On The Bar's TV:
A Guide To Chicago's TV Newsbabes - January '98 Edition
What a pathetic loser I still am. Outside of my poor wife, who has put up with
me for 15 years now, the only adult females I share any regular amount
of time with (albeit only through a video screen) are local television
news anchors and reporters. Given those credentials, I feel fully
qualified to rate and rank
Chicago's TV Newsbabes!
10. Tracy Butler.
Breaking into the Top Ten for this edition of "CTVN" is Channel 7's Morning Weather person,
Tracy Butler. She might garner an even higher rating sometime, if she'd just lose the pants she
ALWAYS wears, and give us a nice dress or skirt sometime. She is much like my next-to-youngest
daughter, Megan, in being very photgenic, and in never wearing dresses.BULLETIN: Let it be known, that on February 16, 1998, Tracy Butler wore a skirt/jacket combo. She doesn't have "piano legs", like our beloved First Lady. She has very nice legs, not in Sylvia Perez's league, but very nice, indeed. UPDATE: Tracy wore a (longish) skirt on Feb 23, with dark stockings. Perhaps Ms Butler has heard our criticism, and reacted? She will be upgraded in our next edition! TRACY WATCH CONTINUES: On March 27th, coincidentally (or IS it?) my afore-mentioned daughter Megan's birthday, Tracy wore a Mini-skirt!
9. Linda Kollmeyer
Some snobs might complain that Ms. Kollmeyer doesn't belong here, not being a "newsperson", but
tough. It's my damn list, and she's smack dab in the middle of the Channel 9 news, when she does her
thing - which is to give us the winning lottery numbers. On top of that, The Lovely Linda is a full-fledged
registered nurse, so if someone were to faint during the "Illinois Instant Riches" game show, she could
perform CPR. And not only that (!), but her bio tells us she is a personal fitness trainer, as well as an actress in TV shows and commercials(you can see her in the current Mr. Clean ad). When I win Lotto,
one of my first acts will be to hire Linda as my personal trainer.
8. Sylvia Perez
A little (I'd guess about 5') cutie, with a great pair of legs.
7. Diann Burns
Easy on the eyes, a great personality. Just gave birth, but still in great
shape, anchoring the 10 O'Clock on Channel 7. And she's moved up a
notch to #7
6. Robin Meade
Taking over the now-departed Sylvia Gomez's #6 slot is Robin Meade. I didn't get to see much
of her before, when she was on the pre-"Today" time slot. But she's sporting a new look, hair-wise,
and appearred recently in prime-time, filling in during the holidays. My new awareness of her babeness got her on the list. A lesbian co-worker of mine raves about her. Take that for what you will, we both
appreciate good-looking women.
5. Linda Yu
The oldest one of the ten (past the half century mark, believe it or not!),
but she can still stir my stew. I love the way she over-pronounces some words,
particular the last word in a sentence, such as "on Channel 7 Eyewitness
News at Four", where the "four" becomes "fourrrrr".
4. Joanie Lum
I've seen Joanie in person. No, I'm not a stalker. This is probably the best
photograph of the group - most of the other women look better than their
photos. This is not a dig at Joanie - just a compliment to her photographer.
She looks AS GOOD in person as in the photo.
3. Cheryl Burton
I've seen Cheryl in person, too. No, I'm not a stalker. She has a . She is the best reader of the whole group, as well, with a steady,
perfect voice.
2. Nesita Kwan
She's our runner-up. Should our number one babe be unable to continue in her
role as "Ms Rob's Grille & Bar - January 1998", Ms Kwan will assume her title and
duties, as well as being comped @ The Bar. By the way, I'm being reptitive here,
but I have seen Nesita, up-close and personal. No, I'm not a stalker. What a lousy promo shot from the Channel 5
archives, though - they have to put that crummy background behind her. I also have to warn
Nesita that I don't like her new, shorter 'do, and might have to lower her standing if it stays.
And now, finally, my Numero Uno pick, Ms Rob's Grille & Bar 1998, is...
1. Allison Payne
She's got it all - beauty, body, always a great dresser (it sometimes appears
as if Allison just has a little Victoria's Secret lace thingy under those
jackets she favors), and a terrific laugh. It's a pity that Channel 9's
website just has this crappy picture of her - the one they use at the intro
to the show is much better. And this just into the newsroom! It was revealed that Allison's birthday is February 12th. Happy belated, Allison!
Now a word about runners-up. Channel 2 has no website, so no pictures of their
staff are included here. I'd make room for Linda MacLennan in an instant if I procure
a picture of her. Same thing for Sarah Lucero. And I'd include that Indian gal who does the "ITN
World News" on Channel 56, if I had a picture of her (even if I remembered her
name, and considering the show is from London). Oh, yeah, WGN, if you put a decent COLOR
picture of Dina Bair on-line, she'd get on here, too.
NEWS NEWS! A recent headline story on the local news was the story of a woman who defrauded the state welfare departments of $100,000 and bought a $200,000 suburban home with the money. Well, guess who lives right across the street? Yours truly.
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