PLAYERS: Mr Steve Lancelot Knight,Defender of the weak.
Mr Idris Dangote Our Lad.Steve kids the lad a bit about his Welsh sounding name.I wonder if he is in fact Idris the Dragon?. Anyway, Enjoy.
Subject: Humanitarian Assistance
Dear Friend, (Who Me???).
With due respect and humility , I write you this letter with the belief that you would be very much obliged to assist us.
Since we have no place or person to turn to for assistance, I feel it is very necessary to bring to your notice, the problem we are going through now, I am very optimistic that
you owe a moral obligation to look into our plight and come to our rescue, thus my writing to you.
I'm the son of the late Dr.Konte Dangote of the blessed memory. Prior to my father's assassination by the Rebel forces loyal to Major John Paul Koromah, he was the Director General, National Gold and Diamond Mining Corporation in Sierra Leone.
Yep and follows the usual Bla bla,So I wont bore you Ok.....................................
Not reading his mail properly I assume he is a she,but he dont seem to notice?
Subject: Re: Humanitarian Assistance
Hi Idris,
I read you mail very much today.
Yes I will help you my sister.
Whats cooking?
Steve. Lets keep it simple on this one
Subject: Do Comply!!!
Dear Mr.Steve,
Thanks for your quick response to my mail.
Please i want you to send to me your full contacts details via phone and fax numbers so that i will forward it to my lawyer who will brief you on all the modalities involved in carrying out this transaction successfully.
Hoping on your quick action and response to proceed.
Best Regards,
Idris
Well the mention of that old Lad word 'Modalities'. Lets find out his version of what it is?.
Subject: RE Do Comply!!!
Hi Idris,
I have your mail today,thank you.
My Details are:
Mr Steve Lancelot Knight
Arthur Meadow
London
Phone/Fax +44 709XXXXXXX
By the way,what the hell is a 'modalities ',?????
Reply Soonest
Mr Steve Lancelot Knight.
........................................................................................................................................
Subject: URGENT REPLY
Dear Mr.Steve Lancelot,
Thanks for your reply and also for your contact details.
What i mearnt by the modalities is by the lawyer telling you all that is involved to carry out this transaction successfully.(Oh So Thats It,I`ll Make a Note of That).
I have forwarded your contact to the lawyer as my beneficiary/ partner so i want you to contact him and tell him that you are my late father's friend in london who wants
to assist us retrive our consignment from the security company where it is been deposited in Amsterdam, Holland.
Please Mr.Lancelot, Like i told you in my first mail that we will give you 20% of the total money for helping us and also 5% of the total money will be mapped out for any
expences which you may incurre durring the transaction like the demurrage the box have incurred and your telephone bills and others.
Please contact the lawyer as soon as possible so that he can start preparing the documents and also to make a change of ownership to your name and an authorization letter which
will show that we have empowered you to retrive the fund on our behalf.
The name of the lawyer is Barrister Valentine Dale and his telephone number is (00229)90-98-72 please do contact him and introduce yourself to him the way i told you.
Please keep me informed on the outcome of your discussion with the lawyer.
My anticipated thanks as i await your soonest response.
Best Regards,
Idris
.....................................................................................................................................
Subject: Re : URGENT REPLY
My Dearest Idris,
May I say how my heart warmed like fire on you pleasent reply today.(Must be wind).
I telephone the Lawyer as soon as I read your mail.
I take it he does not work the weekends like I do?
Please confirm his number please as it seemed unable to connect or due to the network there.(00229)90-98-72 this is the number? I just dailed.Please confirm.
If I do hear from him I will contact you as soon as.
May I ask if your Family are from Wales in England?
I remember a family story where my Great Great Great Grand Father,who
was King Arthur Uther Pendragon having dealings with a Idris who lived near a cave area near Snowdonia.
So I will try the number again and wait for his contact.
Regards
Mr Steve Lancelot Knight
PS,I would like you please to use my full correct name in all future
contacts,I am proud of my name.Thank You.
