You Are My Clone(c)

by nANCI mEEK 2/96 (to the tune "Send In The Clowns")

(actors wear Michel Keaton T-shirts, same clothes, wig, wardrobe)

SCENE opens with two sitting playing checkers, obviously bored, game at a stalemate)

Nanci: So what'd you guys think of that movie?
ALL: Talented Mr. Ripley?
Joely: I liked it
OTHERS: Me too.
Joely: You wanna watch multiplicity with
OTHERS: Michael Keaton?
Nanci: Not again. We've seen it
OTHERS: 12 times already.
ANN: Besides I think I like Andy Garcia better.
OTHERS: Me too.
Joely: Why do you keep playing checkers. Noone's gonna win. We're Clones!
ANN: Relax.(pause) It must be our time of the month.
NANCI: Oh Rocco's lab called last night and they made another clone.
OTHERS: Great! Another me!
NANCI: Another You? What about another me?
ANN: Another me....Us....whatever.

Joely: That's all there is......US!

MUSIC begins:

Nanci

Isn't it weird? I'm now a pair

Joely

I can be standing right here and I'm over there

ALL

We are a clone

Joely

You are a bitch, just like myself

ANN

Just got a call from the lab there's one more off the shelf

ALL

They made one more clone, never alone!

Joely

I like myself Am I a queer

Nanci

I thought I'd throw a surprise party for me this year

ANN

We wear the same clothes, our men we can share

Nanci

But I can't hide my gifts

Joely

'cause I'll find them there

ALL

Have the same face

Have the same hair

We walk down the street side by side - And everyone stares

ANN

I am my own clone

Joely

And I really snore

Nanci

I'm at my front door

ANN

When will it stop Can't get any sleep

Nanci

Both of us up half the night counting Dolly the sheep

ALL

Calling myself on the phone to hear what I have to say

Asking myself "How was my day?"

Joely

Isn't it weird - I'm my own mirror

Nanci

I thought that I'd want what I want - Am I still here?

ANN

And where is my clone? Have you seen my clone?

ALL

Don't bother, I'm here!

-nm