“How’s everything?”

“Toshiya is not talking to me, we are not in good terms, …he sees me as some kind of disease. Everywhere he goes, as long as I happen to be there, he will walk away”

“Kaoru is talking very little these days”

“Toshiya does the same…”

Three of them sighed audibly and looked at each other.

“We can’t practice if things go on like this” Shinya commented, pouting. Die gave him a look, “Really, Shinya. That will be the last thing to talk about right now” said he, which earned him a glare from the younger one, “That is the most important thing to talk about! We must go on with our music ne, Die kun”

“We can use it as an excuse…” Kyo suddenly spoke up, “Kaoru values us so much he will do anything for the band”

“I tried that already…he said he needed a break”

“How about the fans?”

“He did not reply when I mentioned it”

“The contract?”

“He shrugged”

“The producers?”

“He left the room”

Die frowned, “Shinchan, I really find it most annoying when you answer questions in such fashion”

“It’s the fact…it happened just like that”

“But you don’t have to-”

“PLEASE….we don’t need another couple bickering-”

“We are NOT couples!!!”

…

Shinya sighed, “Ne, I will talk to Kaoru …I’d be more direct this time” he looked at Die, “I find the remix interesting. Don’t you?”

Kyo and Die smiled at that, “It’s creative. So very Toshiya to come up with something like that heh?” they started to laugh, but then Die faltered, “Nah, not expected the way Kaoru put it, but that sort of thinking, the playfulness, …you know…” he shrugged. Shinya nodded, “Hai. I think Kaoru must do something” he looked at Kyo.

“I agree. He started it first. I kind of feel that Kaoru owes an apology”

“He will never do that”

“Please show some optimism here Die kun”

“It’s the fact…” Die snickered at Shinya, who happened to glare and blush at the same time. Kyo rolled his eyes at that, “Really guys, your getting back at each other will be the last thing that should happen right now. Which…by the way…what caused it?”

Shinya lifted his chin and looked at Die, “He said I swam like a crocodile”

Kyo gave Die a look

“Hey! It’s true!”

“Crocodiles don’t look bony” Kyo muttered, “They’re big and scary”

“I’m not bony!”

“No! I mean…” Die thought for a while, “You know the way he swims, he just floats like a tree trunk…”

Kyo looked at Die as if he had just said the weirdest thing on earth. Shinya did the same.

“Fine, anything, Shinya looks weird when he swims. Crocodiles also do that… just float and make you think it’s a tree branch. He’s so skinny! It’s just so weird, his back so bony!”

Kyo rolled his eyes, “You mean fragile?”

Die paused

…

“No”

“Then?”

“I’m strong!”

Kyo looked at Shinya “Why take it so seriously?”

“Die looks worse when he swims”

“OH! Did you hear that Kyo? Hey, I’m the athletic one…”

“Sheesh…”

“Really guys…”

“By image! You’re so skinny now!”

Kyo smiled, amused by the two, as always. Swimming eh? What was Die up to now? Provoking Shinya like this, about this swimming subject. He could already tell what came next. True enough, Shinya proceeded to throw the red head a challenge.

“Saturday, 4 pm, the swimming club near the studio”

“Deal”

Looked like Die was more than happy to take up the challenge. He took it more as an …offer? Kyo playfully narrowed his eyes at Die, who was all grin and excitement. One look at him Kyo could so tell the guitarist was really up to something. Shinya said his goodbyes and left the room, leaving the other two all alone. The red head lit a cigarette, complaining that he still couldn’t believe of all those years being in the same band together with Shinya… “I’m serious. If you pay attention Kyo, I will try not to smoke when Shinya is in the same room with me…just when he’s in the room… am I nice or what?” he laughed in disbelief

“Well, somethings you get used to…” Kyo glanced at Die, suggestively smiling, “Like what I saw just now…charming development I must say…” Kyo raised an eyebrow, “When did you swim together? SO free huh? While I get headaches thinking about the rest of us…” Kyo said sarcastically.

Die shrugged

“What kind of approach is that?!!! Say if you really wanna see him clothes off, just say it!!! It’s Shinya! If you’re scared of his reaction, don’t worry! It’s Shinya! He won’t give you any!!!” Kyo blurted out in disbelief, and stared at the red head

Die shook his head

“What r u up to huh? So now it’s Shinya?” Kyo asked. Die shook his head more and waved his hand, “No, this is just pure challenge. Shinya was so proud when he talked about it. Don’t you know he just started? It’s not that nice, …boasting in front of the sportsman in the band…makes me really wanna see” Die reasoned

“Hm”

“What Hm?”

Kyo fell silent for a while, before looking at Die in disbelief

“Crocodile?”

The red head laughed

***

“Die is such a baka”

Shinya threw his bag on the couch and glared at it, as if it was Die.

…

He picked it up and put it nicely on the table. Scratching his arm, Shinya walked to the kitchen and drank a glass of water.

