Perfection

Having prayed intently
in a sweat-soaked after-dream trip
for a sign...
In the meantime I had decided
to quit waiting in vain,
not seeing the billboards of gentle breeze
that always kept the hair off my face.

So I guess I'll stand in the tempest
and vice-grip whatever support I can find,
maybe dragging it with me.
I'd rather keep fighting,
even to the point of beating on myself
to submit to imprisonment
than to be caught standing, swaying,
forever under the Southern Cross,
mind full of the blue coal.

Not!
I could've been on the next plane out
for what I spent to
rid the world of another of me.

Time was suspended
then and there
in total freedom;
spontaneous, unguarded. Breathing.

She said perfection is boring. I disagree.
Then everything changes and
the little deaths are hard to deal with.
So we'll just leave it with no progression.
I was alive...
and I can't wait any longer.

PamEhli/1992


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Since 1-20-03