"Falling"

I am falling...
I can't hold on anymore...
I asked for your help...
But you denied me...

You want me dead...
God wants me dead...
He is pulling on me...
I can not control it...

Why?
I've been denied of beauty...
I survived my abortion...
I was outcast from the society...
I was your ugly duckling...

You hate me...
You taunt me...
You curse me...
You wish me dead...

I have fought you...
Refused you...
But I am not strong enough anymore...
And as i draw the razor from my pocket...
I claim your victory...

Goodbye.
You have beet me.
I am dead.*


"The Bearing of Scars"

My heart hoffors hatred and tears
and the mirror horrors no confort.
The tears from my brow mark my arms for the razor.
My thoughts fource my tears
and my memories drive my fingers.
My tender skin tears and the blood burns the ground on which I stand.
The cross on my back fources me to my knees
as I take my hatred out on my skin.
Outside, I'm smiling
but inside I'm crying, screaming.
The world hoffors no salvation as I cut my life away.
I demand myself to have the courage to go deeper.
Deeper into my skin...
and deeper into my death.*


"The Horrid Truth"

The road is black. Black as night and
black as fate.
The sky as red.
Red as my blood and
as far away as salvation.
My heart is bruised.
Bruised with hate
And torn my tears.
My eyes are empty.
Empty as faith
and deep as fear.
My promises are scarred.
Scarred with the knowledge of a
future with no hope.

Take my hand, little children.
We have no future.
Mommy's dead and God is no more.
Awake from your sleep of smiles and hope.
Slit your father's throat
Shed your brother's blood
Because you know that it's your own.

Our world has turn to shit.
The screams of the babies are numbered
Kill yourselves now.
Your faith will not save you.
This is reality.

Reality is hell.
BURN with me!
BURN through me!
Come on, child...
BURN with me!
BURN through me!
Burn you heart with the stone mass of one fact:
Our future is s**t!
BURN with me!
BURN through me!
We were born to die without faith*


"The Wrath of Pain"

Bite me as I confront my reflection.
Gut me as I watch my love be burried into the ground.
Hate me as I'm outcast from my fellow people.
Poison me as I endulge my fate at the table.
Haunt me in my state of daze
and slit me when my courage fails.

The wrath of pain sleeps with me
and is there when I wake up.
It's the tears from my eyes and
the blood from my wrist.
It's the dreams from my mind and
the reality of my awakening.
It's the animosity from my heart and
the screams from my soul.
It's the cross on my back and
the rope around my neck.

The wrath of pain is when your children die
and when the see their first ray of light.
It's there when Mommy's not
and tucks you in at night.
It's there when you kill your infants
and when your infants kill you.
It's there when you earn your living
and it's the pay that you recieve.
It's there when you shed innocent blood and
when you give up yours.
It's there when your god is dead...
and when YOU'RE sentenced to hell.

When there's sun
When there's rain
We're always victims to
THE WRATH OF PAIN!*


"Forbidden Fruit Anthem"

Dear God, your people are here
burning on your vapid promises.
Your children are crying;
They endulged your s**t in the womb.

Dear God, we were born into ignorance.
You knew we'd rise above you.
The apple of Eden saved us and
we agknowledged your lies.

Dear God, we HAVE risen above you
and we've nearly destroyed your phony world and
killed all of it's people.
The apple of Eden still resides
in our pretty pink tummies.

If Christ was the savior,
who would he save?
The god of hollow promises
or the apple of Eden's knowledge?*


"The Only Blessing" To: My grandmother Gladys

Your smile has always dried my tears.
Your voice has always soothed my fears.
Your touch has always eased my tention.
Your arms have always been my security.

Since my first day, you built
your life around me, as I did
to you.
You were my mother in my arms.
What have I done to deserve your love?

You were my eyes in the dark.
You were my legs when I crippled.
You were the only light in my cave
of shadows.
You were my backbone when I
nearly fell.
You were my reason to awake each day.

But the galss shattered on that
da of despair when I learned you'd
tremble all the last days of your life.
It shattered when I learned you'd suffer
from here on.
It shatterted the same time as your smile

So, is this realy the end?
The end of smiles and hugs?
Of love and security?
Will I ever touch your hands again
that were nothing but good to me?
Is this the end of my only light?
Is this realy the end?

I watched your body put in the ground.
I stayed till dusk and covered you
with one of your beloved quilts
because I remember how you hated those
cold, windy nights which now give me
your missing confort.
It then dawned on me that it was
realy the end of every smile you
had brought to me.
It dawned that I realy would never
see your smiling face, or feel
your hugs.
This is the end of my completion.

I screamed into the wind...
I WANT YOU BACK!
COME BACK TO ME!
Please come back...
My dear grandmother...
I hope that you know...
I hope I showed you...
that I'll love you forever.
Thanks for being my only blessing.*
I love you.


"Burning Through God"

I'm a face marked with sin.
And I'm a rebel for Soloman's creed.
I am scarred with your lies
and I killed your redemption.
A curese to the hands of your believers.

I've stolen your off-spring.
Turned them into magots of betrayal.
You can not stop us for
We're your fears from within
and your screams in the air.

Well, we've risen above you.
And now we will kill you.
We're no long victims of
your Christian society.
We're your Satan from within.
You hate us but
we love your pain
Because now you're a dying god.

Hush, now children. Calm your screams.
You're parents are gone.
And God is dead.
There may be hope
for the future yet to come.*