***

“I’m too lazy”

“Hm but I must talk to you”

Kaoru sighed tiredly and rolled to his right. He squinted his eyes to look at the alarm clock by the bed.

“It’s late”

“I know”

…

No point reasoning. Shinya was like him during deadlines

“Fine. Give me like…an hour. I just woke up from my sweet slumber, no thanks to you I look like shit”

“No need”

“Why?”

“I’m right in front your door”

Kaoru sat up abruptly and ran to the bathroom. After washing his face, he put on a T-shirt and opened the door. Shinya blinked innocently and smiled a little. Kaoru sighed and let him in.

“I should have known getting a PHONE CALL from Shinya sama!!!! Shinya who hates phone calls!!!”

Shinya sat on a couch, “I thought it was quite obvious, didn’t you hear noises from the corridor outside?”

“No, I was SLEEPING”

“Oh, well…”

“What?”

“You wouldn’t hear any even if you didn’t sleep”

“How come?”

“Becuz I didn’t make any noise”

Kaoru gave out a frustrated sigh, “Shinya, if you’re here to make talk to Toshiya, the thing you’ve been doing for the past five days…give it up! I’m not in the mood for that!”

“What mood are you in?”

“Sleep mood, rest…relax…”

“I won’t pester you anymore…” Shinya pouted

“Good”

…

Kaoru stared at Shinya who quietly sat on the couch, confusedly, “What am I supposed to do with you sitting there like this?”

Shinya gave him a shrug, “I don’t know…read a book?”

***

Kaoru placed the book slowly on the coffee table and turned his head to the right. Shinya was sitting beside him, eyes staring intently. For the past three hours, he didn’t say a single word. He didn’t even make any noise. Shinya was right when he said he wouldn’t try to persuade or convince Kaoru to talk to Toshiya. He just merely stared and stared at the older man for three hours.

“Okay…” Kaoru spoke up, “What is it that you want Shinya?”

“Nothing”

“You can’t just sit here and do nothing but stare at me for nothing! You want me to talk to Toshiya don’t you?” Kaoru asked.

“No. I just want you to go to the studio from tomorrow onwards and act as if nothing had happened”

Kaoru looked at him in disbelief, “After all those shit that happened? You want me to pretend as if NOTHING is going on?! Shinya…” he shook his head and turned away. Shinya suddenly held him arm, “Kaoru, what makes you think we’re doing right now?”

…

“Aren’t we closing our eyes?”

…

“Kyo, Die and I tried not to think about what had happened between you two but we couldn’t just abandon it! I’m sure you can’t too…that’s why you’ve been missing in action for a week right?”

Kaoru moved his arm away from Shinya’s hold.

“You feel guilty don’t you?”

The older man widened his eyes and looked at Shinya…

“Guilty?”

“Hai”

“What makes you think I’m guilty?! What makes you think I’m the wrong here? Shinya, Maybe I’m hurt!” Kaoru hissed

“You think Toshiya wasn’t?”

…

“By whatever you said to him, in front of all of us?”

Kaoru fell silent

“You know you’ve hurt him the way no one could. Not because of the words themselves …it was the PERSON who said it” Shinya entwined his fingers together, “Kaoru kun, we are only asking you to talk to him… sort things out”

“Yeah…” Kaoru took a deep breath, “I don’t think there is anything to talk about….is there?”

“There is”

“Like what?”

“Things that he thought happened that didn’t?”

…

Kaoru smiled bitterly

***

In his bedroom that morning, Shinya sent a fax to Kyo

***

“Shinya sent me a fax…a weird fax”

“Sometimes he IS weird”

“Ne, Die…Shinya said he might had succeeded in making Kaoru talk to Toshiya. I don’t know, It’s written in the fax”

…

“Kyo, you think it’s my fault that they had this fight?”

The blond sighed and stared at the fax paper on his hand, “I don’t know, why don’t you tell me?”

“You know I slept with him right? And I told Kaoru…maybe Kaoru wasn’t too happy with that and somehow they had a fight! It’s driving me insane, thinking all those words we heard from Kaoru’s mouth hurting Toshiya so much. And he said them because he thought him cheap sleeping with me?”

Kyo joined his eyebrows, “Die, Kaoru and Toshiya didn’t have a relationship. This might be the last time I’m telling you this. Whatever happens, Kaoru doesn’t have the right to insult him that way. We all know that! They were not lovers, so Toshiya can fuck anyone he wants…”

Die sighed, “So Kaoru’s jealous?”

“Maybe he’s just possessive”

“Maybe he loves Toshiya?”

Die gasped and repeated

“HE LOVES Toshiya!!!”

“I’m not so sure about that”

“Oh, maybe they’re in love with each other…”

…

“Do you know what Toshiya is going through now?” Kyo suddenly asked, “For a person in love, he’s doing great! That boy’s fasting, worse than your diet. Three days ago he called and said he had gastric problem. He lived with me for a while, and he never had gastric pain before. The only thing he consumes is that damn lime juice. I don’t know where he got it…. But I’ll make sure Kaoru knows about this!”

***