| 8/7/01: I thought today was going to be just another boring day, until fourth period. Fourth period is band, and after we were done playing (right before school let out), I was sitting around talking to some of the other members. Brian Smith turned to me and told me to tell Leigh Ann Martin (see "My Excursion into the Wonderful World of Rights Violation" in my articles) and he told me to tell her the "thing about the rock". Finally it dawned on me that he was talking about a discussion that he and I had roughly two years ago, in which I presented to him an argument on omnipotence (the old "Can God make a rock so big he can't lift it" brain teaser). I turned to Leigh and asked her this, and she just held her nose up and said "I don't have to answer this" and walked off. Another fellow (don't know his name) came up to me and we started to discuss this at length. Before we really got started though, some black girl started shouting at me from across the room. When I continued to talk to this guy, she got flustered and shouted "He-llo, I'm trying to talk to you". I turned to her and said, "Yeah, and I'm trying to talk to him." I continued in the conversation with him, she started screaming some crap I wasn't even paying attention to, and then said "Well, apparently you can't answer that." I paid no attention. This guy's answer to my argument is, "Well, God can't do everything, like, he can't come down and kill you." I started naming off examples in the Old Testament of God doing just this, and his excuse was, "Well, we're under a new covenant." Before I could answer this, he said "Are you saved?" When I replied "No," he acted like he couldn't believe it. Then he asked "So, you don't believe in God?" I replied "Yes, that's right". The bell rang then, and he said "We can talk about this more tomorrow." I wonder if we will.... |
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| 8/16/01: Me and the sax player I mentioned in my last entry (for the record, his name is Micah) have been discussing our theological points of view for several days now. He's an alright guy, and doesn't seem to condemn me. In fact, he seems to enjoy discussing this stuff more than me. In my Sociology class for the past couple of days, we've also been heavily discussing religion and it's influence on the mind and human culture, and I'm one of the few people in the class that's not afraid to speak his mind. I think most of the people in there are unaware I'm an atheist, but I'm sure it's coming. Of course, you know I don't make a journal entry unless I'm ready to bitch about something, so here it is...the prayer group again. Just like last year, they're waiting right until the bell rings (signaling the end of our 10 minute break) to form the colossal circle right in front of the intrance to the main building. Last year (see my older journal entries), they did this crap once and I just walked through the middle of the circle. This time, they were all packed between the main building and the cafeteria like sardines, and there was NO WAY AROUND OR THROUGH THEM. So I just sighed and walked all the way around the building to the rear entrance. I wish now that I had walked through the circle, perhaps to draw attention to the fact that they're in the way of the people who aren't praying (about a quarter of the whole school). Of course, I'm sure that they don't give a shit, but it would make me feel like I was doing more than taking this sitting down, at the most. Oh well, there's always tomorrow. |
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| 9/19/01: I haven't had a chance to update the page, but last Friday (the 14th), there was a "Womanless beauty review" in the gym. For the cost of one dollar, you can see the dopey jocks of the school nance around in dresses pretending to be female. I wasn't going to go, but everyone else in my 4th period class (band) was going, so the band director said she'd pay my way in. So I get in there, and some dip by the door passes out a red, white, and blue tassle to hang on my car. I was instantly reminded of hearing on CNN about the sudden patriotic...as well as religious...boom the country is going through as a result of the terrorist attacks. I shrugged it off, until I sat in the bleachers, and as soon as everyone got quiet, Brother Dan Bullock gets on the microphone and leads in a prayer. I was quite pissed, but I didn't leave. I wasn't in the mood to deal with the commotion it would cause. I regretted this later, but I just sat there and took it. Not that the prayer itself bothered me, but the coercion certainly did. Anyway, today was Christian T-shirt day (?!?!?), so there were a bunch of dopes wearing "Christian by Choice" shirts (yeah, sure you are). There was also the biggest prayer circle I've ever seen...I'd estimate 90% of the school...at "See you at the pole" this morning. To top that off, some dipshit woman was out there with a camcorder. That's pretty pathetic when you want to film a public religious display for anything but pyschological fascination...and she didn't strike me as that type. Things are about to get a lot more annoying...maybe even more difficult...in my neck of the woods. |
