AJ sat on his bed with a cigarette in his hand, he was fighting off the urge to call Chrissy.  He hadn't talked to her for a few days, and all he had done was stay in his house, moping up and down the living room floor, and watching television.  AJ didn't answer the phone, and he certainly didn't go out, so, there he sat, on the edge of his bed with the phone in his hand.  He began to punch in her numbers, but quickly hung up, throwing  the phone on the bed and laying back, taking a deep drag off his cigarette.  He looked up at the ceiling and thought about her, he missed the smell of her hair, and the feel of it as it would brush against his face sometimes.  The more he thought about her, the more he began to smile willing him to pick up the phone again, but then the vision of her and Josh floated into his mind.  AJ slammed his eyes shut and took a deep breath.  The vision faded and he threw the phone on the floor, taking another drag off his cigarette.  He sat up and stubbed it out in his overflowing ashtray, laying  back down on the bed and closing his eyes, shutting out the world again.
 

         Chrissy was washing dishes and listening to the radio, she unconsciously began to sing along to some random Michael Bolton song that played, but quickly shook it out of her head.  There is no way I know any Michael Bolton songs.  She thought with a shrug of her shoulders, continuing to sing, at least it keeps my mind off of AJ.  Then, she started thinking about him and everything that had happened.  Chrissy sighed and began washing her pan with extreme force, she was so into her dishes that she almost didn't hear the knock at the door.  Chrissy thought about ignoring it, but thought it might be AJ, at least she hoped it was.  She left the dish in the sink and wiped her hands, walking quickly to the door.

    Chrissy tucked her hair behind her ears and opened the door.  Her heart sank to her feet.

     “What are you doing here?”

     “Chris, we need to talk,” Josh said as he pushed his way into her apartment.  Chrissy stared at him as he sat down on her couch.

     “Umm, well, what exactly did you wanna talk about? Cuz, I’m really busy,” she said as she made her way back to her dishes.  She began to furiously scrub the same pot and just wished Josh would get the hint and leave.  He didn't.

     “Ya know,” he said as he walked into the kitchen.  “I think we need to talk.”  Chrissy stopped scrubbing.

     “About what?”

     “About us Chris,” he said.  Chrissy had to stifle her laughter.

     “Us? What do you mean? What us?”  Josh stared at her.

     “I mean, US, what do you think I mean?”

     “Like, us as in friends?”  Chrissy was definitely lost.

     “Well,” he began, but Chrissy cut him off.

     “Cuz, if that's what you're asking about, I can pretty much guarantee we both screwed that one up pretty good,” she said as she crossed her arms and walked out of the kitchen.  Josh followed her like a lost puppy.

     “Well, I was talking about a different us Chris.  I was thinking about the us from the other night,” Josh said as he grabbed Chrissy’s arm.  She whipped around quickly and yanked her arm away.

     “Well, Josh, give up.  There's no us,” she said flatly.  She stood with her arms crossed and stared at anything but Josh.  He looked at her like she was crazy.

     “Well, what was the other night then? What was that?”

     “A stupidity takeover?”  Josh shook his head.

     “What's the fuck does that mean?” he asked.    Chrissy chuckled a little.

     “Josh, you know exactly what it means.  That night was a huge mistake.  I was upset and drunk, and you just happened to be there.  There is no us,” she said as she shook her head.  Josh got closer to her, but she moved out of his way.  Anger burned in  his eyes.

     “Chris, why are you trying to say the other night didn't mean anything?”  Chrissy stared at him incredulously.

     “Josh, are you serious?  What do you think the other night meant?”  She was interested in hearing his response.  The only thing she remembered about the night was the overwhelming guilt.  She had tried to push the memory out of her mind, but wasn't very successful at it.  Josh looked at Chrissy and then at the ground, and then back up at her.

     “Well, I,” he swallowed.  “I thought it was a start to something else,” Josh said with a hopeful gleam in his eye.  Chrissy shook her head.

     “Josh, it never should have happened.”

     “C’mon, you don't mean that,” he said as he got closer to Chrissy.  This time, she didn't move.

     “Josh, it was a stupid mistake.  It never should have happened.”

     “Chrissy, I know you don't really feel that way.  You saw what that asshole was doing.  He used you, and then when he got what he wanted, he ran off and got it from someone else.”  Josh began getting closer and closer to her.  He touched her shoulder and began running his fingers down her arm.  Chrissy’s skin felt like it would crawl right off her bones.  She jerked her body away from him.

