To Be Forgotten
By Alison

Part 3

Karou looked up and frowned when Toshiya and Kyo walked into the studio, laughing about something. He sighed wistfully, wishing he could once again be the one to make Toshiya happy and laugh.

Anger slowly filled him as he thought about his present situation. Kyo for some reason had convinced the others that it would be better that Toshiya was not told about his and Kaoru's relationship. Kyo's reasoning was, "He doesn't even remember Kaoru at all, besides," he had said with a strange smile, "You two were so in love that you will probably get back together again anyway."

So he had said. But things weren't exactly going the way Kaoru had hoped. First off, Toshiya pretty much ignored him. He only spoke to Kaoru when he had a question, or when Kaoru was trying to talk to him, and then he would just smile, answer the question and turn away to talk to Kyo or Shinya. And then there was Kyo's strange behavior. He would always interrupt when Kaoru and Toshiya were talking, and was getting really possessive of the bassist.

At first Kaoru just wrote it off as Kyo trying to make sure that Toshiya was ok and wouldn't be hurt by anything. But now…he just wasn't sure any more. And this both angered and scared him.

Don't worry about it, Kaoru, he told himself, things will be back to normal soon. So it didn't make him feel totally better, but it helped. Putting a smile on his face he called out to the bassist. "Ohayo, Toshiya-san!"

Toshiya turned toward Kaoru and favored him with a small smile. "Ohayo Kaoru-kun," he replied softly before turning back to Kyo.

Kaoru felt his smile slowly slipping off his face, and another sigh of desire rise up in him. However his sigh turned to a shiver when he saw the smirk on Kyo's face.

*

"Hey Toshiya! Want to go get some drinks? I think we deserve some fun after a long practice!" Karou called over to the bassist as he was putting his guitar in its case.

Toshiya looked up from his bass, surprised by the offer. He stared contemplatingly at Kaoru before smiling shyly, his cheeks slightly reddening "Um…ok."

Kaoru smiled back in amazement, amazement at both the fact that Toshiya had actually agreed to go with him, and at the fact that Toshiya was actually shy and blushing at something as simple as going out for drinks. Much different from the old Toshiya, who flirted with everyone and was never shy about something like that. Much different from *his* Toshiya.

"What a good idea Kaoru! I'll come too!" Kyo exclaimed with an impish smile, before grabbing his coat and heading out the door towards the parking lot. Toshiya looked over his shoulder at Kaoru and shrugged before following Kyo. Kaoru sighed and followed after them. He had wanted it to be just him and Toshiya, but it looked like that wasn't going to happen.

Shinya wrapped his arms around Die when the door to the practice room clicked shut and Kaoru's footsteps faded away. "This is not going good at all."

"Eh? What do you mean? Kaoru and Toshiya are going out for some drinks? Isn't that what we wanted to happen?"

Shinya frowned. "You know that Kyo has had a crush on Toshiya ever since Toshiya joined the band, right?"

"Well yeah…but didn't he give that up when Toshiya and Kaoru got together?"

"Of course. But are they together now? No. So Kyo is using it as an opportunity to see if he can be the one to get with Toshiya. Die…haven't you noticed what has been going on for the last two weeks?" Shinya asked, annoyance obvious in his voice

Die scratched the back of his head while scrunching up his face in a thoughtful expression. "Well yeah…I think…I guess…I don't know."

Shinya sighed in mock annoyance Die's expression just too cute to stay angry at. "Die, Die, Die. What am I going to do with you?"

Die dropped his hand from his head to Shinya's waste, a sly smile slowly spreading across his face as he traced circles on Shinya's thigh through the fabric of his skirt. "Oh I could think of a few things, Shin-chan…"

"Hentai!" Shinya shrieked, attempting to pull away.

Die merely laughed and tightened his grip on Shinya. "So I am!" With that he picked Shinya up and headed towards his car, pausing only to kick the studio door shut, with Shinya yelling at hitting Die all the way; the growing problems of the band all forgotten that night.

*

Toshiya giggled again at nothing in particular as he reached for the bottle of sake, which he had clearly already had enough of. Out of the three of them, Toshiya was the most drunk, followed by Kyo, and finally Kaoru, who had decided not to drink so much as he would probably end up having to drive the other two home.