Lets see if this makes him use my Full Name, and is the Lad really Welsh afterall?????
Subject: URGENT REPLY
My Dear Steve Lancelot Knight, (It worked,I should do this more often).
Thanks a million times for you quick response to my mail.
This is the lawyers direct number once again (00229)90-98-72.
Though he doesn't work on weekends but i still want you to contact him and finalise arrangements with him so that by monday he will go to the high court to legalise the
agreement that will bind us together in this transaction and as well begin the process of preparing the other documents we require to execute this transaction successfully to your favour.
My family is not from wales but rather Sierra leaone but i had it as a story when i was a little boy that my fore fathers settled much in Wales and London where they sold most of the gold and diamond they got from the minning. (Well its close ha ha ha )...
company in my country.
Please do get back to me on the outcome of your discussion with him as soon as you contact
him.
My anticipated thanks as i await to hear from you.
Best Regards,
Idris
OK will do my old son...............................................................................................
Subject: Re : URGENT REPLY
My Dear Idris.
Thank you for your mail.
I did wonder if your family was in Wales because of the name,its a small world ,as they say.
Anyway, I tried the phone number again and could not make contact.
I will try again when I get to my office on Tuesday,as there is a Bank Holiday here on Monday and the office is closed.
I will be jousting on Monday with my friend Art Pendragon,but he will
of course lose once again I assure you my lady of that and I will win
the prize.
I will send you word when I make contact with him.
Best Regards
Steve Lancelot Knight
So I will await contact from the Fake Lawyer.............................................................
Subject: Quick Actions!!!
My dear Steve Lancelot Knight,
Compliments and greeting.I hope you had a nice weekend.
It still beats my imagination why you find it dificult
contacting the lawyer,all the same,let's hope you get
through to him tomorrow as you said.
Be informed that everything we have to do in this
transaction lies on your contact to him because he is the
person that has all the documents backing up the deposit of
the funds in his custody.He has to prepare the agreement
that will bind us together and as well issue you an
authorisation letter before you can proceed to retrieve the
funds on our behalf.
Are you a banker? if no please let me know your proffesion.
I wish you luck in your jousting today.
Hoping on your quick actions and response.
Best Regards,
Idris
Subject: RE: Quick Actions!!!
Dear Idris,
Thanks for your mail yesterday.
I must say it is silly asking me about calling the lawyer when i have
tried now 6 times??? Maybe your question should be directed at your
lawyer??? Not Me.?
As for you question, I am Assistant Manager of a large International
Insurance Company,I agree to the payment of cash claims by our Shrimp
Boat Insurance Section,also 2 other sections.
What may I ask do you do Sir?.
Get the Lawyer to Fax or Email me,he seems to have a problem or fear
of telephones.
I thought this would be a quick transaction but your Lawyer seems like
a slow snail type thing to me.
Regards
Steve Lancelot Knight
Alright,so Idris spells out the deal....try and stay awake zzzzzzzzzzzzz..........................
Dear Mr.Steve Lancelot Knight,
Thanks for your mail.The contents were well noted.
Be informed that as far as this transaction is concerned that the lawyer has no reason to contact you.You are to contact him and introduce yourself as my late father's
foreign partner who will assist us retrieve our funds deposited in Amsterdam/Holland,that you want him to prepare and legalise the agreement that will bind us together in this transaction and as well issue you a power of attorney/authorisation letter to retrieve this fund on our behalf.(Idris wins the Watt long sentence award).
In as much as you have agreed to assist us as well as benefit yourself in this transaction,this is the procedure to follow to enable us achieve our goal.No more, no less.
I want you to contact him tomorrow for us to proceed in this transaction,whereby you know you are not capable and competent enough to handle this transaction,i advice you
back out now to enable us know the next step to take to achieve our objectives.
All i assure you is that you wouldn't have any cause to regret involving yourself in this transaction.
This is the lawyer's contact details once again:
Name: Barrister Valentine Dale
Phone number: (00229)90-98-72
e-mail add.: alfachambers@lawyers.com
Keep me posted on the outcome of your discussion with him.
