VORTA COOKERY The art of delicious kosher and vegetarian cooking with Kavanuts and Rippleberries

Receipes and cookery tips by Ma Shea's Little Boy Blue.

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Most pictures on these pages are from the fantastic homepage of the German Jeffrey Combs Fan Club, thanks a bunch!

Ah - cooking .... How wonderful to see that even today, in the century of replicated food, there are people out there still interested in  the art of cooking. Good. Goody goody goody! Lemme give you a few tips first, followed up by some recipes which you should try out. We chose some easy-to-follow receipes, they are all 100% vegetarian and 100% kosher, which means they are all animals favorits, specially the pink ones.

Watch out who's cooking! Who's cooking is almost as important as what's cooking! If the cook is a questionable character like the guy on the left, you'd rather go for the replimat. He's able to serve you Klingon Ghu'Kar as Kavanuts, and will most probably ruin your meal with anecdotes about his life. So be careful.

"Lizzards tongue and eye of newt ... "

Watch out whom you invite! Not everybody is a suitable partner for a nice evening in with a self cooked five course menue - if the guy opposite you is holding somewhat obscure conversations with his tricorder all evening long, chances are you wasted your cooking talents on the wrong guy.

"So, Mr Tricorder, would you like a dark pigmented fluid with additional lactosal fluid and saccharose in crystalline form?"

Right cook? Right guest? So let's get started!

First and most important: Get everything ready so you don't have to hunt all through the kitchen trying to find the tool you need and the vegetables that are up for steaming next. If you think you can do without a bit of preparation: fine. Just don't blame it on us if the doorbell rings and you're still standing in the kitchen sporting rollers and a cucumber mask while the soufflé shuffles all over the floor and the pommes dauphinois decide to take part in a charcoal-lookalike-contest. You've been warned.

Chopsticks, Pizza and clumsy  Vorta simply DON'T mix.

Woohoo, here we go!

Please note: I was too lazy to convert the measurement indications to European standards. If any of you got spare time and could give me a hand on this, I'd be most grateful. Oh yeah, and another thing: Ma Shea's Little Boy Blue's recipes sport things like "a little bit of this and a little bit of that". So just add what you think is suitable, or leave what you don't want. Cooking is an art in itselves, you need inspiration. And a whole lot of feeeeeeeeeeeeeeling ... woohoo!

Click on the pans for the recipes of Ma Shea's Little Boy Blue's Stuff'd Irish Potatoes Cheesy Enchiladas à la Ireland Green and beautiful! Veggy rice, the Irish way Creamy cheese cookies, Irish style Irish Toffee Ice Cream Pie ChopChopChocCake (not Irish? Oh boy ...)