     “Josh, shut up.”  Chrissy hurriedly tried to get away from Josh.  She walked to the opposite end of the couch from him.  He began to get closer to her.

     “What are you running away for?”

     “Josh. Why are you telling me this? You have no idea what went on with AJ and me.  I can't believe I even thought you would actually care about me.  Was the goal of your friendship to just get into my pants?

     “How can you say that Chrissy?  You know you wanted it just as much as I did,” he said bitterly.

     “Are you fucking kidding me?”  Chrissy felt her heart start racing.  “You manipulated my feelings.  I should have seen it coming!  You've been acting really weird since AJ came into my life!”

     “Chrissy, I’m a guy, and I know assholes.  He's someone you don't need.  I could be so much better for you,” he said as he went in for a kiss, but Chrissy jerked out of his way.

     “Josh! Don't you fucking EVER do that again!”

     “Chris, you need to learn to relax a little more.  C’mon, you and I both wanted it to happen the other night.  And, if you were so happy with Alex, you wouldn't have been so eager to rip my pants off, would you?”  Josh chuckled and sat down on the couch.

     “The only thing I was eager to do with you was talk. I don't say I’m not guilty because I know I am.  But, you told me he didn't love me, and for some fucked up reason, I believed you!”

     “Why are you being like this?  I told you what you wanted to hear.  You wanted to believe it Chrissy.  If you loved him as much as you said you did, you would have trusted him, but it was quite obvious you didn't.  You wanted me that night, and whether you like it or not, what happened the other night was because of you.”  Josh raised his eyebrow and smiled a little.  He folded his arms across his chest and waited for Chrissy to say something.  The anger was building inside of Chrissy.  It felt like it was quaking in her soul and if she opened her mouth, she might spew like Linda Blair in “The Exorcist”.  She stood and stared at Josh for a minute trying to think of something to say instead of screaming obscenities at him.

     “Fuck you Josh!” He laughed a little.

     “Already did that hon,” Josh said with a smile

     “You used me, you asshole!”

     “Oh, and you didn't use me?”  Chrissy didn't have anything to say to that.  He got up off the couch and came close to her.

     “Josh, get the hell away from me,” she said as she forcefully pushed him away.  He shook his head.

     “Stop denying your feelings Chrissy.  Yeah, maybe you love AJ, but you definitely want me,” he said.  He got closer to her again, but she pushed him away again.

     “You are a fucking delusional.  Get the fuck out of here now!” she screamed.

     “The only reason you're so mad at me is because you know what I’m telling you is the truth.  You and him don't match up well.  He's better than you Chrissy.  What would he want with a whore like you?”  Chrissy jerked forward and slapped Josh as hard as she could across his face.

   “Get the fuck out of my apartment!”  Josh tried to get close again.  She pushed him away again and slugged him in the stomach.  “If you don't get the fuck out of here now I will scream until someone comes up here.  Leave now!”  She jerked open the door and waited for Josh to leave.

     “Chris, Ill be here when you come to your senses.”  Chrissy rolled her eyes and pushed him out of her door frame.  She slammed the door on him and stood against the door.  Chrissy’s body felt like it had been wrung from any sort of happiness.  The words Josh said, calling her a whore, stung.  She stood against the door, and felt the flood of tears start rolling down her cheeks.  Chrissy started to shake and she slid down to the floor and sobbed.

     “I’m so sorry Alex,” she sobbed.
 

        AJ sat in his car outside Chrissy’s apartment complex.  He had been there for about twenty minutes, but he just didn't know if he should go up and talk to her.  He lit a cigarette and decided after his smoke, he would go up and talk to her.  AJ nervously inhaled and exhaled.  Finally, he was done.  He hopped out of his car and walked quickly up to the door when he saw Josh coming out.  AJ froze, staring at Josh.  Josh smiled and walked over.

     “Hey man, what's up?” Josh asked nonchalantly.  AJ just shook his head and began to walk inside.  Josh smiled.

     “Oh hey, AJ, Chrissy might not be ready for you just yet.  I was up there for about an hour and a half, and I think she's pretty tired now.  She's somethin’ else,” he said with a smile.    “Well, take it easy,” Josh said as he walked away.  AJ stood and just stared at him walking away.  He took in a deep breath and then stared at the door.  Visions of Chrissy and Josh floated into his mind again.  He shook his head.

     “Fuck this,” he said as he walked back to his car.  AJ got in, and drove off, looking at her apartment in his rearview mirror.

Lyrics Taken From:
"The Last Time" Rolling Stones
Written by: Jagger/Richards
© 1966 PGD