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| 10/4/01: Today's event certainly wasn't much, but it did get me thinking about the way non-theists are viewed around here. At lunch, I was sitting a few seats down from one of the Math teachers of the school, Mr. Cade. Another staff member (I don't know her name) sat across from him and they started talking. I was unaware of their conversation until I heard Mr. Cade say "...the guy who wrote this was an atheist." I looked to my left just in time to see a look of horror creep across the woman's face. I noticed that Mr. Cade was pointing to the book he had been reading. Cade quickly added, "but while doing some research, he found out the truth." As soon as these words left his mouth, I gagged on the chicken sandwich I had been scarfing down. Neither seemed to notice. Also as soon as he said this, I noticed (between coughs) the woman's look of relief. She said, "Oh, that's good". Sure it is. By the time I was finished eating, she had left and Cade was back to reading his book. I walked past the front of him to catch the title of the book: The Case for Christ by Lee Strobel. I've had several fundies recommend this book to me. I'm thinking about reading it now, for a laugh. If you've read this book, drop me a line and tell me how it was. |
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| 12/15/01: I've been really sidetracked by work and school lately...so even though this happened a week ago, I figure I'll mention it. In third period, a guest speaker named Andy Armstrong came into the class to talk about life goals and fullfilling dreams. This fellow and his nephew had, in the summer of 2000, ridden bicycles all the way across the country. He showed us copies of his card that he handed to people along the way (I immediately got suspicious when I noticed Bible verses printed on the back), and mentioned "the grace of God" a couple of times. Actually, though, he wasn't a bad speaker. This is what annoyed me, though. We took an intermission from his speech and went to lunch, and when we got back, there were two slips of paper on everyone's desk. A white leaflet about the trip he took...and then a large yellow piece of paper. Since it's a long and boring read, I'll disect it piece by piece below (the text of the paper is in bold, all mistakes intact). I Want to Share This With You A Christian Mother and Father who took me to church and exposed me to Sunday School, BTU, Sunbeams, and RA's, laid the foundation for my adult life. I grew up as a child knowing the love that God had for me and the great sacrifice he made in sending His son Jesus Christ to die for my sins. So basically he knew Christ died for his sins because his parents told him? I wonder how many conservative Christians have had the same experience? As a 12 year old in an Easter Revival at First Baptist Church in Meridian I realized that the Holy Spirit was working with me. Those lessons that had taught me of man's sinfulness and God's love became real as I accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior. I knew it was what I was suppose to do. You've probably noticed several grammatical errors ("suppose to do"?), as well as a lack of punctuation. Too bad Christ didn't give him a better education. As a teenager with the help ofmy family, pastors, music and youth directors I grew in my Christian walk. The association with people who loved and served God help me to stay close to my Savior though the turbulent teens. I felt so strongly about my commitment toward Christ I would I wouldn't date a girl that I felt couldn't end each date in a prayer. It was during these teenage years that I felt the Lord calling me to full time Christian service. I thought that would be a preacher, youth, musci or educational director, but today I realize the call I answered was one that all who accept Christ should respond to "the call to daily service". A few things here..."Christian Walk?" Do they have a special walk? This guy seemed to walk pretty normally. Then we have "though the turbulent teens'. Though the turbulent teens....WHAT? What did they do? He probably means THROUGH, but anyway...I'm now looking at "I would I wouldn't date a girl that I felt couldn't end each date in a prayer". Would you or Wouldn't you? My years at USM on a football scholarship, opened my eyes to the world outside my conservative Christian environment of my home and