Mario sat twiddling his gloved fingers on an especially stormy night beside two of his best friends, Chef Torte and Yoshi. It was extremely boring that night, and the fire blazed and flickered, along with some really jazzing dancing, against the shadowy wall. Chef Torte finally broke the silence. "Vow, zhe ztupid announzer sure spendz a lot of time on ztupid detailz!"
Yoshi whimpered and sat up on his neat, red shoes. "Yoshi like the narrator, and Yoshi weally like him when he talk about Yoshi's stylish red shoes."
Chef Torte shook his PAN OF POWER (awe and ooh sounds are made) in the air near Yoshi's head. "Zat's because you are...VAIN! Yes, VAIN!"
Seeing that their boredness was driving them crazy, Mario started towards the door so he could soak himself in the rain instead of insults. As he opened the creaky (since it was creaky) door, a fine mist of water sprayed against him, causing him to flinch. Steady hearted, he continued out and shut the door. Upon the closing of the door, a full blast of rain blew him back, and through the dark, thundery night he could see a bubble-wrapped (muffled screams) envelope! He grasped it slowly and went back inside the house, finding Chef Torte and Yoshi and each other's throats. "Guys! I found a letter outside..."
They both said in unison, "So?"
Mario grimly said, "BUBBLE-WRAPPED!!!"
They both sat down to listen to him read it when that happened. Mario slit open the letter with a pointy-ended letter opener (scream). He then carefully read the note (listen and bark like a dog):
Dear Mario,
You don't know me (LUIGI!) and you've probably never met me. I'm here to tell you (LUIGI!) that a very special surprise awaits you at the old haunted house at "address witheld for censorship purposes". Go and get it at your own risk.
Signed,
The Mysterious "L" (gasp)
Mario gasped (like you audience people are SUPPOSED TO BE DOING). "Gosh, we should go check it out...I wonder who the mysterious sender is..."
Yoshi thoughtfully scratched his head. "Yoshi don't know; it's quite a mystery."
Chef Torte, on the other hand, couldn't believe his ears. "You all are fools! Can you all not zhee zat it iz Luigi! Zat ztupid plumber wannabe haz been trying to get us for yearz!"
Mario pounded Chef Torte with a big mallet (laugh). "Very funny; that could NEVER happen. You are such an idiot."
Yoshi giggled. "Yoshi think you're an idiot too...well, are we going?"
Mario nodded and threw the fire in the letter...er...the letter in the fire...BUT IT MISSED (gasps), so Mario retrieved it and put it back in. Mario jumped back as his flammable glove caught on fire. "AGGH! MY GLOVE! MAKE IT STOP!"
Yoshi licked the fire up. "Yoshi sorry it took so long. Yoshi just sometime forget you even exist."
LIGHTNING FLASH (scream)!!!!
The team of brave treasure hunters courageously stepped up to the haunted house at "address witheld for censorship purposes". Yoshi tapped on the door with his tongue, and it slowly, and with a great deal of creaking, opened to reveal black eternal stuff (hold breath). Mario gulped (gulp). "I hate black eternal stuff. It's so...eternal...and black...and stuff."
Chef Torte lit a candle (I guess he didn't get all the birthday orders he wanted) and stepped in. "Come on, lozers. Let's go find Luigi zo vhe can go back and get zome zleep!"
Mario looked over to see the bathroom on the right...it was a HALF bathroom (scream). Apparently for no reason at all, the toilet flushed (muffled screams) and a turtle with the initials "CK" walked out and left (scream). Mario fainted.
Chef Torte exploded right then and there. "Zat's it! Zhis ztory iz zo fake! Zhis haz to be zhe lowest budget horror movie I've evair seen in my life! I'm leaving."
Yoshi started to cry and the camera zoomed in and out of his face. "But...Mario will die...and that letter...it will haunt us forever."
Chef Torte grabbed Yoshi by the neck. “Zat plumber is faking. Zhe only zhing zat vill haunt you for zhe rest of your life iz me if you don’t follow me back! Come on!”
Suddenly, a voice sounding remarkably like a certain plumber named “Luigi” boomed, “This is the mysterious sender! BOO!” (jump) “You are wrong. I’m not-a Luigi. In fact, my name doesn’t even begin with-a the letter “L.”
Chef Torte dropped Yoshi. “Yez it doez! Your letter zaid you vhere zhe mysterious “L.”
Yoshi started crying and started throwing fruit seeds over his back. “No, Chef Torte! You’ll awaken his ghostliness, and he’ll do things to us that aren’t happy and pleasant!”
The voice, still sounding like Luigi’s, boomed forth again. “Listen to the dino-a. Is-a not Luigi and Is-a not …uh…well…I guess that’s it….BOO!” (scream)
Chef Torte threw the PAN OF POWER (oohs and awes) up in the ceiling, and Ludwig Von Koopa fell down. “Dang it, ya got me!”
Chef Torte’s eyes bugged open, and Mario and Yoshi were once again calm. “It veally izn’t Luigi! But…but…you’re lettair! It zaid LUIGI constantly!”
Yoshi chuckled. “We knew it wasn’t Luigi the whole time. Chef Torte is such an idiot.”
Mario nodded. “Yeah, idiot!”
Chef Torte laughed it off. “Yez, zat vas all good fun. Now, vhy did you try to act like such a lozer as Luigi?”
Ludwig opened his eyes and slowly opened him mouth… “Because…I’m his biggest fan!” Lighting flashed! (scream)
Chef Torte’s eyes opened wide. “Luigi…has…a..fan?”
They all screamed bloody murder and ran out of the house.
Inside, “Ludwig” took off his mask. “Hehe, my brother and-a his friends are so stupid!”
THE END (clap and laugh)
Go back to the Castle Grounds from here.