Date

Some of the thousands *cough* of fan *cough again* mail we get every day...

Email	Reply
Date: Fri, 16 Apr 2004 23:02:50 -0600 From: "Sondra Payne" <paynese@comcast.net> To: ihatepurpleivy@yahoo.com Subject: joe hi my name is joe i fight sharks for a living....one day my boss came by and said..joe are you busy? i said no.. fight the shark with you reight hand plz.. and so on and so forth	Dear Sondra... not much on a formal introduction eh? thats fine runs off and update joe... i hate to break it to you but that has been there for months now...bah where have you been? :-P
Date: Mon, 07 Jun 2004 13:02:44 -0600 From: "Carol Payne" <payneca23@comcast.net> To: ihatepurpleivy@yahoo.com Subject: Responses to stuff you can't live without! Hi lol, these are my mom's replies. 1. How do you know for sure the porcupine is floating and not treading water? 2. How is the memory span of a goldfish determined? And how does it relate to the memory span of a red fish, blue fish, black fish old, fish and new fish? 3. Rabbits can't vomit but they can sneeze with their eyes open! 4. If a shrimp's heart is in it's head, does that mean it's brain is in it's stomach or are shrimp like starfish? 5. Grapes explode in the microwave only if you turn it on, otherwise they shrivel into raisins. 6. What does soap grow? Wings? 7. I knew the multiplication problem, and abou the Canadian $2 bill flag. But did you know that drunk ants always fall on their right sides? muahaha!	Dear Concerned Parents of America: acually...before i address the parents i want to say to everyone else..that these are the ppl that make this site go round :-P i mean heck how many of you would question someone with such a lack of intelligence as myself about flying soap?! ok back to the reply: Ok lets see what i can do about these... 1. have you ever seen a dead porcupine treading water? ...neither have i but still! 2. are you racist?! man...dont be hate'n ...what did that poor black fish ever do to you?! 3. tis tru but then again i said "It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open." i have met you in person and your not a rabbit...sigh silly kids...tricks are for rabbits! 4. bah a brain in the stomach?! find out a few facts before you mock me... shrimp dont have a stomach...the closest thing to a stomach is the foregut which is basically like everything from the chewing to the intestine for the hard food... and then you have the midgut and hindgut which is for the digestion of chemicals that could be in the food... 5. sarcasm will get you... everywhere.... 6. actually legs...but only when you arnt lookin... 7. well it is kinda hard to be left handed if you have 3 arms....and....well not really any real hands either for that matter...and who the heck would get a ant drunk?! what a waste of a perfectly good draft....
Date: Mon, 2 Aug 2004 14:53:39 -0400 From: "The Schmidt Family" <schmidtfam@earthlink.net> To: ihatepurpleivy@yahoo.com Subject: breaking the ice cycles Hey mano man this is P-money Payton keepin in real. Site looks good but if is were use i'd put some crazy flash junk in ther. Yea man. Seriously. Rock hardness. Most def man. Sorry i'm random. P-money Payton	Dear...Payton... ...whats P-Money? is that like E-money? shrugs sry but i only deal in american dollars...o well ill answer this one for free...or...try to....have you ever had one of those moments where there just arent any words?...well neither have i but i was just makin' sure...anyway on the index page theres a quote....well...it was just a note...now its a quote...cuz...im gonna quote the note...so its noted quote...or...something...either way just note the quote that im noteing...n...stuff... "As a side note...I kept the neatness of the site to a bare minimum to keep the size of the site down bcuz we are just poor bums with nothing to do sep make up crap and put it on the internet for free :) thanks and have a gr8 day..." AKA. one page with flash would fill up my entire free server and i would hafta start paying...so untill you ppl start paying to see this site...or i get bord with the free one and go make a REAL site...youll hafta deal with the bland site :) have a nice day P.S. your email was off the He-Z...keep it frizzad with the trizzad...n....stuff...
Date: Sun, 11 Jul 2004 22:19:21 -0400 From: "Pam Mosley" <bear@scottsburg.com> To: ihatepurpleivy@yahoo.com Subject: I really LOLED Hey J.B. This is the funniest sight I really loled. I'm loving all the fans you have. And I want to know your password to your Journal. It was funny I typed in PurpleIvy and it said sorry I knew you would type password. And get this I did not even type password. It was so funny. and the silly rabits trixs are for kids. It was so funny. I was diggin that one girls ?'s and even more your anwers. You need to add to the wall of sayings the Beach Ball and Wanna Dance. That would "So totally Rock....Squirt" I love the web site keep up the hysterical stuff. My mom was wondering what I was laughing at. You're kool and yet you're kool for Jesus! Your Friend in Christ -Laura	...im kool... tear thats the....most...nicest thing anyone has ever said to me starts ballin all over the place...regains composure anyway....where was i? oh yea... Dear Laura...wait a sec!!! rereads the email !!! O_o! cant believe you! pfffff to you... looks over at carols mom your getting complements and its not even your flippin site!!! bah! o well non the less the email must go on!! ok lets start from the top...fans...looks around and sees two guys sitting behind me on bleachers oh them?! ha i hired them to sit there and be fans :) but thanks tho ^_^ and wow...im dumbfounded by all the ppl who cant get into my journal...i mean c'mon ppl! i sat there and TOLD YOU the password...sigh if only the rest of the world thought like i did...o well goes off to finish upd8ing th erest of the site
Date: Fri, 02 Jul 2004 13:58:49 -0500 From: "******** *******" <udontnome23@hotmail.com> To: ihatepurpleivy@yahoo.com Subject: what joe should do next hey... i've been a fan of the site ever since i ran across it! and i was thinking about what joe should do next... so heres my idea... how about lettin joe deliver pizza? haha... u know how it'll go... =Þ later	Dear....oh groans i h8 it when they dont leave a name...lets see we will call you... Joklyn Von.....Hombl....ger... yea...has been watching too much sb woah! a real unhired fan! ...thats...touching...can i get a autograph? cuz that would be super!...anyway joe n pizzas eh? we can prolly work that in... y'know...i never sign the bloody emails....im gonna sign this one to throw everyone off... :-P Jay. Bee.

I wish i had a dime for every email i get...eventually i could afford a gumball...

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