church. I saw a world that I had never seen before. I praise the Lord that during this time he cause a series of events to occur that kept me in His fold. A BSU director (Louie Farmer), a caring church (FBC in Hattiesburg), a summer job at Glorietta, a wonderful girl named Dottie all gave me the support I need to resist the world that had opened before me. Oh, yeah. You really have to keep away from the non-conservative world, especially us baby-munching, fire-breathing atheists. Thanks to this Farmer guy, some church, a job at a place I've never heard of, and his wife to be, he stayed a fundie. Oh well, he probably would have, anyway. I believe the Lord sent Dottie and Me to work on the staff at Glorietta for the purpose of having us meet. After a long distant courtship of a year and a half we were married. Our prayer was that God would show us what he wanted us to do with our lives. Through the twists and turns that culd have only been led by God our love and famioly grew. Famioly? Isn't that an Italian dish? That's okay, because I'm now wondering why if he's so worried about what God wants, why did he bike across the country, which was something HE wanted to do? He might be wasting God's valuable time! Shame! While I was working as a salesman in Bowling Green Ky. God led us to a small country church (Burton Memorial). We became very active in that church especially with the young people. It was then I realized what God had been calling me to do. I returned to Southern Mississippi and received a degree in education. Frightening, no? This guy is the best horror writer since Poe. Teaching expreiences in Prentiss and Pascagoula led to an opportunity to come to Newton to teach. This was the town where both of my parents had been raised. We came to Newton with the confidence that this is what God was willing for our lives. We joined the church (FBC) were my grandparents had been active members and settled down to make a life. Damn sure talks a lot about where God is leading him. So god controls what we do? What about Free Will? Sounds like this guy needs to get a life, not make one. The Lord has blessed me beyond my wildest dreams. I am amazed at the patience God has shown in my life. He has provided me various opportunites to serve Him. He has given me a loving church family. He has given me an opportunity to share His love with the over three thousand students I have taught over the last twenty-nine years. He has provided strength when things were tough. He had kept me humble when things were going good. He has given me guidance in my daily life. Shared his love with over three thousand students? Isn't that just terrifying? Too bad he didn't teach me, I could have told him where to stick His love. >:) I have a long way to go in becoming what Christ wants me to be. Many times I find myself going through the motions of a Christian life, picking and choosing what I will or will not do. Yet God is patience and provides me another chance. I do not deserve the love that god has bestowed on me. I guess that is what is so wonderful about life in Christ, He accepts us as we are while admonishing us to be better. I realize that I can do all things IF I allow GOD to strengthen me. Once again with "What God wants". Yes, that's right. Don't live your life the way you want, live it the way a fictional character wants. Now, if you'll excuse me, Garfield is calling me to move to Schwanz, Ohio. Thank you God, first of all, for your Son who died for me and shose death and resurrection I place my hope of eternal life. Thank you for my parents and the Christian home in which I was raised. Thank you for Dottie and our three children and our six wonderful grandchildren. Thank you for a loving church family and staff that provide a shelter from the world's problems. Thank you for the opportunity to teach. Thank you for retirement. Thank you for the opportunities of service to you. Lord forgive me in all the times I disappoint you. Help me to be the Christan you want me to be. Lord I love you! I think he mistakenly gave the class letters he had been intending to give to God. Talk all you want about dreams Mr. Armstrong, but keep your damn religion to yourself. If you live around here, be on the lookout for this guy. Go to www.meridanstar.com and seach in the archives for Andy Armstrong to get his story. E-mail him at aada@aol.com if you like, and talk to him about bicycling. Maybe even preaching in school, if that's your preferred topic. Just remember, I'm not telling you to do that. God is leading you to do it. |