"Ne, Toshiya-chan, don't you think you have had enough?" Kaoru asked, a slight smile on his face as he watched the bassist blink lazily at the cup in his hand.

"Nooooo, of course I *hic*" another giggle" haven't had enough. Look how much is still left in the bottle!" And to prove his point, Toshiya took the bottle, turned it upside down and poured out the contents into his cup. His cup happened to be too small to hold the remainder of the sake and it spilled over onto the table.

"Oops!" Toshiya giggled, as he dipped his fingers into the puddle and then brought them to his lips, slowly licking them clean. He totally missed the other to men staring at him with lust in their eyes.

Kaoru shook his head to purge it of the less than clean thoughts that were currently going through it and stood up, "I'm going to the bathroom, and then we will leave, okay?" Kyo nodded, his eyes never leaving Toshiya. Kaoru shrugged and disappeared into the crowd.

Kyo's eye's flicked away from Toshiya for a minute to focus on Kaoru's disappearing figure. A smile edging onto his face. His gaze returned to Toshiya and he slid a little closer to the drunken man.

"To-shi-ya-chan, you are so pretty, ne?" He chirped as he took the bassist's face in his small hand. "Pretty pretty pretty. It makes me crazy!"

Toshiya giggled, and a blush crept onto his face. "Thank you Kyo-chan!"

Kyo chuckled and pulled Toshiya's face closer to his until there was only a small space in-between them. He could feel Toshiya breath on his cheek, and he let out a low moan before quickly closing the gap. Kyo was pleasantly surprised when Toshiya didn't pull away, and even more surprised when he felt Toshiya's tongue brush against Kyo's closed lips. Just as Kyo was going to open his moth to allow Toshiya's tongue entrance, the other man pulled away.

Toshiya blinked and smiled sleepily, "That was nice Kyo-chan." Before Kyo could even reply, Toshiya had fallen asleep.

Kyo's smile was one of satisfaction and victory as he readjusted himself so Toshiya could use his lap for a pillow, and was still smiling when Kaoru returned.

"What are you so happy about?" Kaoru snapped, seeing Toshiya all curled up next to (Alison: And on! Oh no! ^^;) the grinning vocalist. Kyo didn't reply, his smile simply grew.

Kaoru shivered at the sight. Warning bells were going off in his head, telling him something was wrong. But he ignored them, brushed them off as an effect of the alcohol. Kaoru sighed and picked up the sleeping bassist as carried him out of the bar and to the car, with Kyo practically skipping along behind them.

"Thanks for the ride, Kaoru!" Kyo said when Kaoru came out of Toshiya's bedroom, where he had carried the sleeping man and managed to tuck him in, more or less.

"Yeah…sure, no problem," Kaoru managed to mutter as he was rudely shoved out of the door.

"See ya tomorrow!" Kyo exclaimed before shutting the door. Kaoru stood in the hallway for a bit, just staring at the door. The events of the last few weeks had him very confused. Sighing, he shoved his hand into his pockets and headed home, alone, where he would once again not have Toshiya to hold and kiss. And where he would not wake up the beautiful man besides him the next morning, and would go to practice alone and go home alone…and…Kaoru sighed again. After once having Toshiya, life without him just didn't seem worthwhile.

Kyo, on the other hand, was bubbling with happiness as he slid into his bed. Things were working out better than he had thought. And being alone in bed really didn't bother him that much, because he was sure that in due time he wouldn't be alone at all. After all, Toshiya didn't remember his past relationship with the guitarist, and he didn't to seem to be interested in him now, and he hadn't even pulled away when Kyo had kissed him! Yes, things were going great for Kyo.

*

// Kaoru quickly diverted his eyes from Toshiya's form and blushed when the other man looked up from his bass. Kaoru silently chided himself for being caught staring at the bassist again, but it wasn't really his fault! He just found Toshiya too wonderful *not* to stare at him! Of course, he would never admit that to anyone, because, knowing *his* band members, one of them would tell Toshiya what he said. And then of course Toshiya would be too disgusted with him to even want to be friends. No, he couldn't risk it.