Hoping on your understanding and quick actions.
Best Regards,
Idris Dangote
A barrister called,'Valentine Dale', ha ha, I thought he may have added,'Winton' To that. I`m sorry I will contain myself a bit more...<not>...............................NEXT!!
Subject: Re: Idris Dangote
-Dear Sir/Sirs,
Behold good Sir,For I am Mr.Steve Lancelot Knight.(There's an introduction woo woo).
I wish to have your attention and notice in your court hence.
I communicate with ye to notify my wish of as Mr Dangote's
foreign partner who wishes to retrieve his funds
deposited in Amsterdam/Holland,and I want you good Sir to prepare
and legalise the agreement that will bind us together in
this transaction and as well issue me a power of
attorney/authorisation letter to retrieve this fund henceforth.
My Contact details are:
Mr Steve Lancelot Knight
Arthur Meadow
London They have got to twig me now ????????????
Subject: I have contacted the Lawyer
Dearest Idris,
Please take note that on this fine day I have spoken the
words to our Lawyer and await his prompt reply hence.
After communication we will continue our quest for the holy grail and
go forward with the Lord at our side.
Regards
Mr Steve Lancelot Knight
Do they not watch Monty Python??? Guess they dont...............................................................
Subject: Please do understand????
My dear Steve Lancelot Knight,
I appreciate all you tireless efforts to contact the lawyer,though all efforts to reach him has proved futile so far,all inconvinence which it might have caused you is higly
regreted.
You can agree with me that nothing good come so easy,from the way things are moving so far,i'm well convinced that all will work out well for both of us in this transaction.
My dear,i appeal to you to try his line again,this time around you will get to him by the grace of God.
I'm surprised that the mail you sent to him returned back to you undelivered but that was the e-mail address he gave to me.All the same i will be going to his office now to let him know after sending this mail to you.
How can i play with you?,when i have seen from all indications that you are God sent to help us out of this stringent conditions we are passing through here in the
refugee camp.(Go on hit them heart strings baby one more time)..
My dear,please keep on trying his line for communication
network in this part of the world is atimes distorted.Please
try all you can to reach him on phone immediately you
receive this mail.
Hoping on your understanding and quick actions to proceed.
My anticipated thanks as i await your soonest response.
Best Regards,
Idris
Subject: I try to understand Sir
Dear Idris,
Thank you for your mail today.
I have read it but I am off to a meeting in 10mins.
Please get the Lawyer to mail me,at this address ONLY,so we can
conclude.
I dont have the time now to waste trying his contact again today.
I will be back in my office at around 3:30pm.
Thank You Sir.
Mr Steve Lancelot Knight.
My Dear Steve Lancelot Knight,
Thanks for your mail.The contents are well understood.
But like i told you,the only way we can proceed and make
progress in this transaction is for you to introduce
yourself to my lawyer and let him know that you are my late
father's partner who will assist us retrieve the funds
deposited for us in Amsterdam/Holland .
Then and only then will he advice and assist us to retrieve
this fund.
Put yourself in his shoes,how can he contact you and on what grounds?.
If you are serious to proceed in this transaction,plz do
contact him as soon as you return to office today so that we
can conclude this transaction in a couple of few days from
now so that we can come to meet you in your country for
subsequent disbursement according to the stipulated
percentage and to initiate our investment plans.
Note that he is the legitimate person to take care of all
the documentations that we need to carry out this
transaction successfully.I assure you that all procedures
involved in this transaction will be undertaken on a legal
ground that will leave both of us out of the breach of the
law.
The ball is on your court.
Hope to hear from you soonest.
Best Regards,
Idris
So our valient Knight trys again but the mail to the Lawyer bounces back AGAIN?....................
Subject: Do contact the lawyer...................Call him urgently
-My dear Steve Lancelot Knight,
Thanks for your mail.
