true) then I ask, “So and so is reversed.” If my finger stops dead in the middle of my thumbnail I have a fairly objective indication where the reversal lies. Sometimes to be safe I add another question: I’m deceiving myself." This helps me be certain about the surrogate testing.
Step 3: Flat Out Intentional EFT
Now to apply intentional EFT to correct a reversal requires a bit of concentration at first. If it is my own reversal I focus my attention on my karate chop point and feel it being tapped or I focus my attention on my sore spot area and feel it being rubbed. Then I mentally recite, ”Even though I’m reversed I deeply and completely accept myself.”
Then I either check in with my current state of mind in communicating with the person I am with or I muscle test myself again to see if I am myself and not a loaf of bread. I can usually tell immediately when the reversal passes, because I see the person I’m with in a less critical way. When in doubt I always use my thumbnail muscle testing technique.
If the other person is reversed based on observation and muscle testing they can be corrected in the same way. Give them your full attention. Either imagine a warm light pulsing on their karate chop point or imagine a warm light moving in a circular motion on their sore spot. Then mentally repeat, “Even though that person (or insert name) is reversed I deeply and completely accept them” three times. You can use any visualization you like.
A friend of mine imagines glowing flowers or crosses over the points as he recites the phrase and he admits this works just fine for him. Then, either watch their behavior for a shift or muscle test to see if that corrected the reversal. When you observe their behavior, you will know the reversal has passed when less of their “buttons are being pushed” for no reason.
Once reversals are corrected conversations usually flow a lot smoother. Again, it doesn’t matter what caused the reversal to correct it. It may be helpful to muscle test later to find out. This way it can be avoided in the future. All that is required to correct it is identification and focused intentional EFT.
With practice this becomes easier and easier. You will be surprised at how much better conversations go for everyone when you are around. You will also gain a richer sensitivity to when reversals are present. When they are, you will either rub everyone the wrong way, or someone else will rub you the wrong way for no apparently good reason.
Example: I went to Office Max to get some booklets printed for a class I was going to teach. I was having a fine day and was in a good mood. I walked up to the copy center clerk and as soon as he opened his mouth it just made me cringe a little inside. He wasn’t a bad guy, I just got the sense he was agitated at the world. So I tested to see who was reversed, and it wasn’t me. Then as he was processing my order I began applying the technique described above. Minutes later he was smiling and joking with me. The atmosphere felt much more at ease and less tense. My second test indicated no one was reversed in the area.
The next and final installment will relate a fully intentional EFT session carried out on the phone. By using the technique described above, emotions from a painful break up were resolved quickly as the client was driving back to the apartment where the break up took place. By the end of the session, the client was walking through the apartment gathering up his things without the overwhelming sadness or grief that was initially present. Until next time!
Ryan Kurczak