Kaoru, however could help but let out a soft sigh of longing. He could help but wonder what it would be like to be able to hold and kiss Toshiya, to openly tell the other how much he cared and to be able to make love to the younger man.

Kaoru blushed again and steered away from those dangerous thoughts. They won't make anything better, so you will be better off not thinking them at all, he reasoned with himself.

And so it continued. Everyday Kaoru would watch the bassist when he thought no one was looking. It wasn't long, however, until Toshiya began to notice Kaoru's interest in him.

Toshiya smiled to himself when he noticed Kaoru out of the corner of his eye. He didn't know exactly why Kaoru was always watching him, but he could give it a good guess…Actually, he didn't even really need to guess. All the others guys in the clubs Toshiya went to gave him the same look. But he wanted more than just that with Kaoru.

One day after practice Toshiya crept up behind Kaoru and wrapped his long arms around the guitarist's middle in a seemingly friendly way.

"Kao-chan," He purred into Kaoru's ear, "Want to get some drinks? I don't want to go home…to lonely."

Kaoru blinked and turned to face the other man, a smile spreading across his face, not only because of the invitation, but also because of the closeness of the bassist. "Sure thing, Totchi!"

Toshiya smiled removed his arms from there position around the other man and headed in the direction of his bass, but walking backwards so he could still be facing Kaoru. "Ok, then. But I got a ride with Kyo this morning, so you will have to drive. Will my bass fit in your car?"

Kaoru nodded eagerly. Toshiya's smile grew. "I will be waiting outside then!"

Kaoru watched after him for a minute, not believing his luck, before pouncing on his guitar and hastily shoving it in its case. After a few curses he finally managed to shove it in and practically ran to catch up with Toshiya.

Shinya rolled his eyes, Kaoru tried so hard to hide his feeling about Toshiya, but it was just too obvious that he had a thing for the bassist. Shinya's soft laugh melted into a sigh of pleasure when he felt someone's arm's go around his waist this time.

"So you think they will finally get together?" Die mumbled into Shinya's hair before actually kissing the top of the drummer's head.

Shinya smiled and melted into Die's embrace. "Let's hope so. I don't know how much longer I can take of them dancing around each other. Duh, love must have made them really blind to take them this long to actually make an effort to get together."

Shinya twisted around in Die's hold and lightly pressed his lips to the older man's. Both of them totally missed the look of loss and sadness that settled on Kyo's face.

"Bye guys," Kyo called out the oblivious couple, not really expecting an answer.

So this was really it, was it? Kyo thought climbed into his car. He had finally lost his chance with the bassist. He let his forehead rest on the top of the steering wheel. He couldn't stop the two tears that squeezed out of his eyes and slid down his face.

Try as he might, Toshiya could not hold it in any longer and he burst out laughing. Kaoru, who was sitting across from him in the circular booth, was immensely pleased to see that Toshiya had found his joke so funny.

Kaoru pored himself another glass of sake while he waited for Toshiya's laughter to die down. He was surprised, though, when all traces of the playfulness that had been there a second ago disappeared. His narrowed his eyes slightly in confusion at Toshiya's sudden seriousness.

Toshiya took a deep breath and slid around in the booth until he was sitting next to Kaoru. "Kaoru," He began, "I was supposed to be drunk by now, but I guess things didn't go exactly as I have planned. It will be harder now, but I just can't keep it a secret any longer."

Kaoru's eyes widened. What was Toshiya trying to say?

"Kaoru…" Toshiya hesitated. Kaoru saw this and took the younger man's hand in his own, giving it a squeeze of encouragement. It worked because Toshiya took a deep breath and continued on.

"Kaoru. I have liked you for a long time, and I don't just mean like…but *like* like. And I was wondering…well…I see you looking at me and watching me a lot, so I was just wondering if maybe you might…"

Toshiya didn't get a chance to finish, for his lips were instantly covered by Kaoru's. Kaoru smiled when the both pulled apart, slightly breathless.

