Out

Back when I was Mrs. Someone
you said,  "I don't write about my lusts,"
over & over & over & over, as a command,
a mind-numbing mantra.
Oh, nooooo, so superior.
So I bound my thoughts & my pen &
my tongue & my hands for your pleasure
and spent my time bent over.
You know what I mean.
The only way to stop the daily
bludgeoning and subjugation
was to suck your meanness
out your cock, and that was temporary.
Estimated 500 blow jobs later,
you're still flapping your flap
about how deep your water runs
but I know for a fact
that the only spring in you
runs out between your legs.
As for my selfish, evil,
shit-brained desires,
I swallowed them for years,
put myself in a box, but no more.
Your new online groupies can have U,
can have the real thing--
would scare the Bejeezus out of
any one of them gullible enough,
like I was, to take you on in person,
or whatever variety of freak entity
U really R.
Now I am free to spit
& scream
& write
& here I go.

PamEhli/1998 

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