Deepest Bear at the BIOS Freedive Open Classic
Party Time after release - hello to my new and old friends
Lots of love, the deepest bear in the world
Grrrr..... I am soooo tired after my adventures at the BIOS Freedive Open Classic in Limassol. It was an eventful week beginning with some quiet pool and line training with my PA, the recruitment of newest Team Deepest Bear member Haydn Welch, practising dynamic with my new Guidone monofin and lying in the sun watching all the freedivers hard at work. However a few days into the competition, everything went slightly wrong. I was spending a nice morning in bed with my new girlfriend the bunny and I was rudely awakened by a young man with a gun. Bear Nap!
My PA returned to find a ransom note but no real instructions. Luckily I am as brave and fierce as a honey badger and was able to survive the ordeal. My strange growling noises soon persuaded my captors to remove the paper bag from my head and at this point I worked out I was in the hands of the scuba safety team.
Now, unlike Deepest Bears, humans undergo a strange condition known as narcosis once they go deep into the blue sea. I figured that if I could persuade them to take me down deep, they would start acting silly and I could make my escape. I was correct!! After listening in on their dive briefing, I soon worked out that the guy I needed to ride along with was Special Agent Mike. All the way from the U S of A, Mike was destined to hang around at 103m waiting for Martin, Carlos and Herbert. All I had to do was climb into his pocket. As Mike got his rebreather hooked up, I breathed up quietly and prepared for the trip. We dropped pretty fast down to 103m and it was time to show my face.
When I lifted the flap of Mike's BCD pocket I could see the ROV and the bottom plate. I blew some bubbles so Mike noticed me and the depth had its required effect. Mike was up for some silliness!! Before he realised what he was doing, he had removed me from his pocket and let me swim around in front of the camera. I even made some noises for a good effect. Then I saw Carlos coming down and my Guidone monofin did the rest of the work for me. When Mike was watching Carlos, I made my escape and finned hastily to the surface.
In the excitement of Carlos' dive, unfortunately no one noticed me surface alongside him. The barge was too far from the water for me to climb out and before I knew it... horror of horrors... I was back in the hands of my captors. The scuba team, not understanding my breath hold powers, then made me spend a load of time on the deco station before taking me back to the hotel in a blacked out van. I was going to need some help to escape.
That evening the ransom demand was finally made. My PA managed to collect enough beer money that the scuba divers got so drunk they decided to release me. Before they could hand me over calmly, I made a bold leap, calling once again on that courage of the honey badger.... all the way from the top floor of the Golden Arches and down into the pool. At first I landed on the concrete but luckily Heimo the medic was at hand. A quick resuscitation and it was time for a swim.
Deepest Bear and Heimo the Medic
By later that evening I was back in the hands of my PA and enjoying a beer while everyone watched me swimming around at 103m.
You can understand, that with all that excitement, there was no chance of a good static apnea record so that will have to wait. In the meantime.. here are some pictures. Thanks to everyone who got to know me, and to everyone who gave money towards my beer/bear ransom.
DB xx
Team DB
Howard and friends
Lisa
Lars
Marcus
On the plane
Keiko
Karaoke Kaz
Daniel
Zoe
Monkey Chris
Greg and Guidone
Dave Harries
No Sambas here
Young Mr Jones
Tess
the boys
Bear Beer
Dynamic Johanna
Roses
The Lads
Flying!
Japan Team
Kaz
Scubies
Miss Lisa G
saltfree
Martin and Emma 
Matt and Dave
Rodin
Wonkey Dave
If you have a nice photo of me please email it through the link below and we will put it up. I am now putting together my summer diary so if you would like me to join you for some cool diving then please get in touch. Have honey will travel! see you soon DB XX
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