Just like you said,i agree with you.If it is not God's will
for both of us to be partners for our mutual benefits,lets
this transaction not hold but if God permits nothing will
stop it from holding.
Now, i have to let you know that i'm a constructive minded
individual with high degree task to all my endeavours.Please
if you are not capable and well disposed to handle this
transaction,please and please again quit now at this early
stage because it will not condone frivolities and laxiety as
we proceed.
I spoke with the lawyer after going through your mail and he
told me he has been receiving foriegn calls,even he had a
call from your country today.How come you find it difficult
getting to him?
Mr.Steve,i advice you call the lawyer first thing tomorrow
morning so that we can commence this transaction if you are
serious to proceed in this transaction.
Once again, i re-confirm his contact details ;
Barrister Valentine Dale
Phone number:(00229)90-98-72
e-mail add.; alfachambers@lawyers.com
Could you please don't bother to contact me if you are not
ready to go according to procedures in this transaction.
Hoping on your understanding.
Get back to me asap on the outcome of your discussion with
him.
Best Regards,
Idris
Now Idris is getting a bit pissed I think?..So...........................................................................
I wish for you to help Mr Idris and myself in our new
business.
Regards
Steven Lancelot Knight.
...........................................................................................................................................
From Idris
Subject: Lawyer e-mail address
My dear Steve Lancelot Knight,
Sorry, i made a mistake in the lawyer's e-mail address i
gave to you.
This is the correct one;alfachambers@lawyer.com.
Have you called him today ???,
Please let me know the outcome of your discussion with him.
Thanks and best regards,
Idris
So, third time lucky??....................................................................................................
Subject: Re:New Business
Dear Sirs,
I wish for you to help Mr Idris and myself in our new
business.
Regards
Steven Lancelot Knight.
........................................................................................................................................
Subject: Good news
You can now agree with me that right from the onset that you
were not willing to assist us.You only came to waste my
precious time and money.
All the same,i advice you to get lost.
Oh well, I could have tried my luck but sod it,I`ll finish this one.......................................
Subject: Re: Good News
Dear Idris,
Thank you for your mail today.
Thank you for you bluntness,it shows good character.
Yes you are correct,I did just want to waste your time and money.
This is a hobby of mine that I enjoy very much.
I love to bait you Nigerian 419 scammers and then place all my mails
from you,with copys of documents,then place them on my website for the
whole world to see.
This making it harder for you heartless scum Mugu's to con more people.
I had alot of fun baiting you,so how about a nice comment from you
before I update my website.
If not ,then I say goodbye you dum ass half witted twat,it has been
great laughing at you ,stupid Mugu, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Steve.
Anti Scammer
I wonder if I`ll get a reply???............................................................................................
I DO! Three Days Later this Hits My Inbox......................................................................
Subject: Good News
Steve,
I have known for long that you are a fool that has all the
time in the world to waste.
All the same, i advice you to kick your ass off and give me
chance since you are not interested to get rich, you will
forever remain poor.If you wantto be rich out of luck, do
get back.
Stupid fool, please get lost.
Idris
Right ,Did he call me a fool? The Wrath of Mr Udo Watt Explodes, he he he he.............................
Subject: Re: Good News
Dearest idris,
What a foolish mugu you are.
I have all the time in the world to bait 419 fraudsters like you
because I am a very rich man with no need to work,unlike you I fear,I
made my money honestly from my great grandfather who bought slaves off your
Great grandfather who had captured them.(Ok Sorry a bit over the top,but Im just getting Started).
So get back in your little tin hut in your refugee center and cook up
some rice.
Oh by the way,Aids is untreatable so no raping young girls now as this
is just a lie made up by your witch doctors,so looks like you are in
for a slow painful death buddy.
Now get off the computer in the internet cafe' as I am sure some of
them are being baited by me and I am waiting for their stupid mugu
mails.
Have a nice day mugu scum bag,I laught at you, ha ha ha ha ha ha
Steve.
............................NOTE: If This Offends Anyone Mail me and it will be removed........................
