I do not own Estefan’s song nor her so don’t ask me if I do because I don’t.

Thank you to all my reviewers!
FYI: The Rose is by Bette Midler, November rain is by guns and roses, and this song is by Gloria estefan
anything for you –Gloria estefan

Anything for you
Though you're not here

I messed up again. This morning I accidentally knocked him out of bed. He made love to me last night and he said he was sorry for what he did to me in the past.
My yami did not make that change.
I do not understand. Last night I had him in tears as he held me in his arms. He was so penitent last night. I accidentally knocked him out of bed and he lost it. He stood up and he dragged me out of bed to the floor.
“Where’s my dinner?”

Since you said we're through
It seems like years

Bakura left the house in the early morning to go to Marik’s home. I have no idea what they were going to do over there. I suddenly felt bad for Malik, being between both of the yamis. Poor Malik always was at the mercy of Marik’s desires. We at least had that in common. But Bakura turned to me before he left and told me that last night was a mistake.
Bakura had a change of heart quickly.

Time keeps draggin on and on
And forever's been and gone
Still I can't figure what went wrong

I sat down and wrote a letter to Bakura. I didn’t know where I would go or where I would live, but it was clear that my yami would never change. He never learned his lesson from last night. I thought for certain that he did.

I'd still do anything for you
I'll play your game

You say jump, Bakura, and I ask, “How high?” You want to keep beating me? Fine. I will play your little whore for you if it will make you happy. I will play the innocent victim when you cut off my air. Whatever you want to do to me doesn’t matter anymore. You learned nothing of love, Bakura. I thought we had resolved it. But we resolved nothing.

You hurt me through and through
But you can have your way

You always wished that I wasn’t here. You always wished that I was out of your life forever. Bakura, you can have your wish. You’ve done everything possible to hurt me and humiliate me. You wanted to break my spirit, my soul. Why not? You broke everything else in me. It doesn’t matter that you broke my arm because you couldn’t find the remote or that you broke my leg because I couldn’t run home fast enough. It doesn’t matter that you made love to me without my consent. It does matter that you broke my heart. No doctor can fix that, no medication can dull the pain.

I can pretend each time I see you
That I don't care and I don't need you
And though you'll never see me cryin'
You know inside I feel like dying

Well, I don’t need the pain anymore, Bakura. I’m tired of taking medication for pain. No more! I’ve wasted more tears on you than I can count. You will never love me, Bakura. Never! You beat me up and disguise it as love! One time you told me “I’m doing this because I love you, Ryou.” Since when does cutting my arm and throwing me down the steps count as love? Love isn’t like that.
I am not going to cry to Bakura anymore. I wish I didn’t cry anymore. There was so many ways to end the pain. But my father wouldn’t want me to kill myself to escape this “demon” as my father called him. He already stabbed me with the knife, he already choked me with his hands.

And I'd do anything for you
In spite of it all
I've learned so much from you
You made me strong

Those “lessons” you gave me helped me survive, yami. You might think you were breaking my spirit. No. You were toughening me up. No matter what you do to me, Bakura, I will love you. You can beat me, strangle me, tie me down, use my body as your own personal toy to do with as you please.
Love is dedication, yami. I may hate you for hurting me, but I would still do anything for you to make you happy.

But don't you ever think that I don't love you
That for one minute I forgot you
But sometimes things don't work out right
And you just have to say goodbye


I hope you find someone to please you
Someone who'll care and never leave you
But if that someone ever hurts you
You just might need a friend to turn to

You want me to leave you? I will. I will let you find a new body, a new hikari. I hope you find someone you like, someone who can take the kind of love you give. There’s no more I can take. There’s no more punishment my body can endure. Maybe there will be someone out there looking to be in our kind of relationship. What would the ad in the column look like? Probably something like:
“Wanted: SWM desiring abusive relationship. Will take anything you can give. Beatings every night preferred. Gentle lovemaking not a necessity…take me for all I’m worth as fast or as hard as you would like. I am submissive and never fight back no matter how much torture you make me endure. Please respond. The sooner I get a vicious beating to the point of unconsciousness, the better.”
But I swear, yami. If anyone ever hurts you, I hope you can tell me. I may hate you for hurting me, but I protect the people I love…even if they treat me like a common dog.

And I'd do anything for you
I'll give you up
If that's what I should do
To make you happy

But if leaving you will make you happy, I will do that. You always wished I was out of your life. Before I passed out on a number of occasions, you called me worthless and said that I should do the world a favor and leave it. Maybe you are right, yami.
If leaving you will make you happy, I will leave you. Then you could find someone else to love you.

I can pretend each time I see you
That I don't care and I don't need you
And though inside I feel like dying
You know you'll never see me crying


Don't you ever think that I don't love you
That for one minute I forgot you
But sometimes things don't work out right
And you just have to say goodbye

I did love him. Everything I did for him….didn’t matter. I messed it up. I was his “worthless bitch.” Who could live a life like the one Bakura offered me? Beatings, insults, forcing me to sleep with him against my will….who could live with that.
If I could talk to him one last time, I would say: Bakura, I do love you. I really do.
But I cannot forget what you have done to me. You took my innocence away, yami. That wasn’t yours to take, but mine to give. Nothing ever worked out well between us. It never will again. So, I have choice but to say goodbye to you. I will always think about you…until my dying breath. I will always love you until the end of my days. But I cannot live with you anymore. Goodbye, my love.

I read the letter over again and grabbed my bags and walked out the door as a cough and a sob broke through my throat.