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| 1/19/02: Since the school operates off of the block-style schedule, we only have four classes a day, rotated each semester. Suffice it to say, I'm in new classes now. Second Period is Mrs. Dunnam's Advanced History. Oh no. Mrs. Dunnam is an old lady who speaks with a stereotypical "Miss Scaaaaalet" Southern accent (and the only person I've ever known that spoke like that, no matter what accents you hear in Hollywood movies). She is very frantic and will often jump into a chair to get the classes attention. And Mrs. Dunnam, in case you don't remember (and you probably don't), is the same teacher I talked about around a year ago in my journal, who would always have a class prayer before lunch, in which I would always walk out. That was illegal as hell, but I didn't complain because I got my lunch while everyone else spoke to the invisible man. Oh, excuse me, I mean the Invisible Man. You know how fundies are about capitalization. Anyway, she gets into religion a LOT during her lectures. She keeps reminding the class, "Now I don't really like to get into this, but you can't talk about history without mentioning religion." True. Very true. However, you can get into religion without telling us WHO'S RIGHT AND WHO ISN'T. An example: The Salem Witch trials came up in a discussion recently. One of my brilliant classmates asked Mrs. Dunnam, "Did them people really practice black magic?", and she answered by going into the following speech: Dunnam: Well, I think we all know that there is Good vs. Evil in the world. Class: Yeah.... Dunnam: I mean, even if you don't believe in God, you can't deny that there's evil and good in the world. That's a proven fact, right? Class: Yeah.... Dunnam: So when you get down to it, these witches, this is a very old religion, they pray to inanimate objects, believed they all have spirits, and all that. And when you get down to it, that's really....that's just worshipping Satan. Me: *snicker* Yeah, I laughed. Kind of a choke really. I was both amused and disgusted by her ignorance. Since when do Wiccans pray to inanimate objects? And worshpping the Devil? Come on, Wicca is a peaceful religion that doesn't involve little horned men. But not only is she showing intolerance toward them, she's telling students to as well. But I guess that's Fundy nature....if we don't understand it, it's the FRUITS OF THE DEVIL. And what's this crap about "you can't deny there is evil and good in the world"? Er, yes, I can. What determines good? What determines evil? Do you think someone just jumps up one day and says "I'm Evil!"? Some people may jokingly say that, but damn. There is no ultimate good, there is no ultimate evil. Every person has a dark side (especially fundies, from what I can tell). |
| 1/23/02: More lunacy from Mrs. Dunnam's class. Today we were talking about the structure of the U.S. Government, and someone asked was "that thing about no prayer at football games done by the state". Mrs. Dunnam replied yes, but surprisingly didn't go any further into the topic...however, the rest of the class did. A couple of guys behind me were muttering about it, and one of them said, "Hey, Mrs. Dunnam, doesn't that violate freedom of religion? I mean, they don't have to listen to the prayer or anything." I turned around. "They have to listen if you do it over a loud speaker." "Huh? Naw, that's what they make earplugs for." Everyone in the room got laugh out of that, and a couple of people said to the other boy "You tell 'em, Michael!" Worst part is, I couldn't tell were they serious or not. Anyway, just thought this incident deserved an honorary place in my journal. |
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| 1/29/02: Still MORE from Mrs. Dunnam's class. Today, it's abortion. Oh boy. Dunnam was telling us about certain ancient civilizations that would kill unwanted babies. She then started talking about abortion, saying "We're supposed to be so much more civilized than they were, and we butcher just as many innocent babies. Now I ask you: What's the difference between throwing a baby out to the buzzards and going into the womb and sucking one's brain's out with a vaccum hose?" Apparently, Mrs. Dunnam isn't too familiar with the procedure of abortion. In any case, I answered: "One is a developed human, and one isn't." The entire class turned in their desks and started at me with murderous looks on their faces. Michael (the guy I mentioned in my last entry) replies: "No. Uh-uh. You're wrong." Mrs. Dunnam quickly went back to the actual topic of the class, saying "Well, I really don't want to get a discussion started." And it was left at that. This disgusted me, because it's just another example of Mrs. Dunnam trying to preach her views to the class. This may be my last semester, but what an interesting one it will be... |
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| 2/25/02: You probably already know where I was when this happened...just think: Where have my past three entries happened? If you guessed Mrs. Dunnam's class, then you've been paying attention. Or maybe you just scrolled up, but either way you're right. Today it was discussion about Manifest Destiny, and religioius attitudes of the early 1800s. The Rev. Josiah Strong was in our notes, because he had said that the United States should be the "Center of a great Christian universe". While discussing this, Mrs. Dunnam explained Strong's point of view, saying things like, "I mean, this was founded a Christian country. It even says 'under God' in our Pledge of Alligience." She went on to say, of course, that this contradicted the Constitution and went on to say that she didn't at all condone Strong's views. But it was the sheer ignorance that angered me. This was not founded a Christian nation. Nowhere in any of the old documents of this country does it say anything about religion, aside from religous freedom. And as for the Pledge, it wasn't written until over 100 years after the founding of this country, and the words "under God" weren't added to it until 1954. Since this was in Mrs. Dunnam's lifetime (she's in her sixties), I'd think she'd know this. But enough of this anger. Something I found humorous today, while I was driving home: Recently, one of the churches that I drive past had on it's sign "The 1st step to Heaven is: Know you are lost!". Today, however, they had changed it. It now reads: "The 2nd step to Heaven is: Drop to your knees!". I couldn't help but notice how suggestive this sounded....kinda makes me wonder what the third step is going to be. |
| 2/28/02: Yesterday, during break, I was getting a Coke out of the drink machine outside of the cafeteria when I heard someone say my name. There was a familiar looking fellow (I don't know his name) standing between the vending machines, trying to keep warm (it was below 40 degrees that day, and very windy). A group of other boys approached him and started talking to him. He turned back to me and asked how I was doing, then the following conversation took place. "Hey, Doug, why don't you hang out with us?" "Thanks for the offer, but no." "Hey, we're having a revival at my church this Sunday. Want to come?" "No thanks." "Why not?" "I'm not a church-goer." "Why not?" This is the point where I should have told him politely that it was none of his damn business, but I played along. "I'm just not religous, that's all." "Why aren't you religious? It gives you that warm feeling." I stood there for a second and stared. I think he finally realized that he was shivering from the cold and I wasn't. "Well, I mean, you know," he finally said. "Why aren't you cold?" I smiled. "The fires of Hell are keeping me warm." Actually, it's because I was wearing cotton under polar fleece under my leather jacket, but he didn't have to know that. He looked at me quizzically. "So, you're going to hell?" Normally, I don't hear that in question form. "No," I replied, "I was joking. I don't believe in Hell." "What about Heaven?" "No." "God?" "No." "Well, I mean, I'm not making fun of you or anything, I mean my uncle, like, he doesn't believe that people go directly to heaven or hell, or something like that. I was just making conversation." He then turned around and started talking to his friends, who had been standing quietly listening to us. Weird. But that's not all! I've got two topics for this entry, and the other one happened today in you-know-who's class. The conversation came up about how well the Presidents do their jobs, and Mrs. Dunnam, of course, hated Bill Clinton and adores George Bush (the sequel). She said that one of the main reasons that so many people (although she was obviously just talking about herself) liked "Dubya" is the way he handled the September terrorist attacks. Then, for some reason, a black boy at the back of the class said, "What I don't get is: How did the Lord let that happen to all those innocent people?" Oh boy, I thought. Here we go. "Well," said Mrs. Dunnam, "I think it has to do with God's plan..." She then went into her same long speech about how everyone knows there is good and evil in the world, then said God gave us free will. I don't know what that means (I suppose all those people chose to die), but the whole class seemed satisfied with her answer. She then concluded with "Well, I mean that's just my opinion, anyway. I can't prove it." Today's incident was about as close to preaching as Mrs. Dunnam has ever gotten, and I was quite disgusted. I would complain, but she's supposed to retire after this year (her seventeenth year of teaching at Enterprise), so I don't think I'll bother. But I certainly won't go on taking her sermons without speaking up myself. It pisses everyone else off, but if they can talk about theology, why can't I? |
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