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| version: purple star |
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| HOW COULD I DO THIS? Feel like I’m falling Before you even let go Grasping at nothing With my burdened soul My pain is deserved But may never match yours Even when your words Attack me like swords How could I do this? Cause you this pain? Over and over I do it again You cry out for help I can’t hear your screams I get lost and can’t tell Whether real or in dreams You are calling me Calling my name Trying to share Your innermost pain Asking and pleading Want some relief From the sorrow, the hurt I can see you have grief. I want to help Want to prove how I feel Come out in the open You don’t have to conceal Temporal visions Of your untimely death Leave me unsettled I want to confess It’s me, it’s my fault I put those thoughts there The evil that is me Made you not want to care I didn’t want to do it For your pain is my own Don’t want to hurt you But to sin I am prone Want to redeem myself To change how you feel I hope I can do it So you know my love’s real Alexis Souder November 1, 2001 |
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| Other poems from this year: Beautiful Goddess SELF INDULGENT NEUROSIS alone Lost and Trembling How Could I Do This? As One |