Nick turned around slowly.  He was afraid to look into her eyes, to see everything he enjoyed about her reflected out of them, knowing what he was going to say.
 
    "What are you doing here Kayla?" He finally muttered, still looking away, at the floor, his feet, anything but her.

    "I called." She said somberly.   "I came over to make sure you were okay.  I thought you were coming by when you woke up?" Kayla said.

    "Yeah, I'm sorry I forgot about that, I was out on the boat all day." He tried to hide the emotion in his voice, to just act like he had really forgotten he was supposed to go over, but what was he going to say?

    "What's wrong Nick?  What happened?" She said stepping closer to him.

    "Nothing's wrong.  I just...."

    "Nick what is it?"

    "Something did happen today."

    "What?" He could hear the worry in her voice, the trepidation in her touch when she reached out and touched him.  He flinched when her hand landed on his arm, and he watched as a flash of questions ran through her mind.

    "Come sit down with me Kay." He said grabbing ahold of her hand.

    "Nick, you're freaking me out.  Is everything okay?"

    "Everything's....." He wanted to say everything was fine, but it wasn't.  It couldn't be.  "I just.......I can't......I don't know how to say it."

    "Then just spit it out."

    "Jenna's back." He blurted at her insistence, she didn't move, or make a sound, so he continued.  "We're gonna give it another shot."  Nick finally looked her in the eyes, eyes that turned to stone as the words came out of his mouth.   He could see her jaw clench tightly, but she didn't say anything.  She just stood up from the couch and walked towards the front door.  Her silences said more than anything to him, they always did.

    "Kayla wait!" Nick yelled, confusion washing over him.  "Don't leave like this?"

    "Don't leave like what Nick?  Pissed off?  Were you waiting for me to cry over you?  Because it isn't going to happen.   Goddammit I knew you'd do this.  I knew it." She said in frustration, pulling the door open.

    "Kayla, I'm sorry!" He said following her out the door.

    "You're sorry?  No I'm the one who's sorry Nick.  I'm sorry I ever bothered with you, I'm sorry I let myself get close to you.  I'm sorry I wasted even a small portion of my life with someone like you.  Someone who just tramples on everyone's feelings because the only person to matters to you is you!" She yelled as she unlocked the door to her car.

    "Kayla you matter to me." He said pushing the car door shut before she could get in.

    "No I don't.  I was just a rental car until you got your old one back from the shop.  Why did you have to prove him right?"

    "Prove who right?"

    "AJ."

    "What does AJ have to do with anything?"  Kayla laughed.

    "He told me you'd do this, that you always hurt the people who are around you and I didn't believe him.  I told him you were different and that he should stop judging you on what you did in the past.  You just had to prove him right, now I have to see that smug fucking smile every time I see him. Get out of my way." She said pushing him hard.  Nick stumbled onto the lawn, but got up in time to stop her from closing the door.

    "So where is your precious Jenna Nick?  Aren't you wasting valuable time away from her?"

    "Kayla I don't want it to end like this." He said trying to coax her from the car.  "Please stay, just let me explain."

    "There's nothing to stay for." She said quietly as she tried to pull the door shut, he wouldn't let her.  "Nick you just told me you're going back to Jenna.  What do you expect me to do jump up and down with joy?"

    "No, I just...." He trailed off, he didn't know what he expected.  He didn't have time to think about any of it.  His hand pulled from the door as she threw the car into reverse and pulled out of the driveway, almost knocking him down with the open car door.  He stood back and let her leave, watching her as long as he could see the lights of her car and staying outside for awhile, wondering if he had made the right choice.
 

        Kayla finally came home late that night, depressed, dejected and wishing the bars stayed open all night.  It had taken her hours, and a few glasses of white wine to finally admit how much he'd hurt her, how much she really cared about him.  He had broken her heart, and she hated that she let it happen, that she let her guard down and forgot that deep down she had known Nick still loved Jenna.

She looked towards Sam's room and no lights were on, she had no one to talk to, no one to turn to.  Kayla went into the kitchen hunting for something to eat, the stale pretzels that sat on the bar were the closest thing to sustenance she had had all day, and the big ball in her stomach told her any food would probably make her sick, but she needed to eat something.   She pulled a box of cereal from the cupboard and poured the last of the frosted flakes into a big bowl.  Kayla paused as she reached for the milk, a picture of her and Nick staring back at her, pinned to the door by a banana shaped magnet.   She bit down hard on her teeth and pulled it off the refrigerator, shoving it quickly into the drain of the sink letting the garbage disposal chew it up and swallow it down.  Kayla turned off the water and shut off the disposal switch and went back to the fridge, pulling out the carton of milk that rested in the door.  She shook it lightly, it was empty.  Tears began streaming down Kayla's face as she threw the empty milk carton in the garbage, the first tears she had cried all day.

    "Kay what's wrong?" She heard as she turned to face her roommate Sam, probably woken up by the noisy garbage disposal.  "Why are you crying."

    "We're out of milk." She cried, trying to wipe the tears from her face as she poured the dried flakes back into the box and threw her bowl in the sink.

    "You're crying cause we have no milk?" She said, with a raised eyebrow.   Kayla didn't respond.

    "I'm going to bed." Kayla said walking past her roommate and into her room, turning on the light.   A heavy heart and a pounding headache were  crying for sleep, beckoning her to the bed, she wasn't hungry anymore, the ball that had been in her stomach had only gotten bigger.   She changed into an old T-shirt and stood at her vanity, unclasping her necklace and setting it down next to the others.  She picked up the song he had written her when he was in Europe.  reading over the words, line by line.  Sentiment by sentiment.  All it's meaning and emotion changing for her.

    "This was probably about her." She said as more tears racked her body.  Kayla crumpled the paper she had so protectively kept and threw it on the floor.

She had loved him.

She'd loved his friendship, and what she thought was her love for him, and he destroyed it.  He shattered any ounce of trust she had in her own feelings.  Silent tears dripped from her eyes as she shut out the lights and laid down on the bed, eyeing the water globe that sat next to her on the bedside table.  It's melody had put her to sleep on so many occasions, and as she sat on her bed tonight winding it up,  listening to it's song, she slipped deeper and deeper into overwhelming sadness.   Kayla curled into a ball and shut her eyes, tears still spilling from beneath the lids, blocking the faint light that emulated within the watery confines.   She wasn't lulled to sleep tonight, every tinkling note reminded her of her own foolishness, and of Nick and what she had opened herself up to when everyone had told her it was a mistake.

    As the music wound down and the little lights faded to darkness Kayla thrust the globe from her grasp as hard as she could, hearing it smash on the floor below, the sound of it's dying music mingling with the shattering glass and her broken heart.

Chapter 11

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