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No
Pork! No Pork! (c)
by nANCI
mEEK 10/96
(sung to the tune "New York New York")
My
Mother's a jew
My father is not
I've been confused about God
Since I was a tot
Dad won't eat mom's fish
Mom won't eat Dads pork
Dad's roman catholic devout
He roams in He roams out
I've wanted to wake up from this nightmare
Since I was Two
Has the Messiah been here? Will he be back?
Oy, wasn't Jesus a Jew?
These Judeo-Christian blues
Are driving me mad
And Mom keeps yelling at Dad
"No Pork! No Pork!"
I have sins to confess
Am I half a princess
If I sneeze - They both say "God Bless!"
My weekends, my weekends are shot
Sabbath in Temple; Sundays in Mass
I'm wearin' a star and a cross
(Hey Rabbi! Hey Father!)
When do I fast?
These Judeo-Christian Blues
Are driving me mad
I know when I'm good, And I know when I'm bad
Were those three men really so wise
Will my big brother be circumcised
My mom's a Jew who won't eat pork!
No pork!
(Happy Hannukah! Merry Christmas!)
  Sinatra Family Web
I
Broke Wind!(c)
by nANCI mEEK 10/95
(to the tune "Summer Wind")
When
I broke wind it came blowing in
from across the room
It lingered there, scorched your hair
Oh some perfume
All summer long you'd toot your song
while we strolled
downwind uphill
Two sweethearts...until I
broke wind
Think you have a right to blast them all night
because your a man
Well here's a lament whoever smelt it dealt
it now go get a fan
How could you think, that mine
wouldn't stink well honey, I'm only human
And I lost you, I lost you when I broke wind
Couldn't hold it in - And I
broke wind - And now your gone
And to this day this
lonely day - I'll blame it on the Dog
And guess who
repents her flatulence for days that never end
My
fickle friend! Since I broke wind...
Mmmm I broke wind
I BROKE WIND!
Know
Why This Song Is So Funny?
What Kind of a farter are YOU?
  
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