Q: How do you upgrade a Yugo car?
       A: Put in an engine.
        A. "TRADE IT FOR A TRABBIE"   (the late great Roosian "people's car")
        A. "PARK IT NEXT TO A PORTAJOHN.....AND LEAVE IT UNLOCKED"
        A. "CRUSH IT AND USE IT FOR TRACTION BALLAST IN YOUR BIG DOG 4X4 PICKEMUP TRUCK"
        Q: Why do Yugos have heated rear windows?
        A: To keep your hands warm when you're pushing them.

        Q. What's the difference between a Yugo and the principal's office?
A. It's less embarrassing if your friends see you leaving the principal's
       office.

        Q: What goes on pages 4-5 of the Yugo user's manual?
        A: The train & bus schedule.

        A man goes to a parts garage:
        Man: "Can I have a windshield wiper for a Yugo please?"
        Parts man: "Yeah, that seems like a fair swap."

        Q: What is the sport-version of Yugo?
        A: The driver wears Nike shoes.

        Q: What do you call a Yugo at the top of a hill?
        A: A miracle.

        Q: What do you call two Yugos at the top of a hill?
        A: A mirage.

        Q: What do you call a Yugo with dual exhausts?
        A: A wheelbarrow

        Q: How do you double the value of a Yugo?
        A: Half fill it with gasoline!

        Q: How do you make a Yugo look good?
        A: Park it between two Cadillacs!

        Q: What to you call a Yugo with brakes?
        A: Customized.

        Q: What do you have to do if your Yugo gets in the way of a swarm of killer
        bees?
        A: Stop pushing and take refuge into the car.

        Q: What is the Yugo owner's most ardent wish?
        A: To buy a car.

        Q: What do you call a Yugo with a seat belt?
        A: A rucksack.

        Q: How do you make a Yugo go faster uphill?
        A: Throw out the passenger.

        Q: How do you make a Yugo go faster downhill?
        A: Turn off the engine.

        Q: What do you call a Yugo with a flat tire?
        A: A write off.

        STOP THE PRESS!!
        Yugo has announced a new 16 Valve model for 1993.
        8 in the engine, 8 in the radio.

        - I can see you've got a new car - a Yugo!
        - Yes, I won the second prize in a lottery.
        - What was the first prize then?
        - A fruit-basket!

        Yugo will be introducing three new vehicles next year.   They will have a moped called an "I Go". They will have a
         4-door called a "We Go". They will also have a new station wagon called the "Y'all Go".

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