"So do I Toshiya…So do I…"

Toshiya's eyes filled with happy tears as he threw himself into Kaoru's arms. They stayed like that for a few minutes, just enjoying the feel other the other so close. But eventually they decided that they should go. Despite their reluctance to let go at that point, they both knew of the wonderful things that would take place later that evening between them. //

// Kaoru was surprised to find Toshiya missing when he woke up. Usually Kaoru had to literally drag Toshiya out of bed. The more Kaoru thought about it, though, he realized that he wasn't really that surprised at all. The last few days the bassist had been spending more and more time out with friends that Kaoru didn't know.

Kaoru would be lying if he said he wasn't jealous. He knew that Toshiya could do what ever he wanted, so that his getting angry was stupid, but Kaoru couldn't help it. He was angry. Not angry enough to actually say anything, but angry enough to be cold to the other man, and angry enough to roll away when Toshiya went to put his arms around Kaoru the night before.

"Toshiya?" He called out? No answer came. Sighing, Kaoru dragged himself out of the bed and to the kitchen. A note stuck to the fridge caught his eye. When he finished reading it, Kaoru crumpled it up and threw it in the trash, anger flaring up inside of him.

Dear Kao-chan, it began, I am out to breakfast with a friend. Don't worry, I will be back in time for practice. Love, Toshiya.

Out to breakfast with a friend. Kaoru should have known. Toshiya was always out with someone these days.

When Toshiya returned two hours later, Kaoru was waiting for him. Toshiya was surprised at the anger in Kaoru eyes as he watched Toshiya slip out of his shoes and coat.

"So where didn't you get off to, Toshiya-san?" Kaoru asked, his voice like ice, fully knowing where the other man had been.

"Out to breakfast with a friend. Didn't you get my note?" Toshiya trailed off when he noticed that Kaoru had narrowed his eyes. "Kaoru…? What's is wrong?"

Kaoru stood up and started at Toshiya, his body almost shaking in a jealous rage. "What is wrong, Toshiya-san? What is wrong? Nothing is wrong. See if I care of you flirt with half of Japan's population! I really couldn't care anymore!" With that, he turned and stalked into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.

Toshiya just started after him in shock. When it finally sunk in what just happened, he kicked the table closest to him, got his bass from their room and stormed out the apartment, slamming the door behind him, just like Kaoru had done earlier.

Kaoru frowned and leaned up against the bathroom door when he heard Toshiya leave. He regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth. But it was too late to take them back now. If only he knew what they would do… //

*

Toshiya's giggle melted into a sigh when Kyo kissed him again. He tangled his hands up in Kyo's hair and giggled again before leaning in to give Kyo a quick kiss on the nose and than pulled away, making to get up off the couch, which they were currently sitting on in the practice room.

"Toshiya…" Kyo growled, and pulled the younger man's head to his, smashing their lips together. Toshiya moaned and opened his mouth, which Kyo immediately slipped his tongue into. Toshiya's eyes fluttered shut as Kyo rubbed his tongue against his.

*

Kaoru yawned as he walked down the hallway of the studio towards the practice room. His guitar case was practically dragging on the ground. Sleep had decided to be cruel the last night, and he had lain awake almost all night, just staring at the ceiling, thinking about the past, and wondering about his future.

Kaoru reached for the door handle of the practice room, but froze when he heard a moan from within. That…sounded like Toshiya! Kaoru's eyes opened wide in surprised and wondered what was going on on the other side of the door.

Upon opening the door, Kaoru's jaw dropped in shock at what he saw.

*

Toshiya moaned against Kyo's mouth again, neither of them hearing the door open and Kaoru enter the room. Both smiling, they pulled apart slightly to breath.

Toshiya cried out when suddenly a hand grabbed Kyo's collar and yanked him up. Kyo whipped around to see Kaoru, whose eyes were filled with rage and his teeth clenched.

Kyo's surprise quickly wore off and he smirked. "Ohayo Kaoru," Kyo drawled, "Toshiya and I must have not heard you come in…we were kind of preoccupied, you know."

In a blink of an eye, Kaoru had balled up his fist and punched Kyo right in the face. The blow had come so quickly, Kyo hadn't even had any time to react.

"Kyo!" Toshiya shrieked and reached for the smaller man to protect him from any more strikes that might have come. But Kaoru was already out the door.

